First Love, First Heartbreak | Teen Ink

First Love, First Heartbreak

May 24, 2013
By BrokenTogether GOLD, Saraland, Alabama
BrokenTogether GOLD, Saraland, Alabama
10 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love...and be loved in return..." -Christian, Moulin Rouge

Once upon a time, A girl moved to a new school and, unbeknownst to her, a boy entered that school for the first time also, the same year as she. A few weeks into the year, the girl watched the boy on the morning announcements. He was standing upright in a uniform, giving a speech which she only barely paid attention to. Then the girl had a problem: she suddenly needed somewhere to sit at lunch. So she and her friend went and sat with the boy, who promptly scolded her for asking about something he’d explained during the speech she’d only barely paid attention to. Still, she ate lunch with him every day, sometimes silently, sometimes discussing things she assumed only crossed her mind but it turns out he thought about, as well. And then, before they knew it, they weren’t just tolerating each other at lunch; they were also sitting beside each other during their classes and race-walking through the hallways. She would unbuckle one of the latches on his military book bag and he would pretend to be mad at her, even though he appreciated the challenge she posed amidst a sea of imbeciles who cared not to understand him.

As the year progressed, the girl realized that she was beginning to like this boy, genuinely and not just because he was all that was available. She found they had things in common and that, beneath his stoic appearance, there was a huge heart and a witty sense of humor. She began to listen to him as he opened up to her and in return, she opened up to him. She often spoke longingly of her days at her previous school and how she couldn’t wait to move onto a new one the next year. He listened intently, forcing her to eat gummies while she glared at him, trying not to smile.

Then Christmas break came and passed, they moved to a new seat for lunch, away from all of the loud noises that hindered conversations otherwise. They began speaking everyday in class, glancing at each other across the room when their history teacher pronounced something horrendously incorrect. They found that they worked well together, on projects and with other people and that they each made the other’s life easier, more bearable. And soon, it was more than tolerance that they gave each other; there was also laughter. And music. He began letting her borrow books and as she read them, she found herself falling into a world that only she and him shared. Now, though the boy and the girl were growing closer, she was still ready to leave the horrid school with its rigid rules and uninterestingly mundane people. So she began to speak of a new school, one just for kids like her, where she could advance her education. And again, like before, he sat and lingered on every word silently and attentively.

Spring came quickly and they continued their daily routine. It became almost necessary for them to be together and it went unnoticed only to them that they were incontrovertibly perfect for each other. Then the end of the year approached and the girl felt something stirring, an emptiness in the bottom of her chest that she couldn’t place and that she certainly didn’t like. She found herself giving sidelong glances to the boy, sometimes catching his eye and waiting for him to smile or raise an eyebrow before she turned away, only to let her thoughts wander to the ‘what if’ realm of possibility regarding the boy. The last week of school came along and it had been decided for quite a while that she wouldn’t be back next year. So she decided to do the best with what she had left, and enjoy it. She joked with all of her new friends, told them how she’d miss them, and let them know how much she enjoyed the time she’d spent with them. But there was one friend in particular she couldn’t make herself acknowledge, at least not with the finality she had with all of the others: the boy.

And so the night before the last day of school, she wrote him a letter. Thinking he would never feel towards her the way she felt about him, she kept it as shallow as possible. But, she hoped, she’d gotten her point across. So she kept the note in her pocket the entire day, running her fingers across it, contemplating how it was soon going to be time to really have to say goodbye. The last class of the day rolled around and he came to visit her and they talked and joked, like they had for months before. But there was something in the air between them and in the back of her mind she was falling apart. “Don’t leave me,” she thought; but he wasn’t the one going. So they stopped in the hallway, that boy and girl who began their year as strangers, ended it with “I love you”. He placed a folded up piece of paper in her backpack and she placed one in his hand. They looked each other in the eye one last time. He raised his eyebrow and smiled and she fled as the tears overwhelmed her. He pulled away into a humid, summer day and she sat, unfolding the note slowly as she struggled to understand what she was reading.

Once upon a time, A girl moved to a new school and, unbeknownst to her, a boy entered that school for the first time also, the same year as she. A few weeks into the school year, he was just an image on a television screen with an alien voice and a standoffish demeanor. But then this girl and this boy became friends, the kind you only get once in a lifetime- the kind that really change you. For her, this boy fell hard and unexpectedly. For him, this girl fell unwittingly and whole-heartedly. And as she watched him disappear behind the curve of a road, she felt a part of her go with him, to stay forever in his company as she wished she could herself. Maybe this girl and boy will see each other again some day, for they both wish it so. Or maybe she will spend a life time retracing her fingers over the letter given her by her first love and her first heartbreak, who said “I know you don’t feel the same way,” wishing she’d just told him. She loves him, and that is a commitment the heart makes for a lifetime.

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