An Easy Way to Avoid Bullies | Teen Ink

An Easy Way to Avoid Bullies

December 31, 2014
By HappyEmeal GOLD, Lahore, Other
HappyEmeal GOLD, Lahore, Other
16 articles 4 photos 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
When life knocks you down, Dhuzzz! Just puzza back up!!!

Sometimes, it becomes difficult to understand my own species. 

I have always tried to be a good person, to be the best I can be, to not hurt anyone's feelings, or make anyone feel left out. Maybe I live by this rule because I have often been a victim of this sort of behaviour. I have been hurt by others, felt left out, always trailed behind a group of girls like a puppy. But instead of feeling upset or making a big deal out of it, I try to avoid doing so myself. I am not saying I have never felt upset when I get left out or someone is mean to me - Frankly, I drown in depression - but that doesn't mean I will treat others the way I am treated to make myself feel better.

The major concept behind bullying is the bully taking out anger or frustration on someone who is vulnerable. Most of my bullies basically survived on this statement, and I would be tormented and ridiculed in every possible way. Most of us would want to take revenge, hope for something bad to happen to them, or try to hurt them back somehow. But if we seek revenge, we are no longer the victim. We become the bully. So why should someone pity us when we are trying to hurt the bully back, or take out our frustration on someone else? 

This act of taking-out-your-anger-on-someone-else only starts a chain reaction. A child got scolded at home, so he decides to take out his anger on a boy in his class. That boy is upset and will take out his anger on another. And on and on this goes. The best way to avoid becoming a product of this reaction is very simple - ignore and/or relate. 

This is a theory I started treating like the key to a happy life, and things have started looking good. If your bully (or anyone) has had a bad day and is marching your way, blood boiling and steam hissing out his ears, don't fret. Be concerned. Ask them if everything is alright, be involved. Be a friend to them, even if it kills you to do so. And do not fake it. It's already a bad thing to be a phony, and faking friendship to save yourself is playing with someone's feelings. That only makes someone even more angry and guess who has to act as the punching bag? 

If you're going to fake the I-am-concerned-for-you emotions, it's better to just step out of the bully's way. This is where 'ignore' steps in. If you do not want to befriend the enemy, don't. No one is foring you. After all, you know what sort of person he/she is, and if it's better to be nice, or act invisible. Just blend in with the others, and try to not make the day worse for the bully. You can neverknow what someone is thinking or going through, and you do not want to make matters worse for anyone

Bullying is a serious matter in today's soceity and cannot be stopped very easily. Every person is different, and you cannot always relate to someone, no matter how experieneced you are. It should be stopped, and sometimes you have to become visible in order to save someone from getting a blue eye. The best way is to try to help the bully. If that doesn't work, just blend in with the crowd. 

The author's comments:

I have been bullied for nearly ten years, but started to deal with it. I started to befriend my tormentors, and it turned out they all had one thing in common; pressure from families, friends, or school. Someone had to listen to their parents fight, while others were having a hard time at school, struggling with grades. You should always try to get to know someone before you start treating them the ay you do, whether it's a bully or your neighbour who lives next door. 

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