The Unknown | Teen Ink

The Unknown

March 7, 2011
By Hook11lives, Bridgeport, Washington
Hook11lives, Bridgeport, Washington
0 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Summary:

Four friends, Tyson, Kassie, Jordan, and Erin are stuck on an island. There plane crashes on an unknown tropical island off the coast of Washington. They have to survive and figure out where the rest of there class is. Along with figuring things out with themselves.


Antonio L.

The Unknown


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This book has 7 comments.


Steph0804 GOLD said...
on Dec. 29 2011 at 3:15 am
Steph0804 GOLD, Seoul, Other
12 articles 4 photos 206 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog: you understand it better, but the frog dies in the process." -E.B. White

I wrote my first story in first grade, it was called "Mr. Potato and Mrs. Zucchini" :P

Steph0804 GOLD said...
on Dec. 29 2011 at 3:15 am
Steph0804 GOLD, Seoul, Other
12 articles 4 photos 206 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog: you understand it better, but the frog dies in the process." -E.B. White

Cool! I wrote my first story in first grade, but that was literally a page long and it was about two characters named Mr. Potato and Mrs. Zucchini :P

on Dec. 29 2011 at 12:09 am
TheCoffeeKitten BRONZE, Saugatuck, Michigan
4 articles 0 photos 32 comments
I like this story so far. =) It's got a very interesting plot to it, from what I've read. One thing that I would suggest is perhaps writing with a bit more emotion--really SHOW us what the characters are feeling, don't tell us. It's an easy thing to do, but something that ALL writer's struggle with. However, I do like it so far, and the style is interesting! Keep it up! =) ~CK

Hook11lives said...
on Dec. 28 2011 at 10:39 pm
Hook11lives, Bridgeport, Washington
0 articles 0 photos 5 comments
thanks for the comments. iknow i wrote that in 6th grade and it was first story.

on Oct. 4 2011 at 8:16 pm
shootingstar97 SILVER, Calgary, Other
5 articles 0 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is a canvas..... THROW AS MUCH PAINT ON IT AS YOU CAN!
I have no other reason but a woman's reason: I think so because I think so. (Two Centlemen of Verona, Act 1, Scene 2)

o and btws - to make other countries jealous........ :D <3!

on Oct. 4 2011 at 8:15 pm
shootingstar97 SILVER, Calgary, Other
5 articles 0 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is a canvas..... THROW AS MUCH PAINT ON IT AS YOU CAN!
I have no other reason but a woman's reason: I think so because I think so. (Two Centlemen of Verona, Act 1, Scene 2)

I agree. It has a good plot and characters, but I think you need to develop them a bit more - maybe like show a bit of feeling. ex: a wave of terror hit me. where was everyone?

Steph0804 said...
on Jul. 21 2011 at 10:11 am

Problem; are the kids fazed at all by their friends' deaths? Also, the language is kind of detached and quick-paced, like it's a summary of the real story. Plus, realistically, kids with superpowers would be rounded up by the government for experimentation or safekeeping or just to make other countries jealous...

Still, if you work on this story and extend it, I really think you can turn it into a great novel :)