I believe in burps. | Teen Ink

I believe in burps.

March 14, 2011
By Marklevin8 SILVER, Los Altos, California
Marklevin8 SILVER, Los Altos, California
7 articles 0 photos 1 comment

When you do it everyone always stares. Sometimes they scowl. Sometimes they awkwardly laugh. Recently, people have just been telling me it’s disgusting. But no matter what, I just can’t stop doing it. When that bubble of sticky stomach gas finally releases from my mouth and makes that joyous vibration, I get a real kick out of it. I really feel it lets people learn a little bit more about me—what I ate for lunch to be specific—and that is something I would never want to hide.
So I hear some people believe in God, but I believe in burping. I believe in the spontaneity. I believe in my satiated state as that burp relieves all the grumbles that come with a large soda. I believe in all burps, small and large, Big-Mac-flavored and coke-flavored, for their originality and their style, for their pure honesty and their ability to heal.
To me, a burp represents rawness. It’s so unmodified and original. For its simplicity, a burp is just as beautiful as the naked body, and in the same way most people prefer to see nude models to clothed models, I prefer to observe nude burps. I see muffled burps as far too prude. Muffling a burp is a façade. It’s hiding our beautiful flaws. That’s why lately I like to force out my burps. I’ll push and push and push so hard my stomach begins to cringe and finally I’ll let out that lovely burp. It’ll be so liberating. I really can’t wait until my next soda.
Girls think it’s not lady-like. But to be honest, I wish a girl would just unload an earthquake of stale scents into my face. I wish my nostrils could soak up her last meal, her insecurities, everything she’s trying to hide. I’d probably marry her.
Our wedding would be marvelous, groundbreaking, visionary, and most importantly, a bit stinky. We would read our vows recount our most marvelous belches and we’d seal it not with a kiss but by burping in each other’s mouths. And it would be beautiful, raw, so pure and honest, but for some reason every girl I’ve asked has denounced the idea and then proceeded to apply more makeup.

Similar Articles


This article has 2 comments.

on Jun. 6 2011 at 6:26 pm
Untouchable-Summer SILVER, Cranford, New Jersey
6 articles 0 photos 86 comments

Favorite Quote:
Even the best fall down sometimes

Eww! :) But so funny and well written, I have to say ;)

on Mar. 24 2011 at 10:54 pm
KunaiNinjaFighter SILVER, Monticello, Arkansas
7 articles 0 photos 67 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Think left and thing right, Think low and Think High, Oh the thinks you can think up, if only you try!" Dr. Suess oh and "Two things are infinite: The Universe and Human Stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.'- Albert Einstein

Hey, I'm a girl and I burb plenty loud! My parents get on to me for it, but I do it anyway. Though the whole burping in mouths thing.... sorry but ew... *shudders*