what if | Teen Ink

what if

March 13, 2011
By writetillidie7 SILVER, Alexandria, Virginia
writetillidie7 SILVER, Alexandria, Virginia
9 articles 1 photo 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"science takes you to the moon. religion takes you into buildings."

what if i woke up one day in a room with four white walls that had no pictures, postcards, or drawings hanging from them? and what if - on this day - i had no desire to hang up any such things? just a square room. a window for light, a lamp for night, a bed for sleeping, a closet for clothes. the essentials. what if my camera was covered in a thick layer of dust, put away on purpose somewhere in the attic? what if every instrument in this house was out of tune and showed no signs of ever being tuned again? what if i spent my days in silence because music meant very little to me? what if i skimmed through poetry and rolled my eyes? what if, when i looked at a piece of art, i thought nothing of it? what if i had no lists of books to read or films to watch??? what if i did math problems in my head until i fell asleep? what if the word “imagination” was just a word that reminded me of very young children? what if i had no desire to write each night before i slept? ??what if i thought covering my hands in doodles with a permanent marker was a stupid idea and didn’t understand how it could be fun? what if i didn’t dare to do the crazy things in life i sometimes do, like staying up for ridiculous amounts of time or shouting hilarious obscenities? what if i thought of absolutely nothing on long car/train rides, except for how far i had gone and how far i still had to go? what if i liked things to be logical, and always thought with my head instead of my heart??? what if i thought rain was a terrible nuisance and always had an umbrella on me? what if climbing trees was something i outgrew years back? what if the sun beaming on my shoulders meant nothing but the possibility of sun burn? what if the feeling i got from sitting outside at night could be described in four simple words? sitting. outside. at. night. what if that was it??? what would i be then? what could ever come next?

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This article has 2 comments.

on Apr. 17 2011 at 3:10 pm
PaRaNoRmAl627 GOLD, Mountainside, New Jersey
15 articles 0 photos 296 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Do what you want. If it's something you'll regret in the morning, sleep late."

The lack of pefect grammar was really creative for this piece. I mean like the no capitalization thing. I feel like it really accentuated the lack of feeling you're supposed to imagine. I also liked that you started out kind of emotionless, and gradually started to get more and more into it as you kept going. It made for a very interesting piece, and I really enjoyed it. :) My only suggestion would be to stay away from using more than one punctuation mark. The spots where you used like three question marks made it seem very informal, almost like chat lingo rather than a formal writing piece. Sometimes people have a hard time taking things seriously if the grammar is less than perfect. Overall though, I liked it a lot :) good job :)

on Apr. 17 2011 at 12:27 pm
nickykens ELITE, Draper, Utah
134 articles 2 photos 85 comments
I'll admit I was very hesitant to read because of the lack of spacing; it looked somewhat daunting.  But I convinced myself to give it a shot and I'm glad I did.  It was beautiful.  I've never thought of that before but now once I do it scares me.  What if that was true?  The line I connect with most is "what if I had no desire to write before I sleep?".  Very, very good.  Congrats.