Childish Games | Teen Ink

Childish Games

June 29, 2011
By pill.happy.adventure PLATINUM, Manchester, New Hampshire
pill.happy.adventure PLATINUM, Manchester, New Hampshire
21 articles 3 photos 41 comments

Little brother, little brother
Why do you sit in that cupboard?
It’s childish and foolish so why do you do this?
Little brother, little brother
Do you go in there to hide from the yelling of our mother?
It’s childish and foolish so why do you do this?

Little brother, little brother

Do you go in there to hide from the world and it’s ugly?
Oh how I bet that is lovely…
But…it’s childish and foolish…

Little brother, little brother I have but one more thing to say
Little brother, little brother can I come in your cupboard and play?

The author's comments:
This is just to remind people about when they were little kids. And how its not always had to go back to that everyonce and awhile.

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This article has 7 comments.

on Jan. 22 2012 at 12:46 pm
Hannibal_the_Vegetarian_Cannibal SILVER, A Nice Place In, Virginia
7 articles 2 photos 43 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass; it's about learning to dance in the rain." ~Anonymous

"For he loved her, as you can only love someone who is an echo of yourself in your time of deepest sorrow." ~ Orson Scott Card

I love this! It's so cute, but has a deeper darker meaning. I especially love the last line. And the repetition just adds to the overall amazingness! :D Congrats again on getting published!

leafy said...
on Jan. 21 2012 at 5:43 pm
leafy, City, Other
0 articles 0 photos 682 comments

Favorite Quote:
Gil: I would like you to read my novel and get your opinion. 
Ernest Hemingway: I hate it. 
Gil: You haven't even read it yet. 
Ernest Hemingway: If it's bad, I'll hate it. If it's good, then I'll be envious and hate it even more. You don't want the opinion of another writer. 

Cute poem, it made me smile. I have a couple issues with it though. First, to keep congruity with the restof the poem, I'd move the line by itself to the next stanza and do line breaks after the last couple "little brother, little brother"s. Also, in line 8, the phrasing is a bit awkward and I would change it to "...from the ugly world?"

Other than those few things, I enjoyed it a lot. I like the refrains of "Little brother, little brother" and "it's childish and foolish," especially in the third stanza how you twisted it's meaning by putting in the ellipses. Overall, it was a nice poem, and congrats on getting it published! :)

ams98 said...
on Sep. 2 2011 at 10:23 am
ams98, Brighton, Michigan
0 articles 0 photos 38 comments
Its really well written and i can easily realte because sometimes i wish i could go back to being a little girl and being oblivious to everything:)

wasps said...
on Aug. 22 2011 at 3:37 pm
wasps, Other
0 articles 0 photos 153 comments
Okay, just read it again ...... and love it even more? I think I might propose to this poem ... whad'ya think? :)

wasps said...
on Aug. 22 2011 at 3:32 pm
wasps, Other
0 articles 0 photos 153 comments
This is so amazing! I love it so much! :) 

on Aug. 5 2011 at 11:59 pm
musicispassion PLATINUM, Perris, California
35 articles 0 photos 733 comments

Favorite Quote:
" Life is never easy for those who dream."
There are so many other quotes i need pages to write them

clever poem i love it i;m turning 13 tommorrow but i still try to do things i can't do any more like throw a fit in the store when i want a cookie or sit in the shopping cart while ur mom shops

on Jul. 23 2011 at 5:23 pm
TheHangingGirl BRONZE, Winter Haven, Florida
1 article 1 photo 250 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Poets utter great and wise things that they themselves can not comprehend."

AWW!!! That is heart wrenching but made me smile!