September | Teen Ink


August 18, 2011
By PaigeStreet PLATINUM, Juneau, Alaska
PaigeStreet PLATINUM, Juneau, Alaska
47 articles 0 photos 218 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Stay golden"
- Johnny (The Outsiders, S. E. Hinton)

The wind is always blowing dusty sighs
Here, in late September
Her hands had been small; gently… perfect,
But so small and slender
And cold
It creaks, like my knees. Damn.
I think I am going to cry
a corpse is always a lie
And cold

The author's comments:
(a summation of thought from Blue Dusty, a response to Seven Pt 1)

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This article has 3 comments.

leafy said...
on Nov. 19 2011 at 9:43 am
leafy, City, Other
0 articles 0 photos 682 comments

Favorite Quote:
Gil: I would like you to read my novel and get your opinion. 
Ernest Hemingway: I hate it. 
Gil: You haven't even read it yet. 
Ernest Hemingway: If it's bad, I'll hate it. If it's good, then I'll be envious and hate it even more. You don't want the opinion of another writer. 

Loved your personification with the wind. This poem has few words, but is packed with delth and meaning. I agree, thr 2nd dam.n should have its own line. Amazing, 5/5

on Oct. 12 2011 at 2:19 pm
BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM, Portland, Oregon
42 articles 11 photos 333 comments
Awesome poem. It's nice and simple, but also has amazing depth. I only have one suggestion: I think the 2nd dam.n should be given its own line, just to be consitent.

on Aug. 19 2011 at 8:27 pm
JerseyGirl716 BRONZE, Central, New Jersey
2 articles 0 photos 92 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot." -Eleanor Roosevelt

Wow... Very, very different. Awesome. I love "a corpse is always a lie"! Great job, 5/5!