I Build Up Another Wall | Teen Ink

I Build Up Another Wall

June 6, 2012
By Alyssa95 PLATINUM, Lodi, Wisconsin
Alyssa95 PLATINUM, Lodi, Wisconsin
40 articles 21 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

When I feel scared or alone.
I build up a wall.
When I am hurting and cannot continue.
I build another wall.
When no one is there and I weep through the pain.
I build up a wall.
Then I am better.
I build another wall.

All I know is protecting myself,
I know not how to let my walls down.
People say, "Just relax," or, "Let loose."
But that never worked for me.
Because I had so many walls,
One right after another.
They provided me shelter from my issues,
Kept me safe from harm,
But they also locked me down,
Unable to trust another like I should,
Unable to move forward,
Instead of continuing backwards.
So I build up another wall.
I figure that should keep me safe for now,
It should allow me to continue,
And become better than I was.
One wall after another,
That is what I have become.
Nothing more,
Nothing less,
Just a bunch of walls,
Unable to collapse.

The author's comments:
After reviewing my life and thinking about why I encounter the difficulties I do, I learned something new about myself. Never before had I realized how I was building up these imaginary barriers that blocked pain and/or bad memories from lingering too long in my mind. This poem was a reflection on how not confronting the problems at hand can become a habit until you are lying to yourself every time you think. Do not make the same mistakes as I did, confront your problems and get help if you need it.

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This article has 1 comment.

bluebird943 said...
on Jun. 16 2012 at 2:29 pm
I can really relate to this poem because of the simple, clear way you describe what you're feeling - and also because I've experienced the same thing. Keep trying to knock down those walls and keep writing.