i keep him inside of me always | Teen Ink

i keep him inside of me always

August 22, 2012
By troubled-times GOLD, Richmond, Virginia
troubled-times GOLD, Richmond, Virginia
15 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Talents include talking about the X-Files and picking up dogs."

some nights he bursts with a manic self-loathing,
unable to meet your eyes
and expecting you to feel the same,
to be ashamed. expecting you
to drown in disgust.
these nights, he doesn't know you at all.

you drink in his secrets
and when he spills his dirty gut-words onto you
you forgive him and absorb them,
every grimy morsel of hatred or lust.
you take them into your belly and you clean them,
letting your acceptance run over them (over him)
until they shine as bright as copper.

you breathe the golden secrets back into him,
purified by what he won’t call love,
trying to transform the loathing into something so beautiful.
hoping that by accepting him with your entire body
you have helped him accept himself.
hoping one day when all his secrets have been cauterized,
you will both bask in a glow of something new.

The author's comments:
i've been thinking about this concept for a few weeks now.
this was originally prose, so let me know if you think it works better that way.

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