Into the Death Trap | Teen Ink

Into the Death Trap

May 3, 2014
By Canadotas PLATINUM, Harrisonburg, Virginia
Canadotas PLATINUM, Harrisonburg, Virginia
24 articles 0 photos 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
“As our circle of knowledge expands, so does the circumference of darkness surrounding it.” --Albert Einstein


Into the death trap I go
The machine whirring around me
Like a time traveling device
If it were one
I’d go back to an earlier time
A time before the pain
The chemicals
The sorrow
The tears
Fluids course through my disease-ridden body
The shell that the cancerous hermit crab
Calls its home

Into the death trap I go
My face inches away
From the scanner
“Hold your breath; don’t breathe”
The unsympathetic voice tells me
I agree reluctantly
Not trusting my breath to come again
Learning from recent fears

Into the death trap I go
As the doctors take pictures
Finding new organs
Where nothing should be
I hear a sigh
Of contempt or sadness?
Half-full or half-empty?
I can’t tell
“Hold your breath; don’t breathe”
More pictures, more sighs

Into the death trap I go
They said this would be it
They said that I would be done
They said it wouldn’t come back
They said I would live
What kind of world kills a sixteen year old?
They said it’d be easy
They said I’d get through it
They said it’d be fine
And now, they say nothing
Just sigh, sigh again
What kind of world am I living in?

Into the death trap I go
Remembering the last image I saw
Before I entered the sterile room
My father holding my mother
For the first time since the divorce
Their synchronized tears
Giving away my illusion to living
Like believing in Santa
You think there’s a chance he’s there
Until your parents give it away
He’s not alive
You won’t be soon

Out of the death trap I go
The doctors tell me to relax
A woman comes to me
She grabs my hand
I’ve been brave
She gives it a squeeze
Wait, I say
Will I be okay?
She just smiles
It will all be okay
I promise
They leave the room
I listen to the sounds
The machine cooling down
Beeps from their laboratory
My mother crying
As they tell her the news
There is no hope
Santa is not real


The author's comments:
I was diagnosed with cancer about a year ago. I'm in remission now, but I still have to go through periodic tests. This is about getting a CT-scan. No, it never actually happened this way.

Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 8 comments.


on Jun. 17 2014 at 10:35 am
EmilytheBelleofA. DIAMOND, Athens, Georgia
81 articles 5 photos 1486 comments

Favorite Quote:
To love is to be vulnerable; Triumph is born out of struggle; We notice shadows most when they stand alone in the midst of overwhelming light.

Poetry is awesome, what do you expect? : ) healing people, also is too

on Jun. 17 2014 at 9:14 am
Canadotas PLATINUM, Harrisonburg, Virginia
24 articles 0 photos 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
“As our circle of knowledge expands, so does the circumference of darkness surrounding it.” --Albert Einstein

Well I'm all for poetry, but that sounds kinda nice too :)

on Jun. 16 2014 at 6:26 pm
EmilytheBelleofA. DIAMOND, Athens, Georgia
81 articles 5 photos 1486 comments

Favorite Quote:
To love is to be vulnerable; Triumph is born out of struggle; We notice shadows most when they stand alone in the midst of overwhelming light.

Thank you, for sharing something that's personal. I write poetry, but I want to study when I go to college and find a cure for cancer.

on Jun. 15 2014 at 1:48 pm
Luv4Ever SILVER, Jacksonville, Florida
7 articles 0 photos 199 comments

Favorite Quote:
A miracle is just another name for hard work
-Minho in "To The Beautiful You"

This is a very deep and emotional piece that I find easy to relate having an illness that can't be solved (however mine isn't cancer)

on Jun. 15 2014 at 5:33 am
August17 BRONZE, Gloucester, Other
4 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In the game of throne, you win, or you die. There is no middle ground." -Petyr Baelish

It is extraordinary. Good work, I think it is your best poem so far. Can't wait for the next one :)

on May. 22 2014 at 11:55 am
JJ_Lone PLATINUM, Davenport, Washington
27 articles 0 photos 73 comments

Favorite Quote:
Look up at the stars and not down at your feet. Try to make sense of what you see, and wonder about what makes the universe exist. Be curious.
~Stephen Hawking

this is really good! ii took me a while then i figured it out. its cancer. am i right? keep on writing! i love you poems!

Dezarae SILVER said...
on May. 22 2014 at 8:45 am
Dezarae SILVER, Wentzville, Missouri
5 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"When your going through hell, keep going."

The emotion displayed here is so raw. The poem would be a little better if you added puncuation but overral it was great. 

Psychedelik said...
on May. 21 2014 at 7:16 pm
Psychedelik, Urbandale, Iowa
0 articles 0 photos 26 comments
Wow!  This is a beautifully written poem.  I love how you wrote about something so personal/emotional for you.