the note | Teen Ink

the note

March 28, 2012
By dragonfly95 SILVER, Argaon, Georgia
dragonfly95 SILVER, Argaon, Georgia
7 articles 0 photos 66 comments

Favorite Quote:
'' there is nothing to fear but fear its self''

Wrote me a note,

Your eyes say you love me,

They say more than the words.

The author's comments:
please comment on this peace, i need feed back.

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This article has 7 comments.

on Jun. 2 2014 at 11:16 am
WOWriting SILVER, Broadstairs, Other
5 articles 0 photos 266 comments
A cute but true piece :) i'm not too into haiku but this is good

so_joy SILVER said...
on Aug. 11 2012 at 9:36 pm
so_joy SILVER, Navesink, New Jersey
8 articles 0 photos 722 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be the change you want to see."

Great! Although this goes against a poet's belief, I think sometimes moments are too special for words.. Great job! Please read, rate, and comment on my poems! Thanks!  

on Apr. 24 2012 at 9:51 am
beautifulspirit PLATINUM, Alpharetta, Georgia
35 articles 0 photos 1398 comments

Favorite Quote:
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
--Eleanor Roosevelt

Maybe the meaning is that our actions speak louder than words---gestures and looks mean more, right? or something along the lines of that?

on Apr. 23 2012 at 11:44 pm
IAmWhoIWantToBe PLATINUM, Manila, Other
41 articles 0 photos 650 comments

Favorite Quote:
‎"I’m learning how to drown out the constant noise that is such an inseparable part of my life. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone. I only have to follow my heart and concentrate on what I want to say to the world: I run my world." - Beyoncé

I like the message of this poem though it's kinda confusing. I think in the first line, you mean write instead of wrote? I'm not sure. Anyway, I do think too that the first line doesn't seem to fit with the second and third line. But the second and third line both have six syllables each. In a haiku, the second should have 7 and the third should have 5 just like the first. Anyway, keep writing and practice more :)))

on Apr. 3 2012 at 9:50 am
i agree. i usually write long poems to get the massage across. i liked your poem; keep writing!!

on Mar. 31 2012 at 6:10 pm
dragonfly95 SILVER, Argaon, Georgia
7 articles 0 photos 66 comments

Favorite Quote:
'' there is nothing to fear but fear its self''

thanks! thanks for the feed back too :)

on Mar. 31 2012 at 5:29 pm
eternal_sunshine SILVER, Minnetonka, Minnesota
8 articles 0 photos 46 comments

Favorite Quote:
Laugh, and the world laughs with you;
Weep, and you weep alone.
For the sad old earth must borrow it's mirth,
But has trouble enough of its own.

I really love the simplicty of this one. It's hard to write so simply without sounding cliche, and I think you did that. Nice job :)