I’m as quiet as a mouse, as swift as a cheetah, as strong as an ox, a master of every known weapon, and I have a nifty British accent. What could possibly go wrong? He thought as he prepared to jump out of the front passenger window of the speeding hummer he had come to love. He only wished his partner Schmingo was a better driver. Considering he isn’t much of a fighter, he had to drive most of the time.
“SCRAPPPPPPPPE!”
“DANG IT SCHMINGO! YOU’RE GONNA SCREW UP THE PAINT!” he yelled.
He was Jeffery. Jeffery the NinjaPirate.
Jumping out of a vehicle was nothing compared to other things he had done in the past. Of course, it’s a little unnerving when the windows aren’t always in line like he had been hoping, due to bad driving. One chance was all he was going to get. He either smashed through that window… or he would break his face on the asphalt… along with everything else. He leaped. The entire freeway seemed to slow down in the moonlight as he hung in the air. He braced himself for the impact he knew he would feel tomorrow. The glass shattered under his weight as he slammed into it at full speed. The truck swerved this way and that as the driver was momentarily stunned by the notion that someone had just jumped through his closed window. I’ve always wanted to know what goes through their minds. What do they think when they see me? Do they see a crazed lunatic? A masked vigilante? Maybe they even think they are dreaming. Come to think of it, most people have never even seen a real ninja or pirate. And I really doubt anyone has even heard of a ninjapirate. Some people laugh at me even. Well at least they do until they are looking down a shotgun barrel. He pushed his curiosity to the side as he dragged the confused drive out of his chair. Idiot… Jeffery thought, if only criminals were smarter these days. He had to think someone would try to stop him from stealing an armored car loaded with money. Admittedly getting past the guards was somewhat impressive, but he must have been worrying about who would come after him. If only people realized that there are much worse things that can come after them than the ones they are scared of. Jeffery slowed the truck down. He punched the windshield and jumped through as broken glass rained down onto him. He propelled himself into the air just as a black hummer sped by. Both disappeared into the night air…. And sirens wailed in the distance.