Two sprinkles of trying hard at the beginning of the semester
A dash of losing more motivation each day
One carton full of not studying for that one hard test
Three acres of talking to your best friend in class
Six moonbeams of never taking notes
Two lifetimes of telling yourself you’ll start studying harder
Three lifetimes of never actually studying harder
One mound of losing all hope

1. Start with two sprinkles of trying hard at the beginning of the semester.

2. Slowly add a dash of losing more motivation each day. This is an important step, and must be followed carefully. You must start slow, mixing thoroughly. Once you have about ¼ of your dash left, pour the rest all in at once.

3. Once the first two steps are complete, leave the mix for about a week. (For best results, pour the night before the test). Then, take the whole carton full of not studying for that one hard test and dump it in fast, making sure to mix heavily.

4. Next, you want to gather three acres of talking to your best friend in class, as well as six moonbeams of never taking notes. In a separate bowl, mix these two ingredients together. You do not need to mix until smooth, because this recipe is best made when lazy.

5. Take both bowls and combine the contents.

6. Next, you must boil the two lifetimes of telling yourself you’ll start studying harder. Once it is at a simmer, pour in the three lifetimes of never actually studying harder.

7. Take the concoction and pour small amounts into the larger bowl.

8. Repeat until you reach two lifetimes of telling yourself you’ll start studying harder, and three lifetimes of never actually studying harder.

9. Finally, once all other steps are completed, place your mix into the oven. Bake on high for a maximum of the whole semester.

10. Once out of the oven, mix until it is light and fluffy. Take a spatula and spread the mound on top of what you have already. Congratulations, you now have a failing grade. For best results, let it sit for a long time, procrastinating on whether or not to eat it.