Through those deep dark hearts lies a mysterious, familiar, glowing figure. Those depths of greed that once used to overshadow kindness takes over. I walk past the dark forest of death, where black leaves scatter the ground, covering what seems to be a red liquid oozing out of the trees and a scattering of objects. 

I see light coming from the center of the forest, eliminating the darkness of the surroundings. The lights seem to blind my eyes and yet I still follow the presence of love. The same love I need but never get, the same love I want but never deserve, and the same love that makes me commit these sins. It feels as if I can’t breathe and I am captivated into this emotion of affection. I can’t see, but hear the breaths of the figure. However, with these breaths, I can also hear the mockery I make of myself in front of them. 

Besides the presence of love, trust and loyalty stand above this emotion. An emotion that makes me want to give up my life for them, an emotion that makes me want to protect them, though I know that wherever I go, this figure will always be forever independent from me. 

This figure I have only seen once, they wore a mask hiding their true identity, but inside their eyes I saw a true angel, unwilling to come forth and show off. Everytime they pass by me, I can feel their presence, but can never come close to them. I feel indebted somehow to them, and it feels like I have failed to save them from all the evil.

I know they may have a dark heart, but are they truly the demon they disguise themselves to be? People told me not to fall for them. People told me that I deserve better. People told me that I should love myself first. 

It's been 7 years and I haven’t given up on this feeling, nor the person. This ignatian of emotion is fueled by them and diffused by them, too. My only friend is my pillow, which catches my tears of frustration and sorrow, but at times, I need love as well. Angel, would you follow me if I am willing to give my existence up for you? Angel, can you hear me? Today marks the day of my death, but I still remain rent free in your brain.