Do you believe in love at first sight? I do. I know it’s silly to think that at just one glance you can fall completely head over heels for someone, but it’s the truth. I didn’t used to believe it, not until I experienced it first hand. I grew up in the wonderful State of New Jersey. When I turned 19 I moved to New York, to study at New York University. I brought everything with me when I moved down to the “Big Apple”, everything except for one devastating memory. My name is Elizabeth Jones, and this is my diary:

ELIZABETH JONES: DIARY

June 15th 1987-9:00 pm:
A new family just rolled in to town and moved three doors down from us. I’ve never had an interest in meeting new people; I mean I’m quiet and love my privacy. I especially hate being bothered by annoying neighbors. Mother better not make me meet them…I might puke.
June 17th 1987-7:37 pm:
Sorry it’s been so long since my last entry. It’s been 3 days since the newbie’s moved into our neighborhood. They insisted on coming over to introduce themselves today. Mother practically had to pull me by my ear to get me down the stairs to meet them, but thank goodness she did. As I stood at the bottom of my stairs, hair rolled up on top of my head wearing nothing but my tiny exercise shorts and an oversized sweater, I looked out the front door and stood directly in front of my new obsession, Brayden Carmichael. I swear it was love at first sight. After the Carmichael’s left I came straight back to my room. I stared at myself in the mirror for what felt like years. I practically felt guilty for making such a divine human being look at me for almost a full hour. I was so embarrassed, how could such a drab boring girl ever even dream of getting such an A-class guy? Perfect solution: I’ll just have to stay clear of the love of my life; it would only hurt me more to see him.
11:15 pm:
Brayden Carmichael is my future husband and I just can’t get him out of my mind. He had the body of a Greek god, hair silky and smooth, and a face you could mistake for Tom Cruise. I stood face to face with him, jaw dropped and drool practically poured out of my mouth when he first walked inn. The whole time he was over, I trailed behind him like a lovesick puppy. Just being in his presence caused my heart to beat faster then ever, and my stomach to completely drop.
July 12th 1987-12:34 am:

Today has been pretty exciting so far. I woke up at 9:30 and ate breakfast within 3 seconds of that. After breakfast I took a shower and played Tetris for about…two hours? Mother eventually forced me to go grocery shopping with her. I know it doesn’t sound that exciting, but listen to this, at the grocery store we bumped into Brayden and his mom! It was super awkward but at least I got to see Brayden in real life, not like how I usually see him which is out of my binoculars from my bedroom window. Creep? Just a bit… its what love does to you I guess.
August 24th 1987-10:45 pm:

I’m a sucker I know. I have barely written anything all summer. The reason is I’ve been sleeping for most of it, and when I’m not asleep I’m wallowing in boredom and misery. I know people aren’t supposed to feel sorry for themselves, but I can’t help it. How am I supposed to feel, I’m a 16-year-old girl with not a single close friend, a nagging mother and has been stalking a boy for almost two months. You don’t get much sadder then that.

September 8th 1987- 4:00 pm:
First day of 11th grade, and already I’m drowning in work, I’m sensing a good year coming…not. Well as you know I’ve done a great job staying clear of Brayden through out the summer (not including when I watched him through my bedroom window). At first I was hoping to find a new boy at school to get my mind off of Brayden, even though I new that was close to impossible (to get over Brayden and get a guy to like me). As I opened my creaking dusty locker before homeroom, I heard a familiar voice, and discovered my new locker buddy. None other then Brayden Carmichael, only I would be struck with such luck. To my surprise the sex-god actually spoke to me:
“Your that Jones girl right?”
That’s all he really had to say for my heart to skip two beats. For the duration of our small conversation I was pretty smooth and happy with myself that I didn’t make it completely obvious I was picturing him naked through out the whole thing.
September 10th 1987-12:00 pm:

I can’t sleep, and I have a math test first period, great. Considering math isn’t my best subject and this test determines my pass or fail you think I would take it more seriously. I defiantly need to get more motivated.
October 6th 1987-5:55 pm:
Brayden and I are practically best friends now. Not only do we share a locker (which is way more intimate then you think) but also we walk together to and from school. I’ve finally lost my lack of confidence and am beginning to feel 100% comfortable in my own skin.
October 17th 1987- 7:30 pm:
Wendy Napes. A name that made my skin crawl every time I heard it. She was a walking and talking Barbie, and I couldn’t stand her. It never crossed my mind that such an intelligent, down-to-earth guy like Brayden would ever be interested in a bimbo like her. Shows just how stupid I really am. Brayden and I were walking home from school yesterday when he told me the amazing news. He was going to Wendy’s house later that night to do a “chemistry project”. If Chemistry meant hook up then it made complete sense. That little rat was stealing my best friend, and future husband and I am pretty much devastated about it.
October 21st 1987-4:35 pm:
God was on my side this weekend. I asked Brayden about his hot date today on our walk home from school.

“Oh Napes? Nah, she’s cool and all just a little to strong and pushy for my liking, I’m into more subtle chicks.”
That was his response. So I may completely be over thinking this, but does that sound like a hint? Could he ever want me, I mean obviously not as much as I wanted him, but it’s still a nice thought! Before I completely get carried away I better get my English essay done, while I can still somewhat concentrate.
October 31st 1987-4:10 pm:
Ok, Ok, Ok, so I’m in the midst of having a freak out. Brayden and I got paired for an English presentation on the Canadian novel “Fugitive Pieces” and he is coming over…TONIGHT! So I just put make up on for like the second time in my life and it looks awful. My hair is straight and pulled half up with my bangs hanging loose. Now, what to wear? He said he liked down to earth right? Maybe I’ll pull out the leggings and my grey top? That’s screaming, “ I’m not trying to hard but feel free to pounce at any time”. Perfect. PS-Happy Halloween!
12:56 am:

A first kiss is something to be cherished for your entire life; it is spontaneous yet romantic at the same time, or at least mine was. To be in grade 11 and to only have just had your first kiss isn’t the coolest thing, but when it’s with a boy you are totally infatuated with (like I am) it feels like nothing in the world could be cooler. Brayden was my kiss; he is the one that I will tell my children about, sorry, our children.
November 7th - 5:17 pm:

It’s been a week since “the kiss” and Brayden hasn’t acted any differently towards me. I mean I wasn’t expecting an engagement or anything but still. Maybe I just need to relax, I know that relationships take time, and I’m willing to wait as long as it takes.
December 15th 1987- 11:30 am:

Math exam this afternoon, other then the fact that I am not at all prepared, should be a fun day. Wish me luck! (Oh and Brayden and I are walking to school together ☺)
December 23rd 1987- 1:46 pm:
I took the plunge; I confessed my love for Brayden to my mother. Take my advice and NEVER get parents involved in your love life. I’m pretty sure for an hour all I heard was “sweetie, that is precious, do we need to have “the talk”, I think we should.” After abut half an hour of that I stopped responding and just let her ramble for another half hour. The worst part of the whole thing? After we talked she came and gave me a hug and whispered in my ear “ Lizzy dear, I hope your not having sex…and if you’re experimenting, daddy’s condoms are in his dresser drawer.” Ok so I think we can all safely say that that last sentence was completely, totally, and utterly unnecessary.
December 24th 1987- 7:54 pm:
I’m pretty sure I wet my pants out of happiness today. Brayden asked me to be…HIS GIRLFRIEND! I think I’m going to blast some Madonna and do a little victory dance in my room, I think its appropriate right about now.


8 months and 4 days later…
September 12th 1988-9:35 pm:
My grade 12 year has gotten off to a great start. Brayden and I are still dating; and are planning on applying for all the same universities. I have never been so happy to be with someone in my life. When Brayden and me are together I feel as if nothing else matters, everything is just completely…perfect.
October 16th 1988- 10:11 pm:

Brayden is the cutest boy I have ever met. Last night for dinner he set us up a beautiful picnic in his backyard. As I walked outside, there was a table set up with candles, roses and my favorite song playing in the background. As cheesy as the night sounds, it brought tears to my eyes. I think the reason I appreciated it so much was because for the first time, I actually felt loved.
November 14th 1988 1:13 am:
10 movies, 20 dinner dates, 6 sleepovers, and over 200 kisses, each one feeling like the first went by before Brayden told me. He started off with an “I love you”, and automatically I knew something was wrong. It took me 5 minutes to get what he wanted to tell me out of him. Osterosarcomas cancer. The second the word cancer fell from Brayden’s lips tears came out of my eyes faster then anything. The whole conversation is a blur. I had to ask what Osterosarcoma meant; it ended up being a severe bone cancer that is common in young boys. I was hoping he would eventually give me some good news, like they found it early or it wasn’t anything serious. Of course that wasn’t the case. The cancer had started in his left knee and spread through to bones all over his body. My neighbor, best friend and love of my life was dying, right before my eyes.
December 19th 1988-11:11 pm:

It’s 11:11, make a wish: I wish that my boyfriend would grow back his hair, grow back his strength, and grow back his health. Brayden started loosing his hair weeks after the chemotherapy and is completely bald now. He can barely walk and despite the devastation I feel when I am around him, I stay by his side…everyday and all day.
January 3rd 1989- 12:50 am:

New Years this year was not a happy one. To celebrate the coming of 1989 I sat in a hospital feeding my boyfriend jello, and he hates jello…
January 13th 1989-2:45 am:

Brayden died. I don’t know how to react; I have never experienced a loss like this. Brayden was my prince, my reason for waking up in the morning, and my first hand experience of love at first sight.



January 13th was my last diary entry. The rest of that year, and the year following I lead a depressed life and found no reason to do anything. Brayden was my life and I was nothing without him. It took a year and a half for me to realize I couldn’t live in the rut I was living in anymore. That was the year I applied for NYU, Brayden’s dream school. I went for him.

“ What is love at first sight but the response of a soul crying out with sudden regret because it realizes that it has never before been recognized.” This quote is taken from the book Fugitive Pieces, the book Brayden and I did our project on. This quote is the definition of my feelings for Brayden Carmichael. My soul was un-recognized for many years; I lead an anti-social life and never gave any one a chance, leaving it impossible for anyone to give me one. Falling in love with Brayden gave me the courage to set my soul free. As much as I regret living so many years un-noticed, I will never regret the love I felt for Brayden.

The End