The Three Little Pigs?
After Little Red Riding hood found out that I was pretending to be her grandmother, I felt ashamed. I mean, what kind of a wolf is defeated by a ten year old girl wearing some stupid cape? I am such a loser. I have been walking on this trail for hours now and I'm not even sure that I know who I am anymore. So here I am, being the saddest little wolf in the world, then I saw it. There was a little pig farther up the trail and he was buying... straw? I became so intrigued, so I followed him home.
It seemed like I had been following him for hours! I was getting so anxious! Finally, he stopped, only we weren't at a house! To my disbelief, he sat his straw down and began building a house with it! What an idiot! This as going to be too easy.
He finished his lopsided house and I made my move. I knocked on his door. No answer. I knocked again. No answer. "Little pig little pig, won't you let me come in?" I said with a grin. No answer.
“Fine then. I guess I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow your house in!” I blew as hard as I could and the house collapsed. I was fully prepared to eat my meal, but there was no pig in sight! There lay a note in the pile of straw that read:
“Gone to my brother’s! Be back later!”
Furious, I made my way to the brother’s house. I mean, I deserve two pigs because of my wait. I approached the house, and to my amazement, this house was made of sticks. These pigs are so ignorant, I wish I made it up! I knocked on the door.
“Little pigs, little pigs, won’t you let me come in?” I bellowed. No answer.
“Fine, I guess I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow your house in!”. I blew as hard as I could and the sticks collapsed. To my amazement, again, the pigs were gone again! There lay a note on the rubble that read:
“We went to brother’s! Be back later!”
By now i'm itching to get at least one of the pigs, so I go to the brother’s house. The house is made of bricks.  How am I going to blow this one down? So I thought for a moment. Why don’t I do what I do best? So, I walked to the pigs’ mother’s house. I knocked on the door.
“Mother pig, Mother pig, won’t you let me come in?” I hollered.
“Why sure!” a friendly voice answered. I entered her house and once she realized I was the Big Bad Wolf, I attacked her then put on her clothes. This plan is sure to work!
I walked back down to the third pig’s home and knocked on the door.
“Little pigs, Little pigs, won’t you let me come in?” I said in their mother’s voice. The pigs were excited to see their mother and embraced me with a hug. I took off their mother’s clothes and to their surprise, I was actually the Big Bad Wolf. I attacked all of the pigs and I had a fantastic meal. Then, I lived happily ever after.