The following evidence was recovered from a NAND model memory chip originating from an iPhone 8 at Site 29, the crash site of Delta Airlines Flight 353. Forensic testing suggests it was written in the Notes application beginning at 8:44 PM CST, when technical problems were first reported by Captain Grant, and ending at 8:53 PM CST, the recorded time of impact. The device has been identified as belonging to [redacted] Li, a student at [redacted] University. 

[BEGIN] 

Shane. 

You told me to “fly safe” when we hugged goodbye at the airport in Boston. That was three hours ago. Three hours since I heard your voice and felt your old flannel on my hands. Three hours since you made a joke about my height and told me to say hello to my dog for you in the same breath. 

I want to go back there. 

There’s something wrong with the plane, Shane. It’s rattling, and the flight attendants all look like they’re about to throw up. They keep whispering to themselves. One of them went into the bathroom and hasn’t come back out. Another one can’t stop shaking.

They won’t tell us anything, but I know it’s bad. 

My god, the turbulence is bad now. People are starting to get worried. The lady next to me won’t let go of her daughter. We’re scared, Shane. I hope it’s nothing. Please, let it be just wind. 

Okay, there’s a voice over the intercom. It’s the captain speaking. We’ll be making an emergency landing due to mechanical problems. Nothing to worry about. Sit tight, he says. He sounds scared. 

If something happens, Shane, I want you to know something. I don’t want to cross any lines, since I know how much you love Ruby. I know you want to marry her someday. And I’m happy for you, really I am. 

But I need to get this off my chest or I’m going to be p*ssed. No way am I dying in a plane crash without sharing this to someone. 

God, even typing it out is scary. It might be more scary than this deathtrap I’m in. I wish that I could just say it out loud to you. At least then I wouldn’t have to think about it. I’ve done too much of that already. 

The daughter is crying now. Another kid, maybe two or three rows back, is crying too. Why did this have to happen to them? 

Honestly, why did this have to happen to me? Did I step on too many ants as a kid? Did I offend God when I stopped going to church on Sundays? 

I guess it won’t help thinking about it now. There’s more rattling. People are asking what’s going on. People are asking when we’re going to land. 

I don’t think we’re going to land, Shane. That’s why I want to tell you this. 

I’ve wanted to tell you this for years now. Since we’ve first met, even. But you’ve always been with her. And I’ve been okay with that. Ruby is great. Her smile is so bright and her laughter is infectious and she’s beautiful. She’s my friend. 

That’s why it hurts to type this out. But maybe it’s okay. I might be dead in ten minutes, and it’s not like this’ll be published anywhere. The secret will die with me and you can marry Ruby and have 2.5 kids and a house and a cat. 

Or maybe I’m being dramatic. Maybe we’ll be okay and I’m making everything up. Honestly, I’ll probably end up deleting this once we land and think about it whenever I’m feeling particularly masochistic. 

There’s weird noises coming from underneath the plane. Or maybe it’s inside the plane. I don’t know. I feel like crying. There’s enough people around me doing that that I won’t feel weird. 

Oh my god, we’re falling. Shane, we’re falling. Oh my god, what was that noise? I wish you were here. I don’t know how much time I have left. There’s screaming. Oh god those mask things just dropped oh my god shane oh my god 

shane i’m sorry i never told you this i should’ve i’m sorry please forgive me please remember me please please remember our movie nights and our fights over basketball and our trips to the pool hall please i’m sorry 

i love y

[END]