I got up and walked out of the lunchroom as fast as I could with Ryan and Lizzie trailing behind me trying to catch up. Oh, I hate her so much I wish she could just crawl in a hole and...
Then Ryan grabbed my arm and said, “Hey listen I am sorry for what Taylor did. Are you alright?”
“I’m fine. I’ll do what I was volunteered to do and then it will be done and over with,” I assured him painfully.
“Are you sure you are alright with everything?” Lizzie asked sympathetically.
I looked from Ryan to Lizzie put on a big fake smile and lied, “I am positive, let’s just go to band.”
“Alright let’s go,” Lizzie said defeated. Altogether, we silently walked up the hall and down to the basement to the band room. Ryan took his seat next to mine with his tenor saxophone, Lizzie sat behind him with her trumpet, and I had my alto saxophone. Playing my sax calmed me greatly. It was a way to forget about everything bad that happened. The three of us sat there in the middle of the large white and gray room. I felt uncomfortable with my two friends for the first time ever. What happened in the lunchroom screwed up my whole evening, and probably my whole high school career. I know it seems like I’m making a mountain out of a mole hill, but if you knew how mean Taylor was and how obnoxious Nikki was, you would understand my pain. But, sadly anymore I feel as if no one will ever understand me.
As soon as Mr. P the instructor walked in, we started practicing for the new calendar year concert. All together, we would play three songs or pieces. The theme was Broadway musicals. We were going to play You Can’t Stop the Beat from Hairspray, Shall We Dance from the King and I, and I Just Can’t Wait to be King from the Lion King.
As we sat there and practiced, I started thinking hard again. Does Ryan really like me? Why would he want to hang out with me more than his own girlfriend? I finally concluded that all boys felt awkward around any girl and they had no clue what they truly wanted. Today, band was horrible. I couldn’t stop thinking about what happened in lunch. The scene played over and over again in my head like a broken VCR would keep rewinding one spot on a video tape over and over again. I usually liked band because the teacher, Mr. P., cracked jokes, made us laugh, and let us talk when we weren’t playing, that is if what he was doing did not pertain to us. I sat that looking solemn. I wanted to leave because being surrounded by so much cheerfulness and mirth. I was so very happy when the bell rang. I ran to my case, shoved my sax inside my instrument locker, and practically ran to Home Ec.
Last block was the only class today that seemed to fly by because we always have so much fun. Sometimes we cook, or sew, or work on interior design in Home Economics. When the bell rang, I ran to my locker, got my stuff, said bye to everyone, and waited at the front doors. I couldn’t wait to leave this place for a whole weekend. I waited there for Ryan so we could walk home like we always did. As I was waiting, I saw Nikki walking down the hallway struggling with her two bags and stack of books. As she drew nearer out of nowhere a guy walked by Nikki and tripped her. I tried so hard to hold in a laugh, as I walked up to her to help her. I bent over, picked up her various papers, books, and noticed she had pictures and they were all of Max. I thought to myself, Nikki had a crush on Max. Oh my God, should I tell him? I would in good time.
She thanked me then was about to say something else when I cut her off by saying, “All of us are going to come to your party. That is all of the people that were at my table.” Nikki looked stunned; no one had ever cut her off before. Well cut her off and said something nice at least.
She gathered herself and said, “Oh…my party…you are all going to come? Okay no problem. See you tomorrow. I think I see my mom out there I got to go, bye.”
“Bye Nikki,” I managed to mutter as she waddled out of the doors and hopped down the steps into her mom’s old sky blue minivan. I turned around and sure enough, there was Ryan basically strutting down the hallway like it was a runway during the New York Fashion Week, saying bye to everyone. I thought to myself, oh how hot he looks in his baggy dark blue jeans, the top of his red striped underwear peeking out. He had on a red Hollister shirt with an American eagle sweatshirt over it. And on his head over his thick curly hair he had a knit black skull cap on. On his feet were his white and red DC sneakers. As he got closer and closer I could smell his Axe cologne, I loved the smell of Axe. It was so intoxicating. Once its scent reached my nostrils, I could feel it swell inside and give me a tingling sensation all over because my body knew who was nearby. When Ryan got to me he was going to say something, his mouth open, when Taylor came right between us bumped me back with her butt, and kissed Ryan for almost a whole minute. Taylor looked like she was trying to swallow Ryan’s head whole. I stood behind them holding back tears and keeping a lump the size of an apple down in my throat. Tears were swelling in my eyes, I felt like running out the doors, down the street all the way to my house. But I knew I couldn’t, I had to stay and endure this torture. I figured if I put up with this charade for long enough, I could earn extra karma points and have Ryan for as long as I want. How long could two people stay together especially when they have nothing in common? They were only sophomores; they couldn’t have gone very far in their relationship.
When Taylor was done, she turned to me and flashed a devilish smile. I stared harshly backed. Ryan didn’t seem to notice. He was probably light headed from that ambush Taylor pulled off.
As soon as Ryan pulled himself together he asked, “So, are you ready to go?”
Gritting my teeth and holding down my jealousy I said good-bye to Taylor and told Ryan, “Yeah let’s get out of this place."




3. A Walk to Forget
We opened the big glass doors and stepped outside, I took in the sight of the nice winter afternoon. The sky was gray and thick clouds covered the sun so you could faintly see it. The walkway, streets, and most of the sidewalks were visible and wet. Ryan and I walked in the street so our feet wouldn’t get too wet, like they would if we walked on the parts of the sidewalk that did have snow on it.
When we reached the round about where McKinley Pkwy branched off, Ryan asked me a serious question, “What do you think of Taylor? I mean we have been going out for a whole month now…”
“Well,” I said, “She’s alright you know if you like the snobby, rich, girly girls.”
“Oh, oh do I hear a little tone of Taylor bashing in your voice?”
“Well kind of, I mean I guess it is just Taylor. I mean me and her used to be friends since we were 3 until 8th grade… why do you even care what I think of her?”
“I care about your opinion because you and I are really close and good friends.”
“Awww… how sweet…thanks well now you know how I feel.”
“So is there anything else on your mind?” he asked thoughtfully. I wanted to scream yes! There is so much more I want to tell you. There are just too many things in the way right now, especially Taylor.
“No,” I blurted out without choosing my words more carefully, “Why, is there something on your mind?” His face grew solemn, he didn’t want to say anything, I could tell. We were silent for a while until Ryan broke the silence again.
“So, how has everything else been?”
“Good. Everything is just as normal as ever.”
“That’s good, so how about that Sabres team.”
“They could be doing better. I know they have the potential.”
“Give them time. They’ll burst out of their shell soon enough.”
“Yeah how is your mom?”
“Good, I guess. Her job at the mall isn’t doing her much good though.”
“Maybe she could get a job at the hospital. Didn’t she go to college to become a nurse?”
“That is great idea. I’ll be sure to mention it. Could you help me with something?
I stared at Ryan’s serious expression. I really hoped it wasn’t another personal opinion question, I always blurt the truth out without even thinking.
“It’s not that bad, I promise. I need a girl’s advice,” he said sensing my uneasiness.
Oh great, he’s gonna ask me if what he got Taylor is alright…I know it. I nodded for him to continue.
“Well…” he started out choosing his words carefully, “My friend is the one that needs advice actually. He has a girlfriend…”
I looked at him. He was bluffing! His expression was so easily readable. Ryan was the one that needed advice, not his so-called friend. I played along anyway. Hurting Ryan’s feelings was high on my to do list.
“Go on…” I encouraged.
“Well my friend…Jack isn’t sure he really likes his girlfriend. Jack isn’t sure if he should break up with his girlfriend or not…so I guess what I, I mean Jack wants to know what he should do with his not so likeable girlfriend.”
I pondered on his question for a good amount of time. I hope this doesn’t count as interfering with destiny, but I couldn’t just sit back and torture Ryan…could I. No that will mess up my good karma.
“Well in my opinion Jack should think long and hard about this girl. If he doesn’t really seem that close or interested, then Jack should probably break up with the girl before they get too close and he hurts her feelings,” I said with confidence.
“Hmm, now is that Evil Emma or Sweet Emma giving that advice?”
The Controlled Emma, I felt like saying, but that would leave him asking more questions. “The Logical Emma,” I said casually.
“I didn’t know there was an intelligent one of you,” he joked.
I rolled my eyes. To my amazement, we were already at the corner of Hollywood and McKinley. In an odd way, I couldn’t wait to get away from Ryan. Usually I want to stay with Ryan and never stop talking. Today is a bit different, it’s a bit awkward.
“It looks like we are here,” Ryan said with a bit of depression in his voice.
“Yeah I guess I’ll see you, don’t forget six o’clock,” I said. I turned and ran up my driveway and up the walkway into my house. Ryan lived right across the street and Lizzie lived at the other end of the block. I lived on Hollywood Ave. The street is about six blocks away from school, which has an address at Red Jacket Parkway. My street is just like every other one in the neighborhood. Most of the houses look the same; have similar sized lawns, driveways, etc.
My house looked like all the others too. It was average, but grand in its own special way. One reason being it has been my home since I was born. I walked up the short driveway to the front porch. It wasn’t big but it was still where I liked to hang out. Hesitantly I walked to the big oak door. I twisted the brass knob, but hesitated. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go in and wait to be with Ryan, or turn around and be with Ryan and tell him how I feel. There was really no choice though. Ryan had Taylor and I had no one. It was just a fact that I had to bare.
Before Ryan walked into his house, he yelled to me, “Six o’clock it’s a date!” As I opened the big brown oak door, I heard my 6-month-old baby sister, Drew, crying. I looked over and she was in her swing balling her eyes out. I put my bag down right by the door, threw off my shoes, and went over to take care of Drew. Drew was the sweetest baby girl in the world. She had little pieces of dark curly hair on her head and the biggest, roundest hazel eyes I have ever seen. I took her out of her swing and went upstairs to find my little brother and mom. I reached the top of the stairs when I heard the sound of my mom crying. I turned left in the hallway and opened the door to my little brother’s room and there little Zac was playing and making noises.
“Hey Zac, what are you doing?” I asked him.
“I jus' pwayin’ wif Queso,” Zac said. Zac was a spunky little four-year old with a heart full of gold. He had long, straight, dirty blond hair with hazel eyes. Zac loves his stuffed green mouse that he called Queso. Queso was mine when I was little, but I had called her Bumble.
“Where is mommy?” I asked him.
“She in her room cwyin.”
“Okay, come on let’s go see mommy. Follow me please.” I told him. With Drew in my arms and Zac by my side, we walked across the hall into my mom and dad’s bedroom. I slowly opened the door and saw my mom lying on her bed with tears in her eyes.