My body reverberates with anxious energy. The air never felt purer slipping and burning it's way down my throat. Long exhale. I'm ready for it.
My hands tremble over the thousand some pounds of incredible red steel.
I've never wanted anything more in my life; my heart beats for it, my eyes summon it, my fingers will it to take me and shake my insides, my body glides over the cool leather and positions itself.
I shut off my brain and replace it with the pure desire crashing recklessly through my veins as I soon would be doing behind the wheel. The car rumbles to life and I sit and seep into the seats. I close my eyes and vibrate for a minute. Then: VRRRRRRRR VRRRRRROOOM! I preass my foot to the gas, eyes still closed, and the engine screams! An odd sort of sting breathes life into my skin and for the first time in my life I feel, in every way imaginable, alive.
My heart thumps to the beat of the power of the car.
Thump...thump...drive...drive...fast...faster.
I'm cruising the freeway and I've let the top glide down. Exposing myself to the sun, the wind, and other harsh elements. The breeze caresses every stand of my hair generously and I close my eyes against the world and let the other senses take control. To let my mind wander along with my hands on the wheel.
I open my eyes at the scent of burnt rubber to find myself three feet in the next lane...going ninety. This rises a balloon of energy that comes out in a giggle as I swerve back, ignoring the angry honks and jeers.
Giggles turn into laughs as I break one hundred, feeling free, only to be retched back by flashing red and blue lights.
No! Keep driving! My burning desire tells me, but I decide to use my brain instead and pull collectively to the side of the road.
The officer sidles up to the side of the car and leans in, "Do you have any idea how fast you were going?"
Two options: say something clever and work a million hours overtime to pay for the ticket or portray innocence.
"Well, no, officer. You see, I was on my way to a meeting and I was running late." I lean over, look him widely and naively in the eye, and twirl my hair. "I must have sped up without realizing it."
Yes! Big Smile! Big Smile for a big finish!
"Well, okay, but don't let it happen again, alright?"
I knod regretfully, "I understand officer."
"Okay, you're free to go."
He retreats back to his gullible little world thinking he had some kind of impact on the world and I'm "free to go." Free to go wherever my little heart takes me. Free to go on in a reckless blur. Free to, inevitably, crash and burn.