Diary of a Psycho - Silenced 8/12/11 | Teen Ink

Diary of a Psycho - Silenced 8/12/11

October 15, 2011
By Anonymous_Me DIAMOND, Marble Hill, Missouri
Anonymous_Me DIAMOND, Marble Hill, Missouri
54 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is but a walking shadow."






~Shakespeare (Macbeth)


Oh, Alisa.
What am I going to do with you?
You blurt out ALL your secrets, but somehow make people believe they're mine and not yours.
Hm.
Well, that's perfectly fine with me - sort of - because now I know everything about you that you never wanted me to know.
HAH!
IN YOUR FACE!
That is your face, right?
XD
Anyways, now that I've made that point, I wanted to write about just the other day, when you got out of ISS only because it's a new quarter and your 50 pounds of missing late work doesn't matter anymore.
Well, to start off with, I handed you that letter I wrote, the one that took me two hours to write? I was really trying to come up with every single little thing you've done to make me upset to get my point across - that I don't want anything to do with you.
It was kinda like the Declaration of Independence. A Preamble, a List Of Grievances, and a conclusion. Oh, and a variation of the Declaration of Natural Rights - I told you why these ''grievances'' were wrong and WHY I was upset about them. Though you should know - you're the one who's caused all the trouble.
But would you read it?
Oh, no, you tore it up and THREW IT AWAY.
Apparently, you don't want anything to do with me, either.
Well, good.

Later, when I was going to 5th hour, I pointed out to Airianna how at lunch, she was sitting on both Amber AND Brendon's lap.
Yep, that's right.
Then Amber got up, and Kandyce took her place, and Alisa sat on her, too. Her arm was slung over Kandyce's shoulder (and it was just the same with Amber until she got up) and touching her boob.
Ew. Slut.
While her other hand was crawling around Brendon, searching for something, anything, to grab.
EW EW EW EW.
That's even MORE disgusting!
EW!
And Alisa overheard me telling Airianna this, and she said, ''And this is coming from the girl who made out with Airianna.''
Kandyce, whose locker is right in between ours, stopped what she was doing and stared at me.
Alisa is lucky Kandyce was in the way, otherwise I would've taken the contents of my locker and thrown them at her. Hopefully that would've given her a concussion, but now I'll never know.
''Excuse me?'' I hissed, putting as much hate and venom in my voice as possible.
''Did you not hear me clearly enough?'' she asked sweetly. ''I said, COMING FROM THE GIRL WHO - '' (the entire hallway started whispering and pointing right then) ''-MADE OUT WITH AIRIANNA!!!''
Dead silence.
I mean, complete silence.
It was freaky.
VERY freaky.
The blonde Austin broke the extremely awkward silence by shouting, ''I TOLD you guys she's a Satanist!!! I TOLD you so!!!''
That was too much. They all crossed the line right then.
And I wasn't about to react to it calmly. I would fight back.
But I knew, if I fought hack, they WOULD believe I made out with Airianna and that I'm a Satanist (which is just the most retarded/stupid thing I've ever heard).
Oh, who cares? They all hate me anyways.
I moved to the middle of the hallway, and people practically flew backwards to avoid touching me. As a result, I was in the middle of what looked like a dance circle.
Well, perfectly fine with me. Now people know who's being hurt here.
''I have a question to ask.'' My voice rang out in the hallway, perfectly level and soft.
''What?'' Sydney spat.
Well, I thought, another one of the supposedly nice people hates me. No surprise there.
''What is WRONG with you people?!'' I roared. ''How DARE you spread f*** LIES about me?! Christians should know it's wrong, and I know most of you ARE Christian. You know that lying is wrong. Well, if you want the freak, look at her!''
I pointed an angry finger at Alisa, and my gaze traveled down that shaking finger as my vision narrowed to that one person.
''She's the one telling everyone lies about me. She's the one who told Austin I'm a Satanist, which is the STUPIDEST thing I have EVER heard. Just because I don't read the Bible and go to Church every Sunday doesn't mean I worship the devil.
''And SHE has been telling everyone her secrets. You just never thought they were hers, because she wants you to believe they're mine. Well, THEY'RE NOT! She's the one who made out with Airianna, SHE'S the one who cuddles with Amber, SHE'S the one whose pillow functions as Amber, Airianna, Brendon, and both Zach AND Zack.''
I stepped toward Alisa, who was smiling smugly with her hands on her hips.
''Well, do you really think they're going to believe you? After all, I'm the one who's had a boyfriend before.'' She swerved her head like a snake, totally convinced that was a good reason.
''Okay, what the H*** does THAT have to do with anything? That's NOT my fault. If none of the guys choose to like me - or if they do and I don't like them back - that's THEIR problem. What kind of a stupid reason is THAT?!''
Harley (the guy one) whispered something to short Austin, who laughed. Taller and blonde Austin gave Austin a look that asked, ''What?'' And whatever Harley had just whispered, now two other people knew.
I whipped around and pointed at them. ''See? THAT'S what I'm talking about right there. Spreading lies.''
''Actually, it's not a lie,'' Harley said. ''I said you're probably not a virgin.''
Austin and Austin cracked up laughing.
I did a facepalm.
''Well, I AM and even if I WASN'T, that nobody's business and it has NOTHING to do with this.'' I sighed in frustration.
''Actually, what I really said is that Alisa's reason made her look like an idiot,'' Harley clarified.
I shook my head.
''I'm sick and tired of this,' I said.
And I turned to Alisa, who was wearing a look of bewilderment. ''How was that NOT a good reason?'' she asked. ''I mean, I've had boys like me before, doesn't that make me better than her?''
I sighed. ''It's no wonder you were in ISS - I'm surprised with THAT logic, you aren't still in second grade.'' I gripped my Health book tightly.
''I'm sure you're in very much emotional pain right now, so to make you feel better, perhaps...''
THWACK, went my Health book as it smacked into her head.

---Kristen


The author's comments:
No, I didn't really hit her - it's insanely dramatized. It would have to be...

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