A Dark Night | Teen Ink

A Dark Night

April 12, 2013
By Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes


I sat alone in my parents' house, staring at the knife in my hands. I had six long, pink scars that stretched across my forearms. I wished that every cut had done what Elizabeth had said what they would do. "It will all do away." She had promised. "All of the problems wash out with the blood." Elizabeth had been wrong.

I heard somebody knock at the door. I put the knife down on the kitchen counter carefully, and walked into the living room. I opened the dark, heavy oak door with it's golden doorknob. A girl was standing on my doorstep. She was wearing baggy jeans and a red sweater that was about three sizes too big. She had long, thick brown hair and warm brown eyes that were full of tears. Lightning flashed and thunder boomed.
"May I came in?" Gabrielle Vince, probably the cutest girl I had ever seen, asked.
"Ummmm....." My parents weren't home, so I would get into tons of trouble if they came home and Gabrielle was here.
"Come on in."

Gabrielle and I sat on opposite sides of the wide couch. I had made us both a cup of tea, using this as an opportunity to hide the knife.
"What happened to your arms?" Gabrielle asked.
I felt pure terror run down my spine. This was the first time that I hadn't had long sleeves on. Tears began to well up in my eyes and threatened to stream down my face.
"Nick?" Gabrielle asked, her own tears forgotten. She moved closer to me. "Are you okay?"
"I cut myself." The words barely came out, and when they did, it was in a hollow, raspy whisper. The tears in my eyes seemed to fade. I expected Gabrielle to recoil, to run away from me. But she didn't. Instead, she moved even closer to me and put her hand on my shoulder.
"It's okay." She told me. "I know what you did."
I looked up at her, bewildered.
"I've seen you do it." She told me simply. And then she did the last thing that I ever expected her to do, and the thing that I had wanted her to do so badly. Gabrielle kissed me on the lips. I wrapped my arms around her and she did the same. She broke away and curled up against me. She put her head on my chest. "I love you." She murmured. "I just wish that I was brave enough to say it to you before."
"This time, I know what you mean." I told her, our tears forgotten together.



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This article has 32 comments.


on Aug. 17 2013 at 9:19 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

A Dark Night (Parts One & Two). They're both on my page.

on Aug. 17 2013 at 9:19 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

A Dark Night (Part One) and A DArk Night (Part Two). They are both on my page.

on Aug. 17 2013 at 11:23 am
nelehjr DIAMOND, Lingle, Wyoming
60 articles 11 photos 379 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

No, I did not know you rewrote this. What's it called?

on Aug. 15 2013 at 12:16 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

Thanks. You know, I re-wrote this.

on Jul. 31 2013 at 3:17 pm
nelehjr DIAMOND, Lingle, Wyoming
60 articles 11 photos 379 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

This is great! But I feel as if you've dropped us right in the middle of the story and not left us (the readers I mean) an ending. Dropping your reader in the middle of the story is a great begining but it's also a tough way to write. Why is Nick cutting himself? Who is Elizabeth? How long has he know Gabrielle? Your writing has great potential but it just feels incomplete. Try adding on to this please, and then I will read, rate and comment once more. :)

on May. 31 2013 at 6:08 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

Thank you!

on May. 31 2013 at 5:48 pm
Melissa23 SILVER, Irondale, Alabama
5 articles 0 photos 22 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity." - 1 Timothy 4:12

This is the first one of your stories I have read and I enjoyed it so much I think I might read the other ones! Good work!

on May. 27 2013 at 12:43 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

Thank you! I'm glad you liked it.

on May. 27 2013 at 11:24 am
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

Hello! So you already know I read 'A Dark Night II (Parts one and two)' and I really enjoyed reading it. Coming here and reading this one was really nice too. It was refreshing to see some similarities from both and to see the differences. I like the simplicity of this one a lot, though it was short you still got the story in here as a whole and it was nice. I felt there was more emotion in this scence than in the Dark Night II (part two) scene. Maybe Nick's emotions were more obvious and vulnerable in this one than in the other. But, I enjoyed both stories and thought it was fun comparing and contrasting. You did a great job with both.

on May. 21 2013 at 9:07 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

Umm... there's a better version that I wrote called A Dark Night II. It has a better backstory in it.

on May. 21 2013 at 7:47 pm
Rebecca.xx BRONZE, Springboro, Ohio
4 articles 3 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity."
-Edgar Allan Poe
(this summarizes my life)

I like it a lot but the I love you was a bit fast. Do they have a history? Why did she say I love you immediately?

on May. 4 2013 at 2:16 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

I wrote a re-done version that is pending approval right now. It has more of a back-story on the characters and a slightly different ending.

on May. 4 2013 at 12:02 pm
E.J.Mathews GOLD, International Falls, Minnesota
19 articles 2 photos 145 comments
Wow! This story was very good! It had a lot of emotion, but I feel that it was brought out just a little too quickly. I think if you added some more thoughts on how the charactors were feeling, it would flow much better.

on May. 3 2013 at 2:04 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

Yeah. I have re-written this story however. It is called A Dark Night II, and it's also slpit into two parts. I personally believe that it is a better story, and it has an ending that is actually happy. It also explains the characters problems. It's pending approvail from the editors, however, so I don't know when it will be released.

on May. 3 2013 at 12:03 pm
RozaAlexander, Amory, Mississippi
0 articles 0 photos 67 comments

Favorite Quote:
rumors are carried by haters, spread by fools, & accepted by idiots.

wow...if only it was true, not everyone has someone to save them.

on May. 1 2013 at 8:44 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

Okay. I'll write a re-done version.

on May. 1 2013 at 8:37 pm
delilah_manhatten SILVER, Chester, Montana
8 articles 5 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
They love to tell you stay inside the lines but something's better on the other side. Johnaten Mayer

I enjoyed this piece and I think it has the potential to become GREAT. It's has such a deep concept that you need to show all the feeling behind it. Tell us what's wrong with your characters so we can relate.

on May. 1 2013 at 4:52 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

Thank you! Elizabeth is just a character to sort of introduce the cutting. I never thought about putting Nick's reasons for cutting down.

on May. 1 2013 at 3:17 pm
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 444 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” –David Letterman

I like the idea behind the story! ^_^ The only thing I'm confused about is who Elizabeth is and what problems Nick had, but I guess that doesn't matter since this is a short piece, not a full-blown novel. Excellent job!

on Apr. 30 2013 at 3:37 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.
- Christopher Paolini


Nobody's going to wait for you, so do it now.
-Ingrid Michaelson


Broken hearts heal, but never the same.
- Jessica Romo

Idiots rely on luck.
-Sherlock Holmes

Thanks! Again. :)