Somewhere between ten page papers and psychology exams I changed. I don’t know exactly when I changed or why it took me a whole semester to realize it, but there is no denying that I am not the same person I was in high school. I am no longer the misfit rocker in a sea of country and plaid. High school wasn’t exactly hard for me, I didn’t care what people thought and I had a close nit group of friends that I wouldn’t trade for the world, but my high school was really small and everything was based on who grew up in the area. I wasn’t from the area, my parents were military and I was moved there during the end of my eighth grade year, so I would never fit in like the natives did. I was originally from big cities, and I often felt like I was drowning in a sea of hillbillys, but I had the best friend a girl could ask for and parents that cared enough to let me make my own mistakes.

As great as my parents and friends were, I always wanted to be anywhere else as long as it was far away from north-west Ohio. When my senior year finally rolled around I was applying for colleges no less than three hours away. I was a smart kid and I worked hard for my 4.0 GPA so it was no surprise when I got accepted to all five of the schools I was considering. After a long debate with myself, and a two hour skype call about my future with my dad in Afghanistan, I finally decided I was going to attend Michigan State. The summer passed, a little too quickly, I went to rock concerts with Heather and continued to wear my ripped jeans and Five Finger Death Punch shirts. At the end of the summer I hugged Heather and we promised not to let our new college lives change us. Then I got into my moms suburban and we started towards the rest of my life. My stomach was anxious knots the entire ride to MSU and I was worried about finding new friends and getting along with my roommate, I never imagined that in three short months I would be an entirely different person.

When we got to campus and my mom finished helping me move into my dorm, I was dreading saying goodbye. When the time finally came I said, ”Mom, what if I don’t make new friends, what if I’m not meant for college?” She kissed my forehead and told me, in true mom fashion, that all I had to do was be myself and I would be fine. Then she climbed in her truck, started the engine, and left me alone on a campus where I didn’t know anyone. After curling up with my stuffed giraffe and contemplating spending the whole night alone in my dorm; I put on my big girl panties, swallowed my fear, and went to the lounge to make new friends. I made fast friends with a nice, quiet girl named Ebony and the next day I met my roommate, Megan.

As I grew closer with each girl I was slowly changing. Ebony was rather girly and the more we shopped together, the less rock shirts and converse I wore. My wardrobe gradually expanded and my rock shirts moved to the pajama drawer. I started wearing brighter colors and I had so many different outfits that I had to buy another dresser. While Ebony was changing my style, Megan was dragging me to parties and trying to get me to drink. I did go to a few frat houses, something I never want to do again, and I decided that drinking wasn’t so bad. I began drinking and going to parties on the weekends, something I never did much of in high school. I was still studying and all that good stuff, but I started to lose touch with Heather. A call every day became a call once every two weeks. My best friend became a stranger and sometimes I worried if she would like the new me.

While I was on campus, I stopped wanting to be the center of attention every time I went out with people and started enjoying just being part of the group. My laughter, that was always too loud in high school faded to a reasonable volume. I didn’t need to be different anymore because I was happy with who I was. I still had quirks and faults, but I realize that no one is perfect. I can only describe these changes as growing comfortable in my own skin. I had finally grown into a person that I didn’t mind being. My style and personality had changed, but I didn’t mind. The only thing I was missing was my best friend from home. When I went home for break we reconnected and to my surprise I wasn’t the only one who traded my A7X t-shirt for a cute sweater and my ripped jeans and converse for skinny jeans and boots. I found out that Heather had a similar experience and the more we talked the more I realized that I didn’t want to lose touch with her again. Just because were growing up doesn’t mean we have to grow apart.

Heather and I promised not to lose touch again and we still visit each other and skype all the time. I am much different than who I used to be. If you had asked me four months ago if I had ever been trashed at a frat party I would have thought you were crazy. I never would have thought that I would get a 4.0 my first semester in college either. It’s crazy how things change, but I’ve learned that change is a good thing and it has made me a better person.