DAYDREAMER PT1

...I was running then I tripped and somehow I was falling into a volcano. All of a sudden a song comes on and I’m about to be in sizzling lava but then my brain does this thing..

And I wake up. I look at my alarm clock which is going off and I’m late! I just grab some jeans and a tee shirt and I run into the bathroom and just comb my hair. My mom isn’t home and that means she hadn’t came home last night. I ran to my bus which was leaving. My bus driver, Kelly, is friends with my mom so she stopped.

Im the kind of person who sits by myself on the bus because I love to daydream. I look out the window and think of impossible scenarios and sometimes I cry about them. Today I was thinking of what would happen if I was in a car accident and who would care. I mean I’m not weird or anything its just its the only thing I can do to replace the friends I don’t have. My only friend is Rose and she is just like me.

When we got to the school the bell was just ringing for first period to start. As we walked into Wilson Middle school they announced our bus was late. I walked into Social Studies and people looked at me. I feel awkward so I just walked to my seat really fast. I don’t really pay attention because I like to daydream, well, I guess it just happens.

During lunch I sit with Rose and thats it. We kind of just sit there and tell each other what our dreams or something like that. Rose told me how she thought about punching J.J (A total mean girl). We kind of just laughed it off.

When I got home my mom was laying on the couch and I saw her medicine wasn’t used all day. My mom has leukemia and my dad, well, he’s in jail or something. I’ve never met him. I woke up my mom and she looked so tired. The rest of the night we watched Big Brother and Wipeout. We ordered pizza for dinner and we went to bed, thats our typical Friday night.

My mom let me have the master bedroom and she has the extra room. My room has a destination theme to it. I have postcards from the Eiffel tower and such on my pinboard. My bedsheet is hawaii themed.

When woke up I went downstairs and had my favorite cereal captain crunch. I finished the rest of the milk so i put milk on the grocery list. The whole day was pretty much my mom cleaning and I was on my phone and laptop.

On Sunday I woke up and I heard some sirens and they sounded like they were a few blocks away. So I just went downstairs to get some breakfast. I sat down and saw the police flashing lights in the corner of my eye and they stopped. While I walked to the front door I saw the police getting out of his car. He was coming to our front door. I ran upstairs to get my mom but she wasn’t in her room. Then I hear the doorbell ring and I slowly walk to the door. As I opened the door I saw the expression on the police officers face and he was depressed or sad.

I could feel my eyes start watering and I could feel the numbness going up my back like I was getting frozen. I felt my hole world start to collapse and all I wanted to do was scream. He told me he would bring me to the hospital. So I went and got my jacket and shoes.

I have never been in a police car but honestly the hole ride I was dreaming about what would my life be like. After what feels like a six hour drive (but was actually 20 minutes) we got to the hospital. A few minutes later we were heading in the lobby area and I saw my aunt and uncle. I sprinted to them, I didn’t stop and they opened their arms and I opened mine. They are the only ones who feel the same as me. I feel so warm in their arms.
While we were waiting, no one was talking then I asked what happened. My aunt said

“Well this morning, your mom called us saying that she was really nauseous. So we came over and when we did she was on the floor. We didn’t want to wake you up or tell you what happened because we didn’t want you to freak out. So we asked deputy Lundy to pick you up. She is in surgery now. She had a heart attack and they can’t get her heart to keep a steady pace. But don’t worry, she is a fighter.”

If she would have told me, she would have still had a chance because I was there. I just let my mom die! This is all of my fault! Im such a bad daughter! I should have checked up on her!
I feel a lot of tears running down my cheeks.

We have been sitting in this office for four hours now and Rick went to get us In and Out burger because we are all hungry. It may be four hours but honestly it feels like I’ve flown to mars and back, but then again that might be what I was daydreaming about. How can I daydream at a time like this I mean seriously, what is wrong with me!...


Unconditionally PT2


Every time a nurse comes out of the room I get my hopes up and I think they are coming for us but they walk right past us. My heart just kept beating so fast like I was the one who had a heart attack.

Finally, a nurse comes out and actually comes to us. She said the doctor would like to see us. I have seen movies and this is what they say when someone died and they have to break the news. The nurse led us to the hallway and the doctor was standing there. I couldn’t make out the expression on his face.

The moment he says it. I fall, I can’t get up. My mom, why did this happen to her? Its all my fault I know it! Rick and Tessa cry a little but they try to comfort me. Its not working! I run out of the hallway. I run down the stairs. I open the door and I’m now at the parking lot. Im not going back in there!

Well, I ended up going back. Rick found me and told me, probably the best news of my life. He said my mothers pulse came back and they are giving her blood now. We get to go see her! I’m scared to see her actually because what if its the last time I see her and she looks like crap?

I slowly walk into the room my mother is in. I get a glance of her then I start to slowly breath. I start holding my breath. I see my mom. I cry a little more to see her, well in pain. Even though she is sleeping. She has a mask on her face and a whole bunch of tubes in her arms.


Grey Clouds

It feels weird being home without my mom. Tessa and Rick are staying here and when mom gets home they will help her and stuff. Its sort of making my life frustrating. Well, at school people heard what is happening with my mom, and people want to be my friend. Well they are being nice to me. I like it but I don’t because I don’t like it if I’m just friends with these people just because of something happening in my life.

My mom gets to come home in one week. But until then, the only things I do is get home eat and daydream. Tessa thinks its weird seeing me laying on my bed staring at the ceiling but my uncle knows its normal for me, because hes been there a lot. I mean even before Tessa, because Rick is moms brother.

The next day I felt strange. People at school actually talked to me! My teacher brought me out to the hall and said if I ever get uncomfortable than I can just talk to her or just go to the bathroom without asking. I can’t just get special treatment just because of my mom! She is coming home I’m fine, doesn’t anyone see that?

Well, my mom is coming home soon. All I am doing is sleeping, cleaning, and daydreaming. Its wierd because the only daydreaming I’m doing is what if my mom had died. I would be living at I don’t know where. Probably sleeping in a cardboard box.

My daydreaming got interrupted by a door bell. Is my mom home!? I could feel my heart in my throat, what would I say to my mom? Can she even talk? Does she look different?



No One Knows

Its not her. She isn’t here. There is a police car. Where is my mom? When I walked to the front door I saw Rick put his hand over his mouth. Then Tessa looked back at me and ran and hugged me. All I thought in the moment was, ‘please don’t be my mom.’ I had hope. The single hope left.

My mom, um, well this is hard to say but she…. she passed away. My eyes red and I can’t stop crying. It feels like I have no one anymore. My dad, My mom, and I have no friends. My whole world is crashing ….

TO BE CONTINUED...