I remember her face, “Be strong,” she said. I cried hot tears that slipped in the cracks in my dry skin. Her face was pale and thin;her cheekbones were heavily pronounced. “Be strong” she said once more before her face dimmed, stained with a smile. I tried to bite my trimmering lip; pain is better on the outside than within, or so I've been told when I walked in on my brother cutting himself; I've never understood what that meant until just now. I started to recall my life up until this point; every day, every moment, she was there with wisdom and a warm embrace, even in the thickest of situations. I remembered when my brother ran away to find our father and was gone for days. When she found him, she didn't once scold him, but instead embraced him and cried in joy that her son was alive.

I look up at my brother, even though I can’t see his eyes, I can tell he’s fighting back tears. He pulls his scarred arm away from my little sister and storms out the room pushing a cigarette from his pocket. He’s changed a lot ever since dad ditched us five years ago. Once he found out mom had cancer, he took off running. I found my brother’s journal and he sounds just like him. All he ever writes about is leaving soon as he can. Not only does he look like him, but he acts just like him. What a prick. I hate him so much, even now at this sensitive moment he can’t even mourn or show any kind of emotion. Sadness, Anger, Fear, even happiness anything is better than nothing... especially in front of these kids.

“Is mommy okay?” my youngest brother asked

“She’s gone Davy” Rose said almost almost angry.

“Don’t do that Rose, you can break it to him when he’s a bit older,” I said through my teeth.

“Mommy, mommy Glenn lip bleeding. Mama wake up,” I heard glass shatter in the kitchen and the slamming of the front door. At least I knew he felt something other than passivity.

“Stop it Davy I’m fine; I’m smiling see?” I braved a smile just to please him. He came and wiped my tears and whispered,

“Glenn is crying” I let him sit in my lap to comfort me. Rose sat next to us as the wind blew through the cracked glass of our desperate-looking apartment.

“Be strong Glenn, Be strong” I heard Davy echo.