It is hard to open our eyes. Most of the time they are almost shut. When you finally  awaken, you regret life itself.
Ever since I understood words the world was built of tears. I was not the last one to get picked to play. People just let me stand there and watch as they had all the fun. I even stopped bringing lunch, if I did hunger would follow me all day. That was just half of the day. After school was a never ending nightmare.
My step sister loathed me for the only reason that she didn’t want to share her own dad. After my mom died my step father dropped his act. I always saw him as a generous person, but inside he was a demon. Every single day I had to work to earn money. My step father, Seth, wouldn’t provide for me. Lilith, my step sister, didn’t mind, it meant she got all the toys, food, clothes, and allowances. I made around $20 a month by selling newspapers, but my dad charged me rent. Every month I had to pay him $12 if I wanted to be underneath a roof.
Lilith’s sweet sixteen party is today. I could see the disgust in her eyes when I walked through the main doors.
“Dad!” shrieked Lilly
“Yes Dear,” Seth responded
“Why would you let that pitty excuse for a human be here?”
“For you to have more presents!”
“The only thing he can afford for a present is death!”
“Bari go home! Now!”
“Daddy, make him a cater!”
“Great idea”
I was expected not to talk to them so I always stared at them and followed their instructions. Last time I tried to disagree with Lilith, my cheekbone was broken by my step dad. My job in the family is to just stand there like a dumb rock.
Being a cater felt better than being myself. People thanked me and gave me tips. It was the happiest I felt in a while. Too many bad memories could not be substituted by one good memory. I’ve been planning something for a long time and today was the day. I ran towards Seth’s car and opened the glove compartment. One day I saw Seth place a small handgun in there. It hasn't been removed ever since.
I waited until Lilith had opened all her presents, then leaped on to the stage and smacked the microphone with my hand to catch everyone’s attention. The room filled with silence. “What does the mute kid have to say?!” yelled one of Lilith’s friends.Everyone giggled and at the same time I placed the gun next to my temple. The room filled with screams, but nobody stopped me from pulling the trigger. I felt a sharp pain in the other side of my head then came the darkness.
Next thing I know I'm in my bed. My dad was standing right beside me. I scrambled for the door but he yanked me by the arm and threw me onto my bed.
“Unfortunately the gun wasn't loaded. I just have it in my car incase I need to intimidate someone. The doctor and the police have to come over to interrogate all of us so if you write or signal in a way that would get me imprisoned, I promise you I'm the one who is holding the gun.” Seth stood up and went to eat breakfast.
Like he said a doctor and the police arrived at our house. The Doctor fortunately new sign language so it went smoothly. I told him that my Mom died two years ago and right after came my grandma. After that I couldn’t bare with living anymore so when I saw the gun I attempted suicide. It was all true which made it a great lie. After a couple hours the cops and the doctor left. They only gave me an anti depression prescription.
  A couple months have passed and the days just got worse. My mom’s third year anniversary of her death was coming up soon. The cops found her the morning after she and Seth went missing. They were both near death in their car. She had 3 bullet holes in her torso and Seth only one in the shoulder, they both passed out from bloodloss. When the doctor came out of the emergency room he only brought harmful news. Seth came out victor with a broken shoulder. My mom in the other hand died from blood loss. I cried for a whole week straight until Seth shut me up for good.
The day of the anniversary Seth paced around nervously while glaring back and forth between her ashes and me. He finally grinned and asked, “Would you like to die?”, In response I shrugged. “Do you?!Answer me!”, he howled at me with rage. I was petrified he has been furious before but this was different. I had no control over my movements which resulted in a simple nod. He quickly grinned, grabbed me by the back of my neck and dragged me to the garage.
I sat in an old wooden chair as he ordered. “ I’ve always wanted to kill you, just like I did to your Mother. The only reason I married her was for her money, but then when she ‘died’ almost all the wealth went to you. Without you in the picture all your money will go to your gaurdian. Why did you think the gun wasn’t loaded. I used them all to fake the tragedy. I watched her cry in agony calling out for you! Now since all this suicide thing It made it 100 times easier to stage your death.” I leaped towards the door, but a simple punch to the gut  kept me seated. I started panting. Then suddenly he went for rope and knotted it to the garage door’s frame. At the end of the rope was a loop just big enough for a human head.
“Get your head in here”, said Seth, I obeyed sobbing. Right as my head slid into the hole he tugged using the door frame as a pulley. He was dripping with pride as I hung the gasping for air. I looked like a fish out of water. Lilith walked in screaming and running towards her dad, but it was too late. Darkness consumed me entirely.