The Broken Record | Teen Ink

The Broken Record

April 18, 2016
By AlonFish BRONZE, New City, New York
AlonFish BRONZE, New City, New York
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Yet another day for Shane. Another day of walking around school with the negative voices swimming in his head. It was a maze with no escape. It was his sickness, that was dangerous, and unhealthy. He needed to find an answer but his mindset had become so damaged that it seemed as if it was the end for him.


"You're such a loser, no one likes you!"
    "You're so ugly, you'll never have a girlfriend!"
           "You're so bad at this sport, get away you freak!"
                                   "Kill yourself, you have no worth!"


The same things would repeat, as if a broken record had never been so broken before. He couldn't find a store to try and fix it to add a 'stop' button, but there was no shop for it but himself, Shane. His parents had no idea what was going on, since he was dieing from the inside. Nobody knew what he was feeling or hearing, not even the other students or the teachers.
 


Shane had entered shutdown mode. He started not to care whether it be his family, or academics, it all no longer mattered to him. Still, no one understood was was going on with him. If his broken record would have been played on speaker, people could finally understand him and attempt to save him.
"You're such a loser, no one likes you!"
    "You're so ugly, you'll never have a girlfriend!"
           "You're so bad at this sport, get away you freak!"
                                   "Kill yourself, you have no worth!"


The next stage of his sickness, he had become an artist, drawing on his wrists. It was his medicine for the moment. He was finally able to escape the mental pain that had been stuck in his head for years. He had found his dangerous, temporary cure.


"Shane! What happened to your wrists? Are you crazy?" said his mother Joan.
Oh, no thought Shane. His mother had clicked play, and on speaker.
"You're such a loser, no one likes you!"
    "You're so ugly, you'll never have a girlfriend!"
           "You're so bad at this sport, get away you freak!"
                                   "Kill yourself, you have no worth!"
        "Shane! What happened to your wrists? Are you crazy?"
He couldn't do it. Mental Pain. Physical Pain. Stress with the speaker button being pressed.

He had finally found the shop to fix his broken record.


The author's comments:

Having gone through the personal experience of  supporting friends who struggle, I felt inspired to share what is real about depression and suicidal thoughts, and how difficult it is to catch and stop before anything happens. I wanted to share my friends story with a made up characer that many people could relate to because they are not alone. There are so many people who struggle out there.


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JonH said...
on May. 2 2016 at 9:57 pm
You are an inspiration being able to speak openly of what goes on in someone's head. And I know your accurate on those feelings because I've been there before. Great work man. Hope to see more writings from you!