Life sucks. Everything about life just sucks. Actually, not even life, just the people that make up your life. I can guarantee you that everyone you have ever come in contact with has said a nasty thing about you. You don't have to believe me, we all have different beliefs, it's just that mine are better. Oh, by the way, my name is… actually I’m not gonna tell you, you're not important enough to know it. All you need to know is that I’m one of the c***iest people you’ll ever meet, but I tend to keep a low-profile around town. Now, I usually don't allow people to do this, but right now, I'm allowing you to enter my mind and hear all of my internal thoughts. You should be grateful that I’m allowing this because you're about to hear all thoughts about the people around me and all I know. So buckle up your seatbelts kids, you're in for a wild ride that is my brain.
Now let me start off by saying, my town has a reputation. Not even a good reputation, like we carry one of the worst reputations of all. All I can tell you is that the state I’m in is Iowa. Like I said, you're not important enough to know my actual town, but now back to me. As I was saying, we have a reputation for having many underage drinkers and druggies. My town is also filled with very rich people, including my family. Fun fact about my parents: I was a mistake and they have strived to give me everything a kid could ever want. I'm pretty sure they only do it because when I was little I heard my mom refer to me as a mistake and I cried for an hour. The only way to stop me was to promise to buy me the big teddy bear that you see come out for Valentine’s Day. Yeah, not really the ideal way to get anything you want in life, but I'm not complaining. Actually, I'm glad about it because without them buying me everything I ever wanted, I wouldn't be the c***y person you came to know me as.
Now, as I was saying, we have a lot of extremely rich people in our town. Excluding me, if you are a rich kid, you are usually a big alcoholic or druggie. They all host huge “ragers” because drinking on a school night is obviously so cool WOO-HOO, like not partying hard is literally asking to be made fun of. Nobody who is normal likes the rich people. Me, on the other hand, people usually only like me when I refuse to hold back at telling people off.  For example, one time this girl was bragging to her friends about she drank so much vodka when her parents were away. Being the smartass I am, I turned around and kindly suggested that if she didn't want to die a virgin, she probably shouldn't drink enough vodka to kill herself. This is just one of the many times that I have told someone off. If you're stupid enough to drink your life away, you probably are asking for me to go off on you. Anyways, we have a big crime rate for teens getting caught drinking and driving, having drugs in their bag, or doing drugs in the bathroom. Luckily, I never went down that road of bad behavior, but we all have our own vices.
I know I don’t seem like a girl with big dreams about where I want to go, but believe me, I do. I want to leave this hellhole and go make something of myself. Oh my god, I just heard myself say that and it sounded like a Hallmark card, my apologies. Not that what I said isn’t how I feel, I just didn't want to get all sentimental and mushy gushy, like ew no. After high school, I'd probably go to college down south. Now you may be wondering why down south unnamed teenager, well that's because that's where my own vices are. No, it’s not some weird type of drug from Guatemala, although that would make for a more interesting story. My vice is a little place called Whataburger and you can’t knock it till you try it, but let me explain. When I was younger, my family and I used to visit our close family friends in Texas every Christmas break. When I was old enough to not spit up on myself and s*** my pants, one of our family friends took me to Whataburger as like an initiation ritual to Texas culture. She ordered me this thing called a Honey Butter Chicken Biscuit and as soon as I took that first bite, I realized what true love was. Cheesy, I know, but that was the greatest thing I have ever consumed in my life. Going to school down south would mean I could have all the Whataburger I want and if that means I become fat, then I will gladly accept. It could be my breakfast, lunch, dinner, AND dessert. Obviously I don’t want to move out there only for Whataburger, but it's a major reason. God I hope that happens, then I'd be living the dream.
If anything, I’d want to go to school somewhere in Texas, I just don’t know where yet. It's so warm there, like deathly hot, but still nice. Plus I'm cold ALL the time so if I live somewhere warm maybe I won't feel like an icicle the entire time. If anything, I’d want to be a teacher. There are soooooo many possibilities that come with teaching, but I refuse to teach high school kids. I'm not dealing with the same s*** in the future that I'm dealing with now. That's just asking for trouble. High school students are uneducated nuisances that can't figure out anything without the help of an adult. Now middle school kids, they are worth teaching. They are still kinda uneducated, but middle school is the time in our lives where everything starts to change dramatically. You go through changes, first “loves” and heartbreaks that won't matter 20 years from now, and it's the last time in your life that you can actually still act like a normal kid. Once you get to high school, you're thrown into the fire without anyway of getting out. I just don't understand why they don't properly warn you in middle school how hard trying to keep up with everything would be in high school. Maybe then some of us wouldn't be scrambling to try and keep our lives together.
Oh, I completely forgot to talk about family, silly me. Well you already know I have a mom and dad who had me by accident, but I still need to talk about the child they had after me, my bratty “little” sister, Cara. Let me start off by saying she can be a real pain in the ass at times. This little freshman kid thinks she can get whatever the hell she wants with her looks. Newsflash, you like look like a potato honey. I'm not even kidding, her face is oddly shaped like a potato and it is just sooooo weird, yet somehow boys look past her starchy face, only to see a pretty face and boobs. I mean we all know that's all they look for in a girl, it's just pathetic. Let me back up a little bit, like I said she think she can get whatever she wants. She basically wears the sluttiest clothes she can find and then persuades people to let her take anything without paying for it. Yup, that's right, she is one of the typical rich kids I was talking about earlier. She parties soooooo hard on the weekends, and never gets in trouble for coming home drunk or high. Fun fact time: she was a planned child who was born two years after me. Ever since then, my parents have worshipped the ground that she walks on and never punish her for the stupid f***ing things she does, which is annoying considering she gets arrested basically every other weekend. The amount of DUI’s that girl has gotten is probably more than the amount all the other kids at school have combined. Alas, she uses her pretty features, never her starchy face, to persuade the police officers to not give her a ticket. She has only ever gotten a ticket once out of the billion times she has gotten pulled over. She even comes to school drunk. One time, she told the nurse she didn't feel good because of “bad sushi” from the night before and that's why she was throwing up, when in reality she drank a LOT of whiskey the night before. Unfortunately, my sister and I are not very close, but we have our moments where we tend to annoy each other slightly less than usual, I just don't think you should know.
I know I seem like an open book, but many people don’t realize how much pain I feel inside me. I always try to put on a happy face and act like things don’t hurt me, but I can’t brush off the pain that I feel. Many people say how I’m weird I am or that I’m a major b****, which I mean yeah you’re not lying, but there have been so many worse instances than that, all centered around an event that changed me into the girl who tried to brush off all the insults. Around the beginning of freshman year, when I was a major, rich popular kid, my social circle got invited to one of the most popular senior’s back to school party. Anyone who was cool was invited, so it was a big boost for your social status if you went. Like any high school party, people were hooking up left and right, and of course it was mostly freshmen girls hooking up with senior boys. I was dancing with my friends while drinking the night away because WOO-HOO PARTYING. As I was dancing, the hot senior boy who was hosting the party came over to my friends. He pulled me into the hallway and kissed me. I was soooo excited that a boy like him would want to kiss a girl like me. Obviously, I didn’t realize he had other plans about what would happen between us later on. He kept trying to get me to go somewhere more private, but I kept reminding him it probably wouldn’t be a good idea because my friends would get worried about where I went. He kept insisting, until he finally shoved me up against a wall, calling me a worthless little whore. I kept resisting, which made him tighten his grip on me even more. I kicked him where the sun didn’t shine and booked it for the door. My friends didn’t notice that I left until that boy stood up and proceeded to explain to everyone how I’m a huge slut who hooked up with every boy at the party, but not only that because he also said I was easy. I never wanted to have a reputation like that, I wouldn’t even wish it on my worst enemy. I tried to tell my so-called “friends” that he was the one pressuring me and trying to get me to do stuff, but it didn’t matter to them because in the world of popular people, you only believe what the person who is more popular says.
Since that year, I’ve tried to make new friends, but most people don’t want to ruin their reputations by hanging out with the “school slut”. I’ve tried to warn my sister about how she can’t let people take advantage of her, so hopefully she doesn’t have her life ruined like mine. She saw how it changed who I was and how much pain I was in. She was the only who actually believed me at all, in fact. I’m grateful that she was there for me, so I know I’m gonna be there for her if she ever needs me. Maybe it's better this way, I have no one to get in my way of my dreams, even though I wish someone was there to give some support. I easily could get my b****y popular “friends” back by buying them with money like a normal popular kid, but I’d rather live my unentitled, quiet life rather than an entitled, worthless f***ing life.