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Friday 3:29pm

I walked into the building full of glass and I couldn’t see my reflection. I sat on the seat nearest to the door so that when it was time to go in, I would be first. I pulled out my phone and looked at my empty notification bar, then locked the screen.

“All who are in the next group please enter through the door on the left.” said the lady behind the desk smiling.

I thought to myself as I walked into the room, why is she smiling all the time. Is she trying to make us feel “at home”? Well, she should stop because I don’t see my beloved TV next to that chair over there.

I always sit in a chair not centered in the circle, but more of on the outskirts so that I wouldn’t be targeted for any type of discussion.

“Hello, hello everyone” said Mr Tote as he closed the door.

“Hello Mr Tote” the room moaned.

“Okay group, please be more enthusiastic! We have a new member.” He looked at a boy with long dark brown hair, that was gelled back, wearing a Nike orange sweatshirt, light blue jeans, and orange Nike sneakers.

“Hey guys, what’s up?” He said with a smile, taking a seat next to Mr Tote.

“Let’s go around in a circle and introduce ourselves” Mr Tote started. “My name is Ramsey Tote, I am a Counseling Psychologist, and I have 19 years of experience in the field. As you can tell I am old; I am 50” he chuckled softly.

Then it was the new kid’s turn, “Hi everyone my name is Kyle Gregorian, I am a senior in high school.” He seemed so calm and at-ease with his situation, and his confidence discomforted me.

I dreaded the thought of having to introduce myself in front of everyone again; it was eating away at me. I heard everyone introduce themselves and thought of what I should say when it got to me. Should I add an imaginary middle name to make myself look cool, should I change my name entirely, or should I slouch like I don’t care, or maybe I should just leave the room while I still have the chance—

“Go ahead” said Mr Tote as our eyes locked. I had no idea it was my turn already.

“Hi uh my name is Moira Dole.”

“What else Moira?” Mr. Tote smiled at me encouragingly.

“Um well I guess you can say I don’t like coming here, but from my high school I get dropped off here every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. So I’m kinda obligated to be here.”

I looked down at my long shoe laces as everyone continued around the circle, hoping they would stop looking at my diminishing frame.

“Okay group, did anyone accomplish any of their goals this week?” Mr. Tote looked around for faces. I averted my eyes and tried to make it seem like I was thinking, like how everyone does in school when the teacher asks ‘what is the theme of this passage?’

“Yes Janel!”

“Hey, so like I went to Forever 21 because I wanted this top, but they like only had a medium, so I bought it anyways. Of course so that later I can wear it” she boastfully whined.

“What a breakthrough Janel, glad to hear that.” Mr. Tote looked for others to reply.

“Yea, great job Janel” I stated bluntly as I rolled my eyes.

I saw from the corner of my eye that Kyle laughed at my snide comment. I smirked to myself.

“Well this week I tried out for my school’s football team and I think I did well enough to get on again this year.” Kyle looked at me for approval of his comment.

Hmm, I wonder why Kyle has gracefully strolled into our synthetic therapy group? He looks healthy, smart, and quite attractive. What’s his issue?

At the end of the meetings Mr. Tote likes to talk to me about how I’m “doing” because I don’t share a lot to the group.

“Moira, how’s the grades looking?

“Good.” I quickly said hoping he would let me go.

“Define good Moira?” he smiled.

“Good as in, I’m not drowning in classwork and my lowest grade currently is an 84, which is bound to tank anytime.”

“Sounds great so far Moira, you seemed very submissive in the meeting today, are you ok?”

“Honestly, I hate coming here. I don’t see the point. Everything is so fake.”

“We are here to help all of you overcome— “ I didn’t let him finish, because I hate when people assume that I have something to “overcome”. I just walked away because my chariot pulled up to the curb.

I walked to the door and just as I was pulling the handle, Kyle showed up strangely and stood in the doorway.

“Um, can I help you?” I asked motioning him to move.

“Oh me? No. I’m just passing by, enjoying the weather, ya know.” he charismatically said running his hands through hair as if he was an Abercrombie Fitch model.

“Passing by, um, my car door?” I questioned.

“Hi, I’m Moira’s father! Are you a new friend?” My father eagerly shook Kyle’s hand. He never meets any of my “friends” , so I guess he’s trying to make the best of it.

“Yes, sir I am. I’m new here. The name’s Kyle.” he smiled at me as he pulled away from inside of my car.

“So are you done, or are you finished yet?” I looked at him crossing my arms.

“Woah woah, no need to get fiesty Mo Money.” he raised his hands and laughed.

“Mo Money? Is that supposed to be me or something?” I rolled my eyes.

“You get it? Moira...Mo Money”. He laughed at his own joke and so did my father. OMG where does his loyalty lie? I hopped in the car and told him to step on it.

“See you later Mo!” Kyle yelled as we drove off.
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At Home~ 7:35pm

“Hey, hey Moira! How’s the shrink?” my annoying little brother asked while eating a poptart.

“None of your business fatty.”

“Moira, honey be nice.” My dad locked the front door and threw his keys into a basket on the counter.

“Junior started it..you know what never mind.”

I went to my room, closed the door, plopped on my bed, then my phone sounded and I assumed that it was a friend of mine texting me. I picked up my phone to unfortunately see that it was just an alarm for me to check off my goals list for the week. Why bother? The only important goal that I put on there last Sunday was to get more sleep. Mr. Tote said that it would help me, but I swear I’m an insomniac.

GOALS 10/25/16
Sleep more bro
Get an A on the math quiz
Go to intramurals
Find a study group
Contact friends

Of these goals, I’ve only accomplished the math quiz, but I feel like it’s only because my teacher made the quiz really easy. You know when it’s super easy when everyone gets a 100.

“Moira! Time for dinner.” My father called. I sluggishly rolled off the side of my bed planting my face into the floorboards. At that moment thought I might have broke my nose.

“Coming!” I yelled back, grunting as I got off the floor.

“What are we having for dinner dad?” Junior asked while having a seat.

“Momma’s favorite.” Dad brought the plates to the table with a smile spreading across his face.

Mom died last year from American trypanosomiasis. She went to Mexico for a month and never returned.

I scarfed down my plate, quickly dropped the plate in the sink, and ran to my room. I hoped that my dad wouldn’t call me down the wash it. He didn’t.

It makes me upset when Dad references mom; I mean it is his fault that she’s gone. He forced her to go to Mexico after they had one of those weekly clashes about my father’s’ waning appreciation of my mother. After she died, my dad has tried to be more ‘interactive’ in my brother’s and my life so that we don’t fall victim to social disorders associated with the loss of loved ones. Sucks for those great intentions.

As I got out of the shower I brushed my hair in the mirror, but I strangely still couldn’t see my reflection clearly. So I swiped my forearm across the mirror; still nothing. I changed into my pajamas, hopped into my bed, and shut my eyes tightly as if I were having a nightmare, all in efforts to get that amazing treasure everyone is chatting about in school every morning; yea it’s called sleep.
— — — — — — -
Monday 7:10am

The weekend went by and I created a new goals list for the week.

GOALS 10/29/16
GET THE TREASURE
Find a study group
Hang with friends
Don’t get detention
Talk to Kyle?...

I grabbed my bookbag and ran to the bus stop, of course after my vigilant father kissed me goodbye.

“Have a good day, honey.”

“I will dad.”

After that lackluster ride on the bus I floated to my favorite class of the day. Art. Gosh, how cliche. I feel like a walking stereotype.

“Janel! How is my beloved pupil?” Mrs. Gala said to me as I walked to her desk.

“Good, Mrs. Gala. And yourself?”

“Splendid.” she put on her glasses and walked to the center of the classroom. “Class whose ready to become the next Monet?”

The class clapped and we got straight to work. When I pulled out my supplies my father texted me: Did you grab your lunch?

I sighed at the text because he’s been texting me that same text everyday, and it’s getting annoying. It’s like he’s reliving each day over and over again.
— — — — — —
Shrink 3:30pm

“Heya Mo!” Kyle strolled next me as I walked in the door. Geez he can’t even give me a minute to sit down before he talking me into an early grave.

“Hi Kyle.”

“Wanna ditch?” he rolled his neck over in my direction in a swift motion.

“Ditch what?”

“This senseless therapy group.” he chuckled as if he had told a knee slapping joke.

“I can’t do that. My father—”

“Forget him! He’s seems sketchy anyways.” Kyle threw his hands in the air.

I thought to myself that if I went on this escapade with Kyle that maybe I could find out why this jock comes to a shrink every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
“You know what, screw it.” he turned to me eagerly “Let’s get out of here.” I quickly got up from the seat and bolted out the back door with Kyle.

“Where did you want to go?” I asked.

“I was kind of hoping I can take you to my place.” he smirked and lead the way.

“What?! Your house? Oh no Kyle, who do you think I am?” I stopped in the parking lot.

“No, not my house, I guess you can call it my home away from home. Chill.” he laughed.

We took 2 ubers, a train, and we strolled down the street, up the block, and around the corner to reach the destination.

“My goodness Kyle I thought you said this place was close by.” I stated in frustration.

“If I had told you the truth you would not have agreed to come, now would you have?” he started up a ladder.

That statement made me question his intentions. What the heck, you only live once is what those millennials say right?

“Come on scaredy pants.” he mocked me from the top of the roof.

I climbed up the crooked ladder on the side of the building, and when I finally reached the top I felt like I was on top of the world. The breeze blew through my curly hair as I looked far across the city.

“You like it?”

I was too busy accessing the environment from the air quality, to the car horns, and the birds flying in the sky, to notice Kyle talking to me.

“MoiRa..Moira, MOIRA!” Kyla screamed in my direction but I was totally disconnected.

“What?” I responded embarrassed.

“Do you like the view?” He came behind me and put his arms around my abdomen, and I stretched my arms out from my sides as if we were Jack and Rose from the Titanic.

“Yes, this is the best I’ve felt in a long time. I know my brother would absolutely love this.” I took out my phone and recorded a video and saved it to show him later.

“Me too, I usually come here alone but I feel— “ he abruptly stopped.

“What?” I encouraged.

“I feel safe, like you know, not nervous around you. I have been diagnosed with social anxiety disorder. Yep! Your star quarterback is afraid of people.” he grinned.

“You know if we actually attend the sessions we could actually get better.” As soon as I said this he scoffed and quickly retaliated.

“So you’re like the rest? Get better? What if I don’t want to get better?” He got increasingly upset.

“No no no, I am just like you Kyle. I hate when others say that to me as well, but I just—”

“What?”

“Nothing.” I walked to the edge of the building and looked down.

“You thinking of jumping or something?” He walked over towards the edge as well.

“I don’t know.” I stated. What if I were to just fall? Would dad miss me? Would Kyle miss me? How about Junior?

“Well since you want to be helpful, I’m not going to let you jump because you have your whole life ahead of you. A young girl like you, pretty and smart, will make it far.”

“As will you Kyle.”

“Hmm well for me it’s different. The system is rigged man. Mexican güey like me, is libel to get deported for just breathing out here.”

I busted out into an uncontrollable cackle, because he was painly right.

“You think I’m joking Moira. It’s not fair.”

“I know man, it sucks.” I stated still laughing at his previous remark.

We probably were on that roof for an hour just talking and looking around the city when we heard someone coming up the stairs. It was a police officer. He was yelling at us while pointing his gun.

“Ok, you two put your hands up!” he yelled.

“What did we do?” I asked totally confused.

“Do what he says Moira.” Kyle raised his hands. I refused to comply because I was puzzled as to how he found us.

“Crap, my father must have called the police!” I yelled.

“Miss, please put your hands up.” he yelled coming closer with his gun pointed, and his hands shaking as if he was more frightened than we were.

“Moira, please just listen. This is not the time for your defiant persona to shine.” he looked up at me and grabbed my arm to place them up.

“Don’t touch her!” The police officer yelled then 1...2….3 BOOM!

I felt my ears rattle as I looked to my side and Kyle was laying on the pavement with his arms outstretched. His eyes rolled to the back of his head and I could see his free spirit sail down the side of the building.

“Oh my, I didn’t know what he was going to do to you! I panicked miss.” the police officer came close to my to touch my shoulders.

“DON’T TOUCH ME YOU DISGUSTING ANIMAL.” I fell to the side of my fallen friend.

“Kyle, dude get up, get up” I screamed at his corpse hoping he would come to his senses. But it was unfortunately a shot to his neck and bled quickly. I was drenched in his rich, ever so rich blood.

“Kyle no no no.” I laid my head on top of his.

“Ma’am please.” the officer came over and I quickly got up after I kissed Kyle’s forehead. I stood at the edge of the building once again. “Ma’am step away from the edge!” he called out to me.

“Shoot me too!!” I screamed in his face. “Since you think he was a threat, I must be one too?” I thought to myself, what’s the point? My mother is gone and possibly the best person I have ever met. My life is in shambles and it could not possibly get any better. My will to continue had essentially curtailed instantly.

“Ma’am please.”

“Shoot me!”

“I can’t.”

“How convenient.” I grabbed his gun and did the deed for him.

At that moment I felt as if the very ground I was on had shifting abruptly, leaving me falling to my demise off the side of the building.

— — — — — — — — ---

At A Doctor’s Office
January 15, 2018.
Present day- 12:36pm

“Yes, doc. He has been this way since she died.” Junior explains to the doctor at Ankh Hill Hospital.

“How long ago did she die?” the doctor took notes.

“Who my mother or sister?”

“Both.”

“Mother, July of 2015, sister, March 2016.


“Hmm, it’s been some time hasn’t it? And he is still referring to them as if they can respond, and are living beings?” The doctor asked as he continued to scribble on his coloring book of a notepad.


“Yes. Just as if they are both here.” Junior was so confused at this reality because his father did not do this right after his mother died, but immediately after Moira.


“Does your father routinely do this with dead loved ones? Like his parents?”


“No, he only did this after Moira killed herself because he felt responsible.



“How so?”


“He called the cops because he knew that her and Kyle skipped therapy, so he tracked Moira’s phone to find them.”


“Why were they in therapy?”


Junior took a deep breathe and let it out slowly as if was going to crack a code. “My father became increasingly depressed after my mother died, and this rubbed off onto Moira. You know how when you are around depressed people you can catch it, like a cold or something of the sort. Well, yea my sister successfully caught it. Acting out in school and cutting herself, but my father didn’t want to be the root of her problems anymore, so he forced her to attend therapy. Then she met a guy. BOOM! They’re both dead.” Junior started staring at his shoe laces in disbelief.


“Ok, so your father has been replaying this specific scene in the kitchen every morning as well? Tell me about that.”


“Yea so every morning he calls Miora down to get her lunch.” Junior motions in quotations, “Then she comes down to get it and goes to school. 20 minutes later he asks me where his phone is so that he can text Miora: Did you grab your lunch?”

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