My heart stopped. My stomach dropped worse than it would have going down a rollercoaster. Oh my God, Oh my God, OH MY GOD, WHAT HAD I DONE???? Tony was still standing there, Johnny was looking back & forth at both of us, the realization of what was going on was creeping onto his face. The crickets weren’t chirping anymore, or maybe I just couldn’t hear them over the pounding in my ears. I noticed Tony had something in his hands; flowers. He was coming over to bring me roses. I am the absolute worst excuse for a human being.
“Tony, this isn’t-“ Too late. He threw the bouquet at my feet and took off into the dark streets. I bolted after him, Johnny calling after me, but I barely heard him.
****
My sneakers cracked hundreds of twigs as they pounded through the forest ground, I couldn’t see the stars through the thick branches of the trees, and it was pitch dark. My only guide was the thudding of Tony’s feet and finally a fuzzy outline of him ahead of me. I ran forward as fast as I possibly could, grabbing Tony’s arm to stop him. Beyond us, the lights of Town Street were glowing through the leaves. At least I know where we are. I thought. I could just barely make out Tony’s face. It was solid, cold, unforgiving. Just like the night in Nantucket. I couldn’t see his eyes too well, but I knew they were ice again. His muscles tensed under my grip, and I knew he wanted to run again. He wouldn’t look at me directly.
“Tony just listen to me, I-“
“What Summer?” He pulled his arm angrily from my grip “It was a mistake? You’re sorry? It won’t happen again? I’ve heard it before! You PROMISED me Summer! You swore, we both did!” His face was angry and cold. Tears were prickling behind my eyes, he was right. I deserved his anger, but he had to listen to me, right?
“Tony, I didn’t kiss Johnny! He kissed me! Please, you have to believe me!” my voice was pleading and desperate, but I didn’t care. He didn’t either.
“You could’ve pulled away, Summer. You could’ve TOLD him you had a boyfriend!”
“I know, I’m sorry! Please, It will never happen again.”
“No, it won’t.” He whispered. “because it’s over, Summer.”
I was never more sure that my heart had stopped until that very moment. I suddenly knew the true meaning of horror.
“What? Tony, no- you, you can’t do this. Tony, please, I love you-“
“If you loved me you wouldn’t have kissed Johnny. I can’t be with you if I can’t trust you. I’m not in love with someone who doesn’t care enough about me.” Each word he spoke was like a knife piercing my heart.
“No….No, Tony…..” My head was spinning; this was a nightmare, I was sure of it.
“Goodbye Summer. Maybe one day we can be friends.” He touched one hand to my cheek, and he left. The once hot summer night had suddenly turned to a December night. All the color of my world evaporated, the only feeling was the sudden ache of my heart and the electric sensation on my cheek assuring me that this wasn’t a nightmare. Rain began to fall down my cheeks, or so I thought before realizing they were my tears. I’d lost Tony. I don’t remember how I got home that night, all I remember is the pain; The pain refused to fade. I climbed into bed, clutching my necklace, and slowly sobbed myself to sleep. I never want to see the sun again, I don’t deserve it. Outside my window, the blue bird was all alone, sadly staring out into the night; it looked as though she had a broken wing. That was how I felt now; broken. I pulled the covers over my head, and listened to the slow, offbeat rhythm of my broken heart.