August 1st, 2000

Dear journal!

 This might be fun. I was at the store today and saw you, it was like love at first sight, you were just sitting there collecting dust and I just had to get your beautiful leather self. My journal. To be honest I’m not quite sure what you write about in a personal journal type thing but I’m not one to follow the rules when it comes to things like this, so I’ll do what I please and tell you about my life at the moment! Being the perfect self that I am got herself her dream job as an interpreter for one of the biggest literary publishing firms out there. Not to praise myself too much but I’m pretty awesome. Even though I enjoy my job there are always setbacks. A lot if I may add! The hours get so long and tiring that I barely have enough time to do basic human functions like sleep. Totally worth it though. The one thing that you should know journal is that I live life in the moment, not the future or the past. To me it doesn’t matter what happened or what will happen, the only thing I can do is move on ahead.so with that being said and done I’ll take my leave and see you in a little while my sweet journal. This is Leo signing off for some much-needed rest.

August 5th, 2000

Dear journal!

It has been a few days since I wrote last, sorry but my life isn’t to glorious to be able to tell stories daily. Massive update though. I’m sick and I still have to got to work so great! Love my life. Also, something weird has been happing to be recently, I have been getting these dizzy spells that will last for minutes at a time. Something like this has never happened to me before. This really sucks, I have deadlines you know! Though I’ve been lucky enough to not get any while riding to work so A+ for safety. Not much has changed in my life overall, oh! Scratch that. Ill tell you about the book I am translating. It is called Nocte Illa or the midnight queen, basically the whole story is this girl wanting to learn magic, but her parents say no. spoiler, she learns anyway. My favorite part about translating is that you get to read book for free or in my case read while getting paid! …I suddenly feel very dizzy so that is all for now. This is Leo signing off.

August 11th ,2000

Dear journal.

It is my birthday today, ill be 25 this year. My boss told me I could take the day off but I’m not the biggest fan of my birthday and I wouldn’t have anyone to spend it with, so I’ll be going soon. The dizziness has been getting a lot worse. They can last for hours now, nothing seems to help. I’d take the train in but I’m pretty broke, so I’ll have to push through and ride my bike to work today. God my head hurts. I wonder what will happen next… anyway this is Leo signing off for the time being.

???

Dear journal!

Well I am not quite sure how long it has been since I came to this strange place or even wrote in you for that matter! My sweet journal, I’ve been far too neglectful towards you, but my actions are not in vain I promise. I have many interesting stories to tell you. Just you wait. First off, where the hell am I? the last thing I can remember is seeing blindingly bright headlights and poof! I woke up in what felt like a couple of seconds to this beautiful meadow in front of me. The grass is up to my knees with many gorgeous flowers wrapping around massive willow trees. It is hard to explain… I wish I could have taken pictures. The weird thing to me is that I haven’t ran into any people yet, I’m kind of nervous being by myself in this strange place but you got to do what you got to do I guess. Also, I have noticed something very ‘’abnormal’’ about myself, I no longer feel hungry or sleepy… I find myself not breathing at times too. Maybe this is a blessing in disguise. At least to me it’s a huge deal so of course I had to tell my only journal~. My fingers and toes are crossed that ill meet fellow travelers soon, even beauty cannot mask loneliness. Well! I’ve taken a long enough break to write all this down so this is Leo signing off for now!

December 25rd ,2000

Dear journal!

Crossing my fingers worked! After walking for what felt like eternity I found a cute little town. There are so many kinds of people and animals and I’m not sure what to call them, it? I really don’t know but I love it none the less. Everyone seems so busy putting things on their houses and in the trees. You know what this reminds me of journal… Christmas! Even though I used to live alone I still enjoyed putting up decorations, id say decorating was by far my favorite part of any holiday. I can’t really understand what anyone is saying to correct me but to put my mind ill start labeling this the twenty-fifth and onward. Being able to control something in this world makes me feel more secure so I’m okay now. I really want to look around for a while so this is Leo signing off for some window shopping!

December 30th ,2000

Dear journal!

To my disappointment there wasn’t much to look at in the town, but it was still worth it to check! While I was just aimlessly walking around I stumbled upon a bridge, a really long bridge, to the point where I couldn’t even see the other side. The pretty blue roses growing down and along the bridge caught my eye and made me walk it for fun. I have never seen naturally growing blue roses before, so I decided to make a cute crown for myself, not to brag but that shit looked so adorable. I don’t know how long I was walking for, but the bridge tapered off to a paved road embroidered with the brightest colored stones I have ever seen. Long story short I found a house! An abandoned on I think, I don’t know why it would be abandoned though. There were blue rose vines on the outer walls of the house just like on the bridge. To me it looked like a house from a fairytale book. If nobody will take it then I definitely will. Anyway, knowing me I got bored of cleaning my new house and decided to walk back to the town to watch the people live when a cart stopped right in front of me with humungous cages in the back. The man driving was staring straight at me with amazement. To my surprise I could understand him a little bit, he spoke Yiddish and due to my job, I had to learn a bit for an article. He was talking about the flowers on my head, he was weird and said that he’d give me seven lion cubs for one single rose. There were so many roses at my new house, so I said yes, one wouldn’t hurt. He pulled the cage to the ground and there were these seven lions smashed inside a small cage. Each of them had the eyes of a rainbow. It was love at first sight just like with you journal. They will be my babies for life. My ray of sunshine after a storm. This feels right… now then this is Leo signing off to bond with my loves.

February 15th ,2001

Dear journal!

It has been quite some time since I wrote anything in my sweet journal, but I’ve just needed time to explore everything first before I tell you anything. Who knows one day I might forget what these beautiful places look like so ill just write it down the best I can. Also, I named all of them myself because no one has told me otherwise so whatever. The first is bell cliff, it is a cliff right on the edge of my house. If you hit the right rock, then a bell like noise will happen. I’ve thrown rocks down a few times and it sounds like a harmony of quiet yet prominent bells, it is very relaxing. Just don’t disturb the sugar plums that live in the caves. The second is the aqua forest, it is a forest with instead o oxygen there is water. In this forest fish are like the birds you see in a normal situation. Don’t go too far or you’ll get caught by the snakes in the trees. The third is the ocean of sand, on the bridge that connects to my house there is a sea of black sand. Imagine a working jacuzzi filled with sand, there are serpents that like in the sand and if you go in there then you will not I repeat not come back out. There are also the bodyguards of the bridge, but they are nice ladies only a little creepy. Well I need to finish this house cleaning, so this is Leo signing off for a while!

August 11th ,2001

Dear journal.

My birthday is today. Ill be 26 this year, I think I will be fine this year. I am no longer alone in life, I may be a cat lady but at least that is something. This will be the first birthday in a long time where I haven’t felt so alone. To me that is crazy because all I remember from the past is pain and loneliness, but I don’t think about that anymore. I will be okay, for the first time I think I’m truly happy with my life. I feel sick just thinking about not being with my animals or my house… this is what it feels like to not want to lose something. I like it. This is Leo signing off to enjoy her birthday.

June 15th ,2019

Dear journal…

This cant be happening! Not again, why is the dizziness coming back after all of this time? Does the world hate me journal? I was finally happy, now I’m hearing voices and a constant beeping sound… kind of like a hospital monitor. The dizziness is constant, and I can hear voices talking about me like I’m sleeping. I’m awake! I’m here, I can touch things and smell and taste why are they coming now of all times. I can barely write; my vision is too blurred to see clearly. I’m a bit tired… I think ill take a nap. This is Leo signing off, hopefully not for too long.                                                                                

June 21st ,2019

Dear journal. I refuse to believe that all of this was just some dream that my mind made up while I was in a coma. I remember seeing headlights so when they told me I had been hit by a car it sort of made sense but to tell me that the almost twenty years I have spent there with the things I love has been a made-up story is just offensive. I don’t need a damn therapist because I am not crazy! It was real… I know it was. I see them every time I close my eyes, it hurts so much. I need this to stop!... this is Leo signing off for the last time, goodbye my sweet journal and thank you for listening to me when no one else would.

To my dear children,

I don’t know what is happening to me or why I came back. Does the world want me to be miserable? I has only been a few days and I know you two can take care of yourselves, but I just can’t imagine what is going through your minds. When I go to sleep I can see the seven of you, looking for me, none of you can hear or see me. I feel like I have already died. Maybe if I can sleep forever I might be able to meet my rays of sunshine again. Yes, one thing I must say is falling from forty stories is one hell of a rush. See you soon my loves.

The end for the crazy cat lady.