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One Day
There was one day when she could change everything. She had the capability and she knew without a doubt what her boundaries were. She knew the consequences and all of the possibilities that awaited her if she finally got this right.
She had one day to spin her world forward on its axis and at every point leading up to now her efforts had been futile.
This time she was a schoolteacher. She taught kids who looked up to her as if she was an all-knowing goddess. Of course, not all of them adored her so, she wasn’t perfect, but if she had learned anything in these past few years, it was that she only needed to make impact on one person to succeed in her mission.
She had been working on herself too. She cut down on the carbs and read more and adopted kinder habits. She felt changed, in fact, she felt like a completely new woman. If she had not grown into a better person, she didn’t know what else she was to do.
Somewhere in the back of her head she knew this day would come again the next year. Once again she would compel herself to believe that she was ready this time. That she had really changed now and could go on to change the world in those short few hours. But on this day, she blissfully and ignorantly thought she had all of the tools to finally reach that level when the world would be forever altered by her actions. Every other year, the universe seemed to spin backwards again after this one day, but this year, that wouldn’t happen. Or so she told herself.
She let the sun smooth over her silhouette as its morning rays slipped through the window. This was the day when her life would fall together as she had been hoping it would for so long.
She had a job, she had an apartment, and she even had a stable relationship with the chemistry teacher. That girl Matilda seemed to like her well enough and Winn idolized her so his life had to have been affected by her. Right?
Taking her breaths like her therapist advised her, she fell out of bed and stumbled towards her mirror. Her long look at herself wasn’t judgmental or self-deprecating. She simply scaled her body up and down, pinched her stomach just a little and smiled. This was going to be the day she changed everything.
Gripping her purse, she bounced off to school, stepping on every butterfly she could find. She smiled at every passerby and galloped across streets, making sure to eye the driver in each of the cars she passed.
The night before she had scoured the Internet for inspiring one-liners which she went over in her mind now. If it was the last thing she did and even if it took her until the last minute of this short, short day, she would set off some chain of events that would mean that all of her attempts had paid off.
She knew the rules well. Usually each way she changed the world was unraveled at midnight of the next day. Somehow she knew that if she just did more she could really shift everything in her life and all of the changes would remain intact even after the day ended. Especially this year when she had prepared for months for this day.
This was her moment to exercise every life-changing action she had ideated in the past year. She grinned her way up to the bright and shining schoolyard and crossed over to looming door that she was sure would lead her to change.
And she turned the knob.
---
The door squealed as the unoiled hinges struggled to move. He was finally free, at last he could breathe. Kicking his shoes away, he collapsed onto the cot and exhaled.
This was the dreaded day. Intuitively, he knew that today was the day when he could change the world. He, and only he as far as he knew, was granted one day when he could accelerate his ever-stagnant world.
He could be a superhero if he so chose, but he would never. That was too much. He didn’t know why he would be chosen, of all the men and women that walked his earth, to do something so drastic. Which he could never do.
The curtains were drawn of course and he had made sure to lock all of the windows and doors around him. If it were any other way, he would surely hyperventilate.
Turning onto his back, he pulled at the wrinkles and smoothed out the creases on his recently tailored suit. This was his tradition. Every year on this fated day, he would dress up, gel his hair and lock himself up in his bedroom until the church bells tolled midnight of the next day. The only time he would move was to retrieve the paper, which the paperboy had inevitably left too far from his door for him to simply reach for it. And he only read the paper because that was tradition too.
He liked the mundane; he even reveled in it. Every other day of the year, he let the pleasant routine of a constant workday sweep him away as the “changing the world” idea fester in the recesses of his mind.
Even though he was chosen, no one could expect him to really accomplish such a feat as changing the world in one day. No, that was all too overwhelming. When he died someone could takeover and he or she could save the world. He believed that one should leave what must be done to the ones who are capable of doing it. And he knew that he was not.
He had met a girl once, but he left her in the cold that night and didn’t spend another moment thinking of it. That was how he lived. That was what made him comfortable.
In a sudden fit, he stood up, eyes wide and feet square. This wasn’t like him at all, but a strange thought had crept up on him. What if he was the first and last to have this opportunity? What if no one else would ever be able to change the world? He wouldn’t be able to live with himself knowing that he was such a failure.
But no, he consoled himself, that could never be. And it wouldn’t matter anyway because he would live comfortably and that would be fulfilling enough for him. He didn’t need to change anything.
His legs buckled and he fell back again. His whole body shook those horrid questions away and he sighed.
No one was ever responsible for something they could not do. And there was no question that he was incapable of changing the world. He knew it just wasn’t in his nature.
The world could go on without him.
He was just a fleck of dust in the grand scheme of things anyway.
Anything he would do would just be fruitless.
---
His stare rolled down the polka dotted sheets and over the mountain that was his mound of gifts and stuffed animals. Pungent flowers lined his windowsill and smothered the incoming midafternoon sunlight, but he didn’t notice.
His mother was sprawled across the two chairs permanently stuck to his floor, papers strewn around her legs. But he wasn’t focused on anything around him. Just yesterday the doctors announced the turning point of his life. They said it like they were telling him his rabbit ran away. And he expected that too, but what he didn’t realize was that he was rapidly running out of time.
For all of his conscious years he had the power to change the world on one particular day of the year. He understood it and every year he hoped he could fulfill his mission, but this year….
He had so many plans. So many ideas for how to improve the world he had only lived in for nine years. He thought he knew how to grant happiness to his gaunt and so apparently exhausted mother. He could ideate ways for his drunkard neighbor to sober up. He even believed he could save the other patients in the hospital.
Before yesterday, he was ready to enact his plans, even to enlist help from his friends. He would make a field day of it. The opportunities were endless!
But then the diagnosis came. His doctors donned their grim masks and bit their lips, telling him he had a month to live. Telling him he should say his goodbyes and write a proper bucket list.
And the reality of everything crashed onto him as fast as anything. He didn’t have time for what he wanted. There wasn’t enough time in the world for him to change it. He could organize plan after plan, but there was no way he could act on all of them.
It wasn’t even just that he didn’t have long left on this world, but he only had one day to alter the world forever. All of his previous attempts hadn’t worked and although he thought he had enough ideas to make up for that, he realized now that it just wasn’t possible.
No matter whom he tried to help or what he tried to do, he would never have enough time to implement any of his plans and the world wouldn’t change. He didn’t have the time to finish what he started. And twenty-four hours was too little time.
He still had hope. He could be saved by some miracle and somehow live past that month, but even still, there was no way he could do anything for the world in one day.
His mother had told him just before she fell asleep that he needed to focus on himself. On feeling okay or being some semblance of happy. He wanted to be both of those things.
But it was too overwhelming. He didn’t have any time at all. All of the seconds were rushing around him and he couldn’t touch any of them.
He hoped he was the only one so overwhelmed. He held onto the wish that even though he didn’t have time, someone else would.
Maybe his mother could do all of the things he wanted to. His time was cut short, but someone else’s might not be.
A day wasn’t enough for him, but it could be for another person.
He let out a shaky breath, leaned back and closed his eyes again.
---
She opened her eyes and surveyed the room surreptitiously, searching again for any intruders. Then, curling her hands into fists, she kicked the wall. The sound reverberated through the paint, but she just kicked it again, this time turning and slamming her fist against the same spot her foot had just cracked.
Sweat dripped down her forehead as she breathed heavily. Her blood rushing and her pulse racing but only one thought really crossing her mind. For years now, she had been tasked with changing the world on one day. It had sounded dreadful to her then, but now it was like the birthday of an old friend; she always remembered, but she never let it bother her.
She had a certain mindset about her that was some sort of harmonious mix between “if it’s not broken, don’t fix it” and “this world is a cesspool.” And she believed both with a passion. So when she discovered this responsibility of changing the world, she didn’t let it touch her.
The world couldn’t be changed. She knew that. She hoped every one else knew it too. If not, she worried the world would turn into a haven for ignoramuses.
There was nothing anyone could possibly change. The earth was filled with halfwits and demons and if the entire world could be changed, she would be the first to try. But it couldn’t. She believed it to be so far past that point that if she even tried to do something about it, things would only get worse.
She sent her fist into the wall again, sending a searing pain through her arm and causing the paint chips to fall off altogether. If she couldn’t change the world, which she was sure was true, she might as well be ready for the demons to come. And they would.
There was nothing she could do about the problems that faced the world. Even if she turned herself into an optimistic wastrel, nothing would be affected. She wasn’t capable of setting off any type of chain reaction. Not because she was inadequate, but because she was only human and didn’t have the powers needed to reform her world.
At least she had the wherewithal to know what she could and couldn’t control. The world, she knew, was something out of her reach. And it wouldn’t be worth saving either.
She was shaking as she heaved, her energy waning as she continued to beat the wits out of the wall. For every thought of change, she responded with another hit. She was so tired of the people around her believing they could do anything to stop the impending doom that their world was barreling towards.
Another kick.
There was nothing anyone could do. It would be like reviving the dead, impossible and idiotic.
Another kick.
Why was she even spending her time thinking of these absurd ideas? She didn’t need to defend it. She was strong enough to admit what was wrong with the world and steadfast enough to understand that there was nothing to be done about it. It wasn’t in her control anyway.
She slapped the wall with her hand, dropping her head. At least she would be ready for all the evil in the world, she told herself. She knew she was doing the right thing.
Putting her hands on her knees, she pushed herself off the floor and walked away.
---
The child was born into the world on that very night. As the clock tolled late evening, the woman went into labor and the child was blessedly born within the hour.
She was a beautiful baby girl and her parents rejoiced with relief and joy. They did not know that she would be one of the destined few that could change the world. Of course it would be several more years before the girl realized. But for now, she and they were blissfully ignorant.
All she knew were the hospital lights and her mother’s smiling eyes. And in those moments just after her birth, the child peered into her parents’ eyes and saw what she could do for the world.
In that moment, she was more capable than any of those before her who could change the world. For her, there was an infinite realm of possibilities that she couldn’t even fathom. After all, she was just a baby. She couldn’t really fathom anything.
And as the fluorescent lights shone on the baby, in another world, a young teacher looked out her window, wondering if the world had changed. A middle-aged man in his own world curled into a ball and waited. A young boy took labored breaths and dreamed of a brighter future. And an old woman breathed heavily into her hands and let tears drip down her cheeks.
But the baby didn’t know any of those things. She simply stared around the room and swallowed her surroundings lazily.
While the young teacher sighed resignedly and the boy turned over in his bed and the man finally stood up and opened the window and the woman started running.
Still, even as the day ended, the child had all the more abilities. She could do what they could not. She could fulfill their mission. They were all wrong, but she was a bundled up galaxy of possibility.
The teacher, the man, the boy, and the woman couldn’t change the world. They would never be able to change the world whether they tried or not.
Only the baby could really change the world. And she didn’t even know it.
And as the bells chimed midnight, the world turned back on its axis and nothing changed.
I want people to understand that change is not all or nothing. There are pitfalls and there are growth spurts that weave together to help you grow. Change isn't just moving up, it's the entire process.