Death Has Its Heart in the Right Place | Teen Ink

Death Has Its Heart in the Right Place

March 14, 2009
By Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
1 article 0 photos 161 comments

Looking down the barrel of a gun is a strange feeling, but after staring into Death's dark face so many times, Jack had become accustomed to the tickles and prickles that run across your spine. It had become a familiar, a common, an ordinary feeling. He almost liked it, the sensation, of Death looming about, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. To him, it was intoxicating. It made his heart race, his blood pump and adrenaline run. It was like being in love for the first time, and the last. Yet every time that the Reaper swung his scythe on the mob boss, he always seemed to stop, never finishing the job. It was as though he, Death, took pleasure in seeing Jack sweat under his blade. They both enjoyed the mad thrill, but it seemed that this would be the last time they would saviour it.
Bang! The thunderous roar of the gun shattered the calm night. It was over.
'Here. You can keep it,' the assassin tossed the smoking gun onto Jack's cold lap.
A sinister smile cut the killer's face. Raising his chin proudly, as a young boy does after winning a prize, the mercenary turned around slowly, savouring his victory. Now all he had to do was collect his pay and live comfortably on some exotic island for the rest of his life, without worries, without problems, without necessities, without ' Bang! A second shot.
The assassin's knees broke under the pain. One moment he was savouring glory and the next he was savouring the bitter sweet taste of warm steel, the killer kiss of a bullet. On all fours, he lifted his trembling hand up to his chest: his shirt was soaked in blood that was spewing out on both sides of his trunk. He was cold, weak, in pain. Frozen sweat poured down his face as his insides burnt in anguish.
Writhing on the floor with no strength at all, he turned around to see who the shooter was. Behind him, sitting in the same leather-cushion seat he had been sitting when the assassin came in, Jack sat. The only difference was that now his right arm was outstretched with his fingers curled around the gun. His eyelids were heavy upon his red eyes, but he still maintained them wide open.
'No ' Impossible ' I shot you ' I shot you in the heart.'
Jack licked his lips and explained slowly, enjoying every word, 'I am dextrocardi-ac.'


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This article has 611 comments.


on Jul. 25 2011 at 9:20 am
Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
1 article 0 photos 161 comments
Thanks! I think the title is what I most worked on when writing this!

on Jul. 25 2011 at 9:19 am
Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
1 article 0 photos 161 comments
I really appreciate your comment, but I would also appreciate if you did not use this in a competition. I am not saying you can not do something similar, but please do not copy anything word for word. Thank you for your comment.

Greycloud said...
on Jul. 22 2011 at 5:21 am
Greycloud, London, Other
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment

yep, talk about a twist! I had to look up dextrocardia too (and as I should be studying bio it makes my guilt a bit smaller), so I enjoyed it and learned something new!

Just slight criticism, you said frozen sweat was pouring (and I am really picking at the hair on the soup here), but if something's frozen...can't pour down...I'm guessng it's not literally frozen, and it's just a way of expressing it's really cold, but I'm just saying..


on Jul. 18 2011 at 8:25 am
Tongue_Blep PLATINUM, ????, Ohio
40 articles 1 photo 769 comments
It was was AWESOME!!! great job! (Sorry for advrertizing) I just wrote two stories called nightstalker and the beast. If anyone could check them out and post some comments and feedback that would be great. Thanks! and keep writing everybody! :)(:

GaelicC said...
on Jul. 11 2011 at 9:13 am
GaelicC, Longford, Other
0 articles 0 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
No -Rosa Parks

This is an excellent story and I love how the title ties in with the end! Really enjoyed it:)

on Jul. 11 2011 at 7:16 am
Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
1 article 0 photos 161 comments
Thanks for the comment! Cheers!

beautyqueen said...
on Jul. 11 2011 at 5:07 am
it is a good story i am gonna write this in storywriting competition

on Jul. 5 2011 at 6:31 pm
poetrykid702 BRONZE, Lumberton, North Carolina
4 articles 0 photos 5 comments
The ending was so great and the way you described the scene was just wonderful! Great job!

on Jul. 4 2011 at 4:23 am
Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
1 article 0 photos 161 comments
Thank you very much! I'm glad you enjoyed it! Cheers!

on Jul. 3 2011 at 7:43 pm
ninapaniena PLATINUM, Sammamish, Washington
20 articles 7 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
To be a good surgeon you have to think like a surgeon, emotions are messy, tuck them neatly away and step into a clean sterile room, where the procedure is simple, cut suture, and close. But sometimes your faced with a cut that won't heal, a cut that rips the stitches right open

I am IN LOVE with the ending. The way you describe this scene is like I am an onlooker. WOW good job

on Jun. 27 2011 at 10:29 am
Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
1 article 0 photos 161 comments
Thanks! I'm happy you liked it! I am sure I will love your story just as much!

Aamna BRONZE said...
on Jun. 26 2011 at 7:16 pm
Aamna BRONZE, Burlington, Other
2 articles 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Happiness come to those who wait"

this was amazing. Loved your descriptive writing style. I had to look up dextrocardia, but when i found out what it meant, everything made sense. Awesome twist. Check out my story called Precarious Pursuit. Its in realistic fiction. Again, great work! Keep writing.

on Jun. 25 2011 at 8:14 am
Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
1 article 0 photos 161 comments
Thanks for the comment! Glad you enjoyed!

on Jun. 25 2011 at 8:03 am
Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
1 article 0 photos 161 comments
Thanks! I'm happy you liked it!

on Jun. 25 2011 at 6:20 am
RubyRed123 BRONZE, Carmel, Indiana
3 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life happens when you're busy making other plans"

Wow didnt expect the ending.  Loved how it was a twist

on Jun. 21 2011 at 1:23 pm
cookiemonstaaa97 BRONZE, Scotts, Michigan
4 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
Books say: she did this, because. Life says: she did this. Books are where things are explained to you, life where things aren't.
Julian Barnes

definately going in my favorites :)

on Jun. 19 2011 at 5:17 pm
Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
1 article 0 photos 161 comments
Thanks! Glad you enjoyed!

on Jun. 19 2011 at 4:15 pm
random3rainbow SILVER, Montpelier, Ohio
6 articles 0 photos 41 comments

Favorite Quote:
be the change you want to see in this world

wow!! i lov it!!! didnt expect it to end like that at all!!!

on Jun. 19 2011 at 9:45 am
Andy Binker Cosen BRONZE, Buenos Aires, Other
1 article 0 photos 161 comments
Thanks for the comment! Much appreciated! Cheers!

on Jun. 19 2011 at 9:15 am
Carabear BRONZE, Lake Mexia, Texas
2 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Death? Why this fuss about death? Use your imagination, try to visualize a world without death!...Death is the essential condition of life, not an evil."-Charlotte Perkins Gilman

I loved this, especially the pun in the title, it was very well written!!