My Problem is Not a Trendy Thing | Teen Ink

My Problem is Not a Trendy Thing

May 6, 2010
By MissAtomic GOLD, Sebastian, Florida
MissAtomic GOLD, Sebastian, Florida
10 articles 5 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I am not interested in money. I just want to be wonderful."- Marilyn Monroe

People don’t seem to get it. They think I’m “anti-social” because I’m “Goth”. Whenever they ask me if I’m a Goth, I just say yes, rather than explaining what I am. When I say yes, they call me a poser. When I say no, they tell me I’m in denial. So I’m “anti-social” because I’m a “wannabe Goth”.
That’s where they don’t get it. I’m not emo, scene, punk, or Goth. I’m just me, just Zombi Vamp. I’m not anti-social either. I don’t avoid people out of choice. It’s called Sociophobia. I’m afraid of people. I don’t think anyone gets that. Not teacher, friends, or even my family.
It’s not like I’m a shut in. I go to school, work, and I volunteer at an art museum. I can function fine around people. It’s talking to them that is the problem. It’s a crippling fear that it is incredible hard to overcome. I’ve had it since childhood yet people think I’m just weird or crying out for attention.
I’m not. I don’t want to be your friend, I don’t want you to feel sorry for me, and I don’t want you to mock me. I just want you to leave me alone. I’m not avoiding you just because I want you to talk to me, quite the opposite. I just want you to get it.

The author's comments:
Sociophobia: Fear of social gatherings, fear of socializing, fear of embarrassment in social situations that is extremely intrusive and can have markedly debilitating effects on personal and professional relationships.The signs and symptoms of sociophobia include blushing, sweating, trembling, rapid heartbeat, muscle tension, nausea or other stomach discomfort, lightheadedness, and other symptoms of anxiety.

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This article has 1 comment.

on Nov. 12 2010 at 11:40 am
Lalalovable SILVER, Antioch, California
7 articles 1 photo 50 comments
Great Article! very honest. i can realate to this. even though i've gotten over a lot of anxiety it's still there hiding.  Even talking to people feels distant at times.