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The Inner Life of the Nerd MAG
My name is Sarah, and I am a nerd. I don't know when it happened, but sometime between my boobs growing lopsided, my skin running rampant with acne, and my hair going limp one day and never recovering, I decided that the scent of new books turned me on more than guys' cologne. And I guess one day, mathematical equations and calculators just started to be appealing. So here I am, a nerd.
Being a nerd's not all bad. You don't have to worry about which party to go to on Friday night 'cause you're not going to any of them. It doesn't take long to get ready in the morning 'cause there's nobody to impress. And, your future is basically laid out – college, cubical job where you prod at computer chips, and maybe a nerd husband if you're really lucky. Oh, and one more thing – you don't have to worry about pesky high school drama 'cause you don't have anyone to experience it with.
Okay, so maybe that doesn't sound great, but it's my life and it's what I know. The truth is, it won't change. I mean, think about it: if I weren't the nerd, who would be? The cheerleader? Please. The jock? Not likely. The emos? Ha. So, this life has already been chosen for me; it's predetermined and there's no exit sign. But I have always wondered what it would be like if fate had offered an alternative.
High school for me is like being in a glass bowl, actually a foggy glass bowl. The only things I see clearly are chalkboards and teachers. Everything else is hazy. I can make out the shapes of other students as they trudge through the halls, but I can never quite make sense of them. There is the blonde sucking her boyfriend's face. Everyone knows what she did last weekend. I want that. Not the boyfriend, the attention, or the hair – I want her confidence.
Then there's the Asian girl. Although she's bright, she's not a nerd. Being intelligent makes her well known and well liked. People know her parents would disown her if she got an A minus. She's well put together, hair tight and laces bowed neatly. The teachers adore her and no matter how much I study, I'll never know as much as she does. She's pretty much a shoe-in for any Ivy League school, and her parents are depending on that full-ride scholarship. I want that too. No, not the full ride or the smarts, but her poise. Her ability to be smart but look good doing it.
The emo artsy girl inspires me. She dresses in tutus and spiked necklaces. Nobody knows her real name, but they definitely know her. She doodles anime characters and song lyrics on her notebooks. Her back pack displays key chains and tattered ribbons. She's always with that boy and two other artsy emos. I want that. Not the key chains or the emo clan, but her creativity and dedication to her passion.
Then there's my favorite: the Converse girl. Her androgynous wardrobe gives her appeal to both sexes. The guys accept her as one of their own, and the girls fuss over how her shiny hair can look so good in a baseball cap. She drinks coffee out of a silver mug and has posters of Batman in her locker. She's a child at heart and a true chameleon, the poster child of laid back. I want that. Not the Converse, but her attitude. She doesn't care what tomorrow holds, because today's a good day anyway.
The only thing is, I'm not the confident blonde, the poised Asian girl, the creative emo, or the laidback Converse girl. I'm the nerd. I wear ill-fitting jeans and stained T-shirts. I eat lunch in the cafeteria, and I study for fun. But you know what? I'm okay with that. Because being a nerd means being myself. And that's what I want – to simply be me.
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This article has 14 comments.
Nerds unite! Although, I'm not the same nerd in the article. I wear frilly miniskirts, love anime, own a spiked necklace, and I do nothing but read. I am emo, punk, otaku, nerd, lolita...I am a nerd of the highest calibur, because, in addition to books and school, I am always doing something unusual. And I love it. Because, afterall, what's the point of being normal when being weird is so much fun?
And getting exam exemptions for having a straight A average is awesome too...but my point is, there is nerd in all of us, we're just different types. Long live the nerds! <3
She was obviously trying to explain why the stereotypes, true or untrue, were not affecting how she feels about being "nerdy".
Maybe at her school, there are nerds and loose blondes. And maybe there are brilliant asians and laid back relaxers with Converse shoes.
However, steretypes or not, I really don't think she meant to be offensive or hurtful. She was only saying how she feels about herself.
Good job, I really enjoyed reading your article(:
Dear ThatBlonde,
Thank you for your criticism and I would like to apologize if my article was in anyway offensive--it was meant to be quite the opposite actually.
As you mentioned, this article represents only the attributes of the other girls that I was able to observes from the outside, which may not be the full picture of who they are. However, this article was in no way meant to ridicule, it was meant to express the positive qualities of each girl--the qualities that I most admired and wished I, myself, possessed.
Everyone has flaws, everyone will at times feel insecure, and everyone will want something they can't have. What's important is that we are able to look past the limits of societies stereotypes and realize that a label is only skin deep. What’s important is that we love who we are.
Sarah
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Favorite Quote:
Being normal is boring - Marilyn Monroe<br /> You only live once -?<br /> A professional writer is an amateur who didn't quit -Richard Bach