Lessons This Child Has Learned
1.
Do not try to save a Hershey’s square in your pocket for later.

2.
Some people like mystery and debate. Example: Going into a Barnes & Noble and going to the Harry Potter section during the great “Will Harry Live Or Die?” debate, pulling the last book off the shelf, flipping to the back of the book and declaring “He Lives!” loudly in a group of fans proved to be not the best way to make friends…

3.
When your computer freezes up and the power button won’t turn it off and neither will unplugging it, the taking out the battery sure will.

4.
Just because every single person in your county voted for McCain doesn’t mean the rest of the world did.

5.
When someone says they’re going to “burn a copy” of a CD, it does not actually involve burning.

6.
When someone is mean to you, don’t be mean back: no matter what the situation, the second guy always gets caught.

7.
“Déjà vu all over again” is redundant.

8.
You love your sister even if you don’t like her.

9.
Even at this age, bringing snacks to school will earn you friendship (however temporary).

10.
When your dad says “It’ll just take a minute!” it really means between half an hour and two hours. And when he says, “It’s so simple!” he means it’s so simple if you have the manual – which you probably don’t – and all the required tools (which are probably scattered around the house.)

11.
If your parents pay for your music lessons and drive you to them, they totally expect you to play in the recitals and auditions and everything musical thereafter.

12.
“Treat others as you want to be treated” is not one of the Ten Commandments.

13.
So what if you know every single line from Indiana Jones? That doesn’t mean anybody else does… and if they don’t, they probably won’t listen to your prattling about our beloved Indy.

14.
Listening to songs from the 60’s, 70’s and 80’s doesn’t set you apart from this generation: it brings you closer to a classic generation.

15.
Living on a ranch with no TV and the nearest friend living ten miles away can be lonely, but it can also be a blessing in the busy times of our lives.

16.
Having a dad named after Jefferson Davis (the third in our family) may not seem so special, but when you get caught speeding in Georgia on a family road trip it can come in handy after all when the policeman asks for his driver’s license.

17.
Ham Radio has nothing to do with ham.

18.
Even if you hate giving presentations for 4-H, you’ll be glad your mom made you give one when it comes time to collect the premium money.

19.
Don’t be scared of upper-classmen. They were freshmen once too!

20.
Don’t live life laughing at love, love living a laughing life.

21.
If you really need money, do not ask your parents while they’re talking at a football game.

22.
Your family will always be there for you if you need them, even if they live on the other side of the U.S.

23.
“Fun for the whole family!” really means fun for the youngish-children and boredom for the parents and confusion for the older children.

24.
It is possible to be closer to the kids you’ve known for exactly seven days than to the kids you’ve been going to school with for five years.

25.
When somebody says that you can’t write a novel in a month and a half, they mean that they can’t write a novel in a month and a half.

26.
You are never too old to watch Veggie Tales.

27.
When somebody says they love you, don’t roll your eyes. They probably mean it.

28.
Don’t wait for love. Love the world. The feelings will be reciprocated.