I’m so sick and tired of it all. I just want it to stop. I want people to stop observing the blotchy red mountains etched upon my face. I want to stop pointing out my flaws when looking at a mirror. I want to stop brushing my teeth and hair in the dark all because I can’t bear to see my pained expressions. I want to stop feeling ashamed of my physical appearance. I want to stop forcing myself to hide behind foundation and powder, and I want my mother and sister to stop demanding me to apply makeup. I want to stop envy and fury from taking over me. I want to stop feeling insecure when talking to my flawless friends and family. I want to stop fantasizing over an imaginary prince charming who’d compliment me and see past the impurities on my forehead, nose, and under my eyes. I want to stop crying over a dream left unfulfilled. I want to stop plastering a faux smile expressing artificial happiness. I want to stop turning the corner when a handsome boy passes by. I want to stop pulling over my hoodie when a group of teen models strut past me. I want to stop trying to avoid the cautious glances, wary stares, and the guarded eyes. I want to stop living in a world where beauty is a blessing for those bestowed with it, and an intolerable curse to those who lack it.

I just want to wake up feeling beautiful and free of any concerns. I want to feel confident enough to stand at the front of the class and to be introduced to new people. I want to be able to let go of my insecurities. I want to relish the youthful attention of awe and admiration rather than pity and disgust. I want to retire to bed without the burden of another day filled with unease. I want to enjoy looking at myself, noticing how my smile is my best feature. I want to finally believe in the flattery compliments I get rather than simply brushing them aside. I want to walk out the door with my head held high and my chin up. I want to be able to brush my hair with the lights on. I want to throw away all forms of makeup and simply feel content with smooth flawless skin. I just want to live my life in pure gorgeous bliss.

Is that just too much to ask for?