I raised my beer to good fortune and prosperity. Although I knew not much would come from beer. I sat down on my couch and took a sip. I felt the pleasure slip down my throat.  Suddenly a knock came at my door. It was the Italian professor that I had been seeing for the past couple months. She knelt down on one knee and asked for my hand in marriage. I was too drunk to say no. A few weeks later we went on our honeymoon. My wife asked me what I loved, I replied saying “The sea, I love the sea. Oh, and you of course.” We decided to go on a cruise on my old cruise boat the S.O.D. We were enjoying a nice day on the deck when my wife said “Look, a whale!”.  It look like a whale but I had a sinking feeling in my stomach that it wasn’t a whale. Later that day my wife decided to go for a swim. When suddenly a fin came out of the water right next to her. It jumped out of the water and then came crashing back down on my wife. I watched in horror as another red stain slowly spread out across the water. I fainted… I woke up to a ravaging sea storm. I grabbed the steering wheel and pulled just enough so I was at the right angle so the waves cut over me... or so I thought. The wave crashed over the boat sending me flying off the edge.

I woke up later next to a sandy beach. The tropical birds sang and the waves crashed gently against the ground. I was next to a giant forest, which I presumed was the rainforest. I started to wander, but I realized that I would soon get lost. I built a shelter and slept till morning. I woke up on a pole. During the night native savages had captured me and tied me up so I was prepared to be sacrificed to Ignis Dei. I was hanging next to the volcano called “Arenal” in English. I struggled to break free of my bonds. I managed to sneak a stone knife off one of the guards. I cut through my bonds slowly so it wouldn’t attract attention from the natives.  I pulled the pole off my back and started flinging natives into the volcano. “Ignis Dei will have his sacrifice today!” I thought smirking as I walked down off the volcano.

I walked back down to the village, the natives saw I had survived so they started praising me like a god. I got them to cut down a tree and hollow it into a boat. I paddled out to sea and found the wreckage of the S.O.D. I went down and found my stash of legal documents. Luckily they were still intact because they were in a airtight case, and they hadn’t been under for too long. I swam back up and threw them into the canoe. I paddled across the amazon to get to civilization. I wandered through Brazil trying to find somewhere to stay for the night. I looked up at all the giant skyscrapers towering to the sky. People stared at me walking through the city. Some tried talking to me in Spanish but I didn’t understand any of them. Finally someone spoke English and offered me a place to stay. I told them my story...