Here We Go | Teen Ink

Here We Go

March 11, 2013
By Minnesotagirl, burnsville, Minnesota
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Minnesotagirl, Burnsville, Minnesota
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Favorite Quote:
If you never ask, the answer will always be no.


Tell me something. Why is there so much pain in the world? She's gone. I don't get how she could hurt herself that badly. I can never get her back. No one saw the warning signs and if they did, they didn't say anything. Lexi was my best friend. How could I be with her every day and never notice anything changing? Lexi committed suicide last week.

"Alex, do you think you could try to go to school today? You haven't gone all week and you're falling behind. I know you're sad, but she would want you to go to school," my mother whispered to me.

"I guess I could try. I can't guarantee that I'll be able to stay the whole day though" I had stayed home from school since I had found out that Lexi had killed herself. "Mom, what should I say if people ask me about her?"

"Say anything you feel you should say. You don't have to answer them if you don't want to." She left my room. I had a feeling that if anyone says her name I might start to cry or feel really depressed. I knew I had to go back eventually, it might as well have been that day.

I left my house and went to the bus stop. As I climbed my way on to my bus all eyes were on me. I tried to ignore them but it was harder than I thought. The whole ride everyone stared at me and because I sat in the very front seat, they thought I wouldn't notice.

When we finally got to school I took a deep breathe and prepared myself for what I was about to walk into. But nothing could prepare me for what I was about to see. I opened the school door and walked in. The sight I saw was nothing like I had expected. Every poster and sign on the walls and lockers were all about Lexi and her memory. The second I walked in all eyes were on me. No one approached me, no one talked, no one moved. I took another deep breathe and continued down the hallway. All eyes were still on me. This was making me nervous and a little uneasy.

Finally I got to my locker. Lexi's locker was next to my locker on the left. Both her locker and mine were covered in flowers, hearts, and posters. Eventually, I had dug through the decorations to find the dial. I opened my locker and nearly fifty notes fell out on to the floor and all around my shoes. I started to pick them up when I saw five other people starting to help me. Each of them handed me a stack of letters and notes. I stuffed them into my backpack, and then put it in my locker. As I grabbed my binder I noticed that everyone who passed me would slow down and stare.

I closed my locker and walked as quickly as I could to my Social Studies class. The second I walked into the classroom every eye was on me. Some people gasped, others started to whisper about Lexi and me. Some of the things they were saying were, "How can she even be here?" and, "Is she even going to last the whole day?" I wanted to run, but I couldn't. I owed it to Lexi to stay there and be strong. From that moment on I knew that that day was going to be harder than I had ever imagined.

I went to my desk and sat down. The whole class people continued to stare at me. Mr.Notse came over to me near the beginning of the class and gave me the work that I had missed while I was gone. He told me I could turn the assignments in whenever I got them done. How was I supposed to do homework when I was so sad? I was sure I was going to fail every class.

Mostly every class of the day I had with Lexi and now none. The desk that she used to sit at now had a new kid sitting in it. When did she get here? Oh well, I didn't really care that much. All I wanted was Lexi back in that desk. Mr. Notse to tell us to quit talking. Then both of us staying after class to get yelled at when even though he wasn't actually mad.

Before I knew it first hour was over. I was the last one to leave the classroom. As I walked to science I realized that I couldn't remember anything from Social Studies. Who really cares? It's not like anyone gets anything out of it anyway.

I walked up the stairs, turned left, and went into the science room. Mr. Emin handed me a packet of work sheets and labs that I needed to make-up. I took my seat at my table. Once again everybody stared at me. If people continued to stare at me I was never going to get through that whole day. But I had to try.

The whole hour we talked about astronomy and time. I zoned out very early in the discussion. Next thing I knew the people at my table were saying my name and asking if I was okay. I told them I was fine but they weren't convinced. The class was almost over. I packed up my notebooks and binder. At this point all I wanted was for everyone to treat me normal. I knew this wouldn't happen. I was lucky in this class because this was one of the few classes I didn't have with Lexi.

The bell rings and I leave the classroom. I walked down the corridor to my locker. When I get there I remembered that both mine and Lexi's lockers are covered in flowers, hearts, and posters. Once again I had to tear through the decorations to get to the dial and open my locker. I put my textbook back and grabbed another book. I closed my locker and went to my third hour. Language Arts is my least favorite hour of the day. Ms. Mins hated Lexi. Now that Lexi is gone I was sure that someone else had taken her place.

I step into the classroom and I found that my prediction was true. The new girl from first hour was also in this hour. She has taken Lexi's seat and the hate from Ms. Mins. At least it wasn't passed to me. I felt kind of bad, but I also didn't. Ms. Mins handed me a stack of work I had to complete. The stack is the largest of them all. Everything I have to complete is a packet. It is all due tomorrow! That is impossible for me.

Language Arts passes at a slower pace than usual. We took a three question quiz, reviewed the answers, turned in the homework, and read. We sat there and read our books for the last twenty minutes of the hour. It was so quiet that I could hear a pin drop. I wished someone would make a noise, a sound. Anything would be better than that silence. The next time I look at the clock we had two minutes left. Everyone noticed at once and we all started to pack up. Usually at this point I would talk to Lexi, but now that she's gone I don't know what to do with the extra time.

After the two agonizing minutes are finally over, I ran out of the classroom. Tears filled my eyes. I didn't know where I was going. All I knew was that I needed to get out of here. This place has too many memories and reminders of her. I wanted to go home. I never thought that school could ever be that bad. People watched me as I ran passed them. Frankly I didn't care what they thought of me. I turned the corner and ran into the girl’s bathroom. I locked myself in a stall. The minute bell rang, I didn't budge. I wondered if I could just stay there the rest of the day. But it smelled horrible. The final bell rang. Now what? If I went to class I would be late; if I didn't go I'd be marked absent and my mom would see it, get mad, and ground me for ditching.

A plan started to develop in my head. All I had to do was get a cut or bloody nose. Then I could go to the nurse, she would fix me up and give me a pass to class. I wouldn't be marked late or absent. There was only one problem. How was I going to give myself a cut or bloody nose?

That's when I got an idea. I had two choices. One: pinch myself so hard that I bleed. Or two: hit my nose on some hard so that I would get a bloody nose. Both options involved pain and blood. I couldn't choose option one. Never would I ever pinch myself that hard. Besides my nails were so stubby that they would barely leave a dent. Now I had to go with option two. The door was the only reasonable thing I could find. I hit my nose as hard as I could on the side of it and sure enough I got a bloody nose.

I got up off the floor and speed-walked to the nurses office. By the time I got there my hand was drenched in blood. My eyes were filled with tears because of Lexi and my nose hurt. Nurse Osl handed me some tissues. I took them and put them to my nose.

"Now, how did this happen?" Nurse Osl asked me.

"I was trying to get to class when a sevie pushed me and I hit my nose on the railing." I made that story up on the spot. I had forgotten that she would ask me that.

"Say, aren't you Alex? Lexi's friend?" I nodded. "I respect you greatly. If I was you, I would have never had the strength to come back to school." I nodded again. "Okay let's check on that nose bleed of yours." I removed the tissues. “Well it looks like it stopped. Why don't you go wash your face, make sure all the blood is gone."

I got up without saying anything. I stepped into the nurse's bathroom and looked in the mirror. There was very little blood left. I cleaned off the blood and wiped away my tears that remained on my cheek.I walked out of the bathroom and sat in a chair by Nurse Osl's desk. The tears started to form in my eyes again. Nurse Osl knew who Lexi was. She knows who I am. This whole day felt like I was just meeting the people who had always known Lexi and me. Almost everyone knew that we were the unbreakable friendship. Unbreakable until now anyways.

"How did you know I'm Alex? I mean I get why you know who Lexi is." Nurse Osl took off her glasses and looked at me. "What?"

"Alex, you don't know this because you were gone. The day after Lexi committed suicide, this school was covered in pictures of you and Lexi. There wasn't a single one that didn't have you with her. It became very obvious to everyone at this school that you two had a one of a kind friendship. Even if this day feels difficult, don't give up just yet. Something good is right around the corner. With every bad comes an even stronger good."

"Thank you. I was getting ready to call my mom and have her come and get me. This day has been so difficult and frustrating. But now I think I'll stay."

Nurse Osl wrote me a pass to Mr. Notse's quiet study. “Just remember what I told you and everything will be all right."

I walked out of the nurse's office feeling much better than I had when I had gone in. For the first time since Lexi died, I smiled. Nurse Osl had given me happiness and joy. I walked down the corridor smiling. When I walked into Mr. Notse's quiet study everyone turned and stared at me. I knew that they were only staring because I was smiling. In my head I keep hearing the words with every bad comes an even stronger good. The words caused my smile to grow bigger. Everyone had confused looks on their faces. Maybe my luck had just turned around.

The bell rang before I could hand Mr. Notse my pass. I handed it to him and walked out of the room. I hadn't realized that I had been in the bathroom and nurse's office the whole quiet study. Now off to lunch. Where was I going to sit? Lexi and I had our own table where nobody else ever sat. We liked it better that way. I was going to have to find a new table to eat lunch at.

The words echoed in my head again with every bad comes an even stronger good. With that in mind I walked up to a table of girls I barely knew. I barely knew anyone except Lexi. I asked them if I could sit there and they said they didn't care. At some points the sympathy was nice and at others it was just plain annoying.

I talked, laughed, and messed around the whole lunch hour. Lexi would have loved it. My expression went blank and one of the girls asked me what was wrong. I said I was fine and that I was thinking of Lexi. That's when Stephanie opened her binder and handed me a folded piece of paper. I unfolded the paper. It said:

Dear Alex,

I know you are probably having a really hard time at school and at home. Please stay strong. I need you to be there for everyone else. By the time you read this I will be gone. No matter what anyone says about me, only rely on what you know. I love you so much. I'm sorry I brought this much pain on you and everyone else. The day that you get this I want you to go to my house, go into my room, there will be a box under my bed, open it. I know this note is short but, I don't have much time. Once you open the box, you'll understand everything. Please don't be mad at me or anyone else for what I did. I just couldn't take it anymore. Never forget me.

Love,

Lexi

I started to cry. This note was from Lexi, before she committed suicide. I looked at Stephanie. She had an apologetic look on her face. I grabbed her wrist and pulled her to the hallway. We needed to talk.

The second we got out there I said, "How did you get this?" I wiped away the tears that had run down my checks.

"Lexi gave this to me the day before she died. She told me to give it to you the day you came back to school. You two must have known each other well because she said that you wouldn't come back to school until the next week. And now here we are, the next week. I don't know how she knew you would come to me though. Lexi was special that way"

"Lexi could tell when something was going to happen. She never told me anything more about it though. I never understood any of the nonsense she talked about. Why when you first saw me at school today, why didn't you give me the note then? Why did you wait until now?

""Lexi said that if I gave this to you before lunch that you would read it and go home."

"Did you read it?"

"No"

"Why?"

"It wouldn't feel right. It was between you and Lexi. And because after I heard what happened to Lexi, I knew this note was something about it. If I read it, it wouldn't be right. You deserved to be the only one who reads it" Stephanie gave me a slight smile. A smile that showed love, concern, and friendship.

"Thank you for not reading it."

That's when the police officer came into the hallway, saw us, and started walking towards us. "Do you girls have a pass?" He asked us.

"No," we said at the same time.

"Then do you have permission to be out here?"

"No."

"Then get back in the cafeteria before I make you go to the office." We walked back into the cafeteria. "Now stay in here until you're dismissed."

We sat at a table by ourselves. For the longest time we didn't say anything. We just sat there lost in thought. They dismissed us from the cafeteria. Stephanie told me she had to go to her locker and would see me in seventh hour. I walked to my next class. The note from Lexi had felt like ten pounds in my pocket. I loved it.

The next class I sat there thinking about Lexi, Stephanie, the note, and me. Even though I was sitting in choir and we were supposed to be singing the whole hour, I never made a sound. The choir had gotten very good. They added four new songs that I was going to have to learn. The only thing that was different since the last time I had been in this class was that they stopped rehearsing five minutes earlier than usual.

That's when Mrs. Cray said to me, "Alex, the choir has prepared something to sing for you." She smiled, “If it is approved by you, Lexi's parents said that we could sing it at Lexi's funeral. I hope you like it." I nodded. The choir began to sing.

Every word and phrase was a perfect description on Lexi. When anyone would sing a solo the voice fit perfectly. The song was the most amazing thing I heard of Lexi since I had come to school. Nothing else could compare to this song. When it ended I was crying again. There was a huge smile on my face.

Through my smile and now a slight laugh I told them, "That song perfectly describes her. Thank you. I would love to hear it again at her funeral."

Mrs. Cray walked towards me, "We would like you to sing a solo in this song." She waited for me to answer. But I never said a word instead I ran out the choir room.

I took off down the hallway. Eventually I got to my locker. Lexi's locker was a constant reminder of her and a part of me just wanted to forget her. I opened my locker and took the note from my pocket and threw it on the ground. Tears rolled down my checks. I slammed my locker door. At this point nothing else mattered. Mrs. Cray was probably wondered why I had gotten upset and ran out of the choir room. I knew that if I got up in front of Lexi's friends and family and sang a solo, I would start to cry.

"Alex?" I heard a girl’s voice say behind me. I turned around and found that it was Claire. She looked at me as though I was scaring her. I knew the look on my face wasn't pleasant but I didn't care. "Never mind." She walked away quickly.

As soon as she was gone I sat on the ground in front of Lexi's locker wishing that she would walk up the stairs. She was never coming back and I knew that. How could she leave me? I thought I don't know what to do anymore. Lexi was my best friend. She's gone, dead. None of this would have happened if I had seen the signs. If there were any signs. I grabbed the note and put it back into my pocket. I got up off the floor and walked towards the front office. I was going to go home.

When I was half way there I heard a voice in my head. It said, "Don't do it. Please you are needed here more than you think." The voice was Lexi's. "Remember what I wrote in the note to you. Stay strong. Be there for everyone else. If you go home at least fifteen others will go home too. They are looking up to you." I was stopped in my tracks. This voice wasn't my mind playing tricks on me because I couldn't turn it off.

I took a deep breath and walked past the front office and went back to the choir room. When I walked in everyone stared at me. I was surprised to find out that I had only been gone for five minutes. The hour was going to end in a minute. At least I had gone back and gotten my binder.

The bell rang and I was the first one out the door. I speed walked to math. I knew there was some amount of safety there only because that is where I had my other friends. But, when I walked into the room the safety was gone. I had forgotten that I had had this class with Lexi and now she was gone. So much for a normal class.

The whole hour I was trying to catch up. There were almost ten assignments that I had to make up plus the classwork and two quizzes. It took me forever to understand anything they were talking about. My brain was fried because of all the complicated new methods. The whole time I just kept thinking, only one more class after this one. You can do it.

Eventually I did figure out what they were talking about. Everything around me started to fit together. Almost like I was a puzzle and someone was putting me together. But the last piece would not be put in until I could open the box in Lexi's room. What could possibly be in there? I couldn't think of anything that might be in there besides the reason she committed suicide. As soon as I zoned back in to what was going on, Mrs. Nness called on me to answer the next question.

"I don't know how to answer it. I wasn't here when we learned it." I was hoping that would get me out of answering it.

"Okay then let's go over it." Or not. "What do you do first?"

"I don't know."

"Can you think of anything that might help to solve this problem that would go first?"

"Nope." I wanted to laugh.

"Alex, are you even trying?" She gave me a stern look.

"Yeah, but I don't get it because I haven't been here since last week." I could tell Mrs. Nness was annoyed at me. Frankly, I didn't care much.

"Then you need to be paying more attention rather than daydreaming. “She looked around the room. "Josh can you answer number four?"

The class went on and Mrs. Nness didn't call on me again. The rest of the class I sat there feeling depressed. Mrs. Nness didn't have any sympathy for me at all. She didn't even take into account that I had been gone for almost seven days.

Finally the worksheet we had for homework was passed out and we were allowed to pack up our stuff. I threw the homework into my binder and zipped it shut. I sat there and didn't say a word to anyone until the bell rang. I stomped out of the room to my locker.

At this point the posters and other things on the lockers were just annoying. I ripped them off and threw them on the floor. People started to stare at me. I gave them a look and they kept walking. I thrust my locker opened and chucked my binder inside of it then slammed it shut. The noise it made was loud but no one cared; People usually slammed their lockers shut.

I stomped down the hallway, down the stairs, and went to the other side of the building to get to the locker rooms. I walked into the girl's locker room. All the girls in the locker room stared at me like I was an alien from Jupiter or something.

"What?!" I half yelled at them.

One girl said, “Wow attitude much?"

I walked over to my gym locker and pulled it open. At this point in time I had no clue what unit we were in or what we were supposed to be doing. I yanked off my regular clothes and put on my gym uniform. A T-shirt and shorts, how original. I put my regular clothes into my locker, shut it, and stormed into the gym. A few girls followed behind me. I was mad and didn't care who knew it. Last hour of the day. Come on Alex you can do this. Just ignore the side comments. Get through the rest of this day. I thought to myself.

The class started and we had to do stretches, then strength, then we'd get to what we were really doing that day. It turned out that we were in our volleyball unit. We grabbed our folders and wrote down the rules. That took half of the hour. Then we got to play. The nets were already set up. The teams were decided and put on their courts. Stephanie was on my team. This was good considering what had happened earlier. The game started. On my first hit I smacked it out of bounds. My whole team got mad except for Stephanie.

Come on! I thought you can do this. Just get through the rest of this day. Don't listen to what anyone has to say. I took a deep breath and continued to play. My team didn't let me hit the ball the rest of the game. Eventually Mrs. Reggers told us that we could go change.

I half ran half sprinted for the locker room. I went straight to my gym locker and ripped it opened. I grabbed my regular clothes and put them on the floor. I took off my gym clothes, stuck them into my gym locker then put on my regular clothes. By then most of the other girls were in the locker room already. Half of them were giving me nasty looks.

"Okay what? Like seriously why do you all keep staring at me and giving me nasty looks?" I was determined to find out the answer. "If you all are willing to stare at me constantly, and then tell me why."

That's when Jenny said, “Alex, we aren't mad at you. We weren't giving you nasty looks either. Every one of us is well, in shock, confused, and honestly amazed."

"Okay." That was all that I said before I walked out of the locker room. The bell was going to ring in like a minute anyways and we were allowed to wait in the hallway. I waited outside the gym doors until the bell rang. I saw Stephanie coming towards me but I went into the gym. She was right behind me. I wanted to run and hide. Never come back to school. Never leave my house again.

Stephanie caught up to me right as I was leaving the gym through the other side. "Can we talk?" She asked me with a gentle voice.

"Only if it's fast." All I really wanted to do was go to Lexi's house and open that box.

"Okay, first are you okay? I mean all those other girls were just being dumb and whatever but, you didn't seem okay when you left."

"I need to get to Lexi's house like as fast as possible." We walked down the hallway. I was speed walking and Stephanie could hardly keep up with me.

"I can give you a ride if you want. It's faster than walking."

"Thanks." I said gentler than before. "Where should I meet you?"

"The front of the school." I nodded and went up the stairs. I walked over to my locker. The posters, flowers, and hearts were gone and a part of me wanted them back. My locker opened with ease. I grabbed my backpack and put my homework into it. The notes from earlier took up so much room that I had to jam everything in. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't fit everything in my backpack. I held my textbook in my arms.

My locker slammed shut when I closed it. I walked down the stairs and headed towards the front of the school. People stared at me but I was used to it by then. My guess is that they were surprised to see that I had lasted the whole day. I walked through the front doors to the outside of the school. Stephanie was waiting for me. We exchanged hellos and walked to her mom's car.

We got in and the car started to move. Stephanie and her mom talked for a while then it turned quiet. We turned onto Lexi's street. I became nervous and excited. I didn't know what to expect in the box. We pulled into Lexi's driveway. I said thank you as I got out of the car and closed the door.

I took a deep breath as I walked up the driveway to the sidewalk and onto the patio. I knocked on the door. Paysliynn opened the door and looked confused. "What are you doing here?" She asked me as she let me in.

"There's something that Lexi told me to do today. Can I go up to her room?"

"Sure. But don't mess anything up. My mom wants it to stay the way it was when Lexi was last in there. I'm not allowed to go in but I'm sure my mom won't mind you in there as long as you're fast."

"Okay thanks, Paysliynn." She smiled at me and I went up the stairs.

I never thought that I would go into Lexi's room after she died. I pushed the door opened and saw what I had always seen whenever I had been in Lexi's room before. Clothes on the floor, papers on the desk, nothing had changed. I walked over to her bed and looked under it. Nothing. Where's the box? I thought. I didn't want to ask Paysliynn because I didn't know if she knew about it.

I went around to the other side of the bed and looked under it. Nothing. I took the note out of my pocket and read it a few times. It said under the bed. That's when I remembered that there was a part of her floor that opened. The only problem was that I would have to lift the bed. Paysliynn told me to not mess anything up.

"Alex?" I turned around to find Paysliynn staring at me. "What are you looking for?"

"Paysliynn I don't know if I can tell you."

"If it's about the box that Lexi kept under her bed. I know all about it. I'm the one who helped her hide it." She walked over to the bed and grabbed one of the ends. "Well are you going to help me lift it?" I nodded and grabbed the other side. We lifted the bed. "Okay can you hold it while I grab the box?"

"I think so." She let go of the bed and crawled under it. The bed got very heavy. Paysliynn climbed out from under it and I set the bed down.

"Here" She handed me the box and walked out of the room.

The box was just a regular shoe box. There was nothing special about it. I could tell that it had been Lexi's because of the drawings that were on the sides. This is it. The mystery is about to be over. I thought to myself. Taking another deep breathe I grabbed the lid. I lifted it and peered inside. The contents was a, most the complete opposite of what I had thought. I was thinking that there would be a necklace, a letter, or maybe even her suicide planning.

In the box was a picture of me and Lexi, a key, and a pill bottle. Lexi didn't have to take pills and this wasn't the way she killed herself. The doctors said that she jumped from her window. Because her room is on the third floor we had to believe them. What was the key for? Great the puzzle gets even bigger. The picture of me and Lexi was from when we were eight. We had just become best friends. I had forgotten that this picture was taken.

I took the box with its contents and walked down stairs to Paysliynn's room was. "Hey is there a room that needs a key to open it? One that Lexi would have the key for?" She looked at me for a few seconds then nodded. Paysliynn got off of her bed and walked up the stairs. I followed her until we got to the end of the hallway.

"My mom said Lexi could have this room to do whatever in. As soon as it was Lexi's, she went out and bought a doorknob with a lock. It's been this way ever since. I've never been allowed inside. A part of me wants to go in, but another part says stay out."

"I don't know if you should go in. If it's okay in there then I'll let you in. Okay?"

"No," She replied immediately, "I'm not going in there. There was a reason Lexi kept it locked. Out of respect for my sister I'm staying out. Just don't do anything stupid."

I laughed, "I promise I won't." I put the key in the lock and turned it. Paysliynn walked away. The look on her face was depressing. I knew she was sad that her sister's suicide cause was a mystery. Hopefully I could solve it soon. I hated not knowing what caused her to do something so drastic.

Pushing the door open I stumbled into the room. There was a desk in the far right corner. Newspapers were scattered all over it. On the floor there were books, old assignments, empty water bottles, and pills. Questions rolled through my head. I couldn't answer a single one of them. My biggest question was why Lexi would want me to look in the box and come in here. There wasn't anything in there that would help me find out why she killed herself.

Kicking through the stuff on the floor, I walked over to the desk. That's when I saw it. Or should I say them. The top three newspapers were from after Lexi committed suicide. This wasn't possible unless someone else had a key to this room.

I ran as fast as I could down the stairs to Paysliynn's room, but she wasn't in there. "Paysliynn?" I called throughout the house. No reply. "Paysliynn?" I called again. No reply. What was going on? Nothing made any sense. The floors creaked under me as I walked. I searched each room as I went through the house. Level by level, room by room. Nobody was home. Paysliynn had disappeared.

Someone else had to have come into the house. Lexi and Paysliynn's parents weren't home yet. This was starting to make me think that someone had kidnapped Paysliynn. But it also made me think that Lexi didn't commit suicide after all. She was murdered. By who? I didn't have any idea.

Lexi and Paysliynn's parents walked into the house right as I walked into living room. "Alex?" Mrs. Llik stared at me. "What are you doing here? Where's Paysliynn?" She got a worried look on her face. I had never seen a parent more worried about their child.

"I came here because Lexi wrote me a note telling me to come here and look in a certain spot for something." My voice was frantic as I explained. "Paysliynn was in her room-"

"What do you mean was?" Mr. Llik interrupted me.

"I don't know." tears were starting to form in my eyes. "I was on the third floor and I asked her where something was. She showed me then walked away. I went looking for her a few minutes ago because I was wondering something. I couldn't find her and I got really worried. Now here we are." The tears over flowed my eyes and started to run down my cheeks.

"Alex, calm down." Mrs. Llik's words weren't very calming. "Was anyone else in the house?" I shook my head. "Are you sure?" I nodded. Mrs. Llik turned to Mr. Llik. "Get the phone." He walked away immediately. Mrs. Llik turned back to me. "I just don't get how this could keep happening to us?"

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to cause any trouble." Mr. Llik returned with a phone in his hand.

"Alex, you didn't do anything." She took the phone and dialed 9-1-1. "Hello, I would like to report a kidnapped child." She listened. "Okay" She nodded a couple of times "Thank you," and hung up. "They're sending a police man over here right now."

"Should I go?" I asked hesitantly.

"No, we need to stay because you were here when it happened. Are you sure you didn't see or hear anything?"

"I'm positive. I was on the third floor in Lexi's locked room." Their faces went from normal to looking very puzzled. "What?"

"How did you get in there? We don't even have a key for that room and we have been searching Lexi's room frantically for it."

"The key was in a shoebox under her bed in the floor. Paysliynn showed me which room the key went to then she left. That was the last time I heard and saw her."

"What was in the room?" Mrs. Llik was close to tears.

"Newspapers from after Lexi died were on the desk. Trash was on the floor. I was going to ask Paysliynn about the newspapers, but I couldn't find her." Mrs. Llik was crying now. "Was there anyone who could possibly have a key to that room?" They both shook their heads. "How did those newspapers get in there then?" The question wasn't mean for them. It was meant for me.

"Paysliynn didn't have a key to that room. Only Lexi did." Mr. Llik choked out.

"They were keeping secrets from everyone." I looked down. There was a knock at the door. Mrs. Llik opened the door, two policemen walked in. "Should I leave?" I took a step forward.

"No" one of the policemen said immediately. "We might need to question you."

"Okay" I took a step back. The policemen looked around the room. Neither of them said anything. We stood there staring at them.

Finally one of them spoke, "When did you notice the child was missing?" He looked at Mr. and Mrs. Llik. They both looked at me.

"About an hour ago." I said at the ground.

"What is the child's name?" The second officer asked.

"Paysliynn Michelle Llik." Mr. Llik responded without thinking.

Both policemen nodded."I'm sorry, my name is Officer Roger. This is Officer Macks." He sighed.

"My name is Bill and this is my wife Lorene." Mr. Llik looked at me. "This is Alex; she was Lexi and Paysliynn's friend."

Officer Macks asked, "Who is Lexi?"

"Lexi was Paysliynn's sister. Lexi committed suicide last week." I answered still staring at the ground. Officer Macks nodded.

Each of us were taken into a separate room and talked to individually. It was almost like an interview. Mine lasted the longest, by just about twenty minutes. The officers left after that.

I asked if I could go back up to Lexi's locked room. Mr. Llik said I could go up but not for long. The stairs creaked as I walked up to the third floor. I had left the door of Lexi's locked room opened. The room looked different than when I had been in there last.

The newspapers that had been scattered all over the top of the desk were now in a neat stack. The water bottles from the floor were in a trash bag along with the old assignments. The pills on the floor were crushed like someone had been walking on them. Now I knew someone had been in the room. But, how did they get in here without anyone seeing them?

I looked to my right to find the window wide open. Duh, that's obviously how they got in. Why would they clean the room but leave the pills on the floor? Nothing was making any sense. I walked over to the window and shut it. Who ever got in wasn't getting in again. I wondered over to the desk. The newspaper on the top of the stack was from today. Impossible.

The person that came through the window had cleaned the room except the pills. But they left a newspaper from today on the desk. They know Lexi is dead yet they keep bringing the papers. I didn't understand anything. Lexi is dead and Paysliynn was kidnapped. Could she possibly be dead too? No, I couldn't think like that. Not yet anyway. I was going to get her back.

Noises came from behind me and I whipped around to see who was there. Mr. and Mrs. Llik walked into the room. Both looked all around as if they were inspecting it. I stood there, frozen. They both turned and walked away, not saying a thing. Suddenly my feet were moving and I was at the stairs. Each stair passed by in a millisecond. I was running through the house to the front door. When I got there I ripped the door opened and ran home.

It was cold and raining. My breath was escaping me. I couldn't catch it. Eventually I had to sit, stop running. The rain beat down on my skin. The street was empty. Only me making noise. Tears began to run down my cheeks. There was no holding back. Everything came out. I was now determined to find the truth behind Lexi's death and to find Paysliynn's kidnapper. I owed it to them.

The rain beat down even harder than before. My head tilted from side to side. I was done crying. Too much hurt had been put into this. No more tears, no more pain. Paysliynn would be found and the truth behind Lexi's death would be revealed. If it cost me my life, then so be it. I stood up from the curb. I took off running in the same direction as before. More power was built up inside of me. Then I came to an immediate stop.

That's when I felt it. Or should I say them. The eyes. Piercing me with stares. Someone was following me. If they were going to hurt me they would have done it when I was sitting on the curb. When he stepped into the light it hit me like a brick had just been thrown at me. I know him. I couldn't figure out how or when I had met him.

"Don't be afraid." His voice was deep and familiar. "I just want to talk."

"That's what they all say." My words came out before I could stop them.

"But I am not like the rest of them. I truly only want to talk to you, Alex." His eyes searched mine. Looking for answers.

"I don't know Lexi and Paysliynn's secrets." Again my voice came before I could stop it. "They never told me much. I don't know anything."

"Oh but you do." He started circling me. We never left eye contact. "You know more than you think."

"How do you know?" I took my eyes away from his.

"Paysliynn told me." I gasped as the truth was held out in front of me. "I was not the one who took her. I was merely the one who got the secrets out of her." A smile crept up on his lips.

"You know where she is?" My eyes became captured by his.

"Tell you what."

"What?"

He stopped directly in front of me."I'll trade her for you. You take her place. Paysliynn goes home and you come with me." He chuckled under his breath.

It took me a while to think of how to answer. If I took Paysliynn's place, she would be better. But I didn't know what would happen to me. If I didn't take her place, she might be tortured. I would feel guilty for the rest of my life. "Okay." My life for hers. It's a fair trade.

A smile crept onto his lips. "Good." He grabbed my upper arm and pulled me into the darkness that stood behind him.

He dragged me a few hundred feet or so. I was startled when he stopped abruptly at a rusty old door on an old brick warehouse.I didn't recognize where we were anymore. He knocked three times on the door. It opened.

He grabbed my arm even tighter and yanked me forward. The hallway was dark and cold. Moss had started to grow on the bricks that lined the walls. My breathing began to get faster. I dared to glance at him. His eyes were glued on the door at the end of the hallway.

"Where are we going?" I dared to ask.

"Shut up, girl." His grip got stronger on my arm. It was becoming unbearably painful.That's when I figured it out. I finally knew where I knew this mystery man from. He was a student teacher at Paysliynn's school. Paysliynn still was at the elementary school, even though she was in sixth grade. I couldn't remember his name, though. Why would he want to kidnap Paysilynn and kill Lexi? It didn't make any sense.

He pulled me until we reached the door at the end of the hallway. It reeked of flowery perfume and minty candles. The door creaked open. A woman's laugh filled the building. The high-pitched squeal of a young girl came from the same direction of the laugh. The man shoved me inside the room. It was lit by candles. He knocked me onto my knees on the concrete ground. I heard a scream, again from a young girl.

"Oh, Bobby don't hurt the girl." A woman's voice demanded. "That's my job." She got up off of the chair she was sitting on and walked over to me. I recognized her too. A student teacher from my school. Her hand came down and landed on my head. She grasped my hair and pulled me back up to my feet. A yelp escaped me. "Shut up." She released my hair and I fell to my knees.

"Don't hurt her!" Paysliynn screamed from behind the woman's chair.

"Paysliynn!" I screeched. The man knocked me back onto the floor.

"No! Please stop. Don't hurt Alex. She didn't do anything. You know that. It was all me and Lexi. Alex never knew. We never told her anything." Paysliynn called out as she began to cry.

"Told you we should have gotten this one here earlier." The woman yelled at the man. "Bring the young one to me. I have some ideas." The way she lingered on ideas made me worry what happened in this mad place. The man went over to grab Paysliynn.

"Should I untie her?" The man asked.

"Well of course, you useless piece of," She paused as if to think. "Just untie her."

Names jolted into my mind like a gun being fired. The man is Mr. Roberts. The woman is Ms. Ayler. But most people called her by her first name, Kenna. She looked so much older in the dark. Mr. Roberts on the other hand, looked much younger.

I started to get up, but was kicked down immediately by another woman behind me. Another scream came from Paysliynn. "Stop screaming, Paysliynn." I whispered. "Hurt me, not her." I heard Paysliynn say. I didn't think she actually meant it, though. Laughs came from Mr. Roberts, Kenna, and the other woman. They sounded like evil ones that only villains in the movies have.

"That can be arranged." I could hear the smile creep on Kenna's lips.

"No!" I scream as I lunge forward attempting to knock Kenna down. Mr. Roberts stopped me before I could get one foot. His arms wrapped around me like chains. I was propped up on my knees, wanting to fall over. Mr. Roberts grip got stronger and I could hardly breathe anymore. "Just please," My breathing got shorter and shallower. "Let her go." I started to have a coughing fit.

Kenna's lips still held a smile. It was as if Mr. Roberts had brought me here, only to kill me in front of Paysliynn. Paysliynn's face held horror. She was only eleven, she shouldn't have to deal with her sister's death then witness mine.

My vision was beginning to get blurred. I knew I couldn't black-out, not now. If I blacked-out, Paysliynn would be doomed, and so would I. My blinking slowed until I didn't open my eyes anymore.

I heard someone scream my name. My breathing slowed down even more. "Alex! Wake up, please!" I heard Paysliynn scream over and over until I couldn't hear her anymore.

My dreams are nothing like they used to be. They are filled with haunting, death, and blood. I knew where I was. I was in the building where Mr. Roberts, Kenna, and the other woman were keeping Paysliynn and me hostage. At least, that's where I thought I was. I thought for sure that death would take me. It would steal me from Paysliynn. Take my life from her. Not only my life, but her hope along with it.

A scream made me flinch. It was followed by several other screams. Paysliynn's screams. What were they doing to her? Another blood curdling scream. I couldn't take it anymore. The torture had to stop.

My eyes flew open. That's when I could finally see where I was. I was in a room with no windows, a steal door that was locked, and I was on the concrete floor. My back was stiff. I cracked it several times before it finally felt better. It took a while before my eyes could fully adjust to the darkness. There wasn't much to see.

There no sounds, except for my breathing. Had the torture stopped? Had Paysliynn died? Was she being kept somewhere? Was she okay? How bad was she hurt? I tried to stand up, but ended up falling right back to the ground. I had absolutely no strength what so ever. I had to find Paysliynn, though.

I heard a loud crash followed by a scream. I had to help her. I had to get to her. But first I had to get up, and stay up. I slowly got up, first onto my knees, then onto feet. My head hurt, and I was dizzy, but I was up. Now I just had to get out of that room.

There were no windows, so that wasn't an option. The walls were made of concrete bricks, so that didn't help. The only way out was through the door, like that was going to happen. Not only was it impossible for me to break my way, no one would ever open the door.

My head started to pound, and I found myself back on the floor. I was in a sitting position, but moved to lay down on my back. After a while of being in that position, I hatched a plan. I knew the room wasn't sound proof. I also knew that the only way out was the door. Maybe if I started to scream, they would come to open the door, and I could escape. It's was risky move, but what choice did I have?

My plan was simple; scream until I heard someone coming. Then lay on the ground, and act like I'm dead. When someone opens the door I jump up and attack them. Okay, the more I thought about it, the more I knew it wouldn't work, but it was worth a shot.

I sat up slowly, and then got to my feet. I took four slow steps to the door. With my lips almost touching the door, I began to scream as loud and as blood-curdling as I could. When I stopped after about thirty seconds of this, I waited to hear foot-steps, but they never came. I screamed again and again. But still, no foot-steps. Weren't they worried something was happening to me? Why weren't they thinking that I was about to die. Then it hit me. They don't care if I die. They killed Lexi and they're torturing Paysliynn. They don't care about me dying. All they care about is the secret.

If only I knew the secret. I pressed my back against the wall and slid down to the floor. My knees tucked up to my chin, and my head in between them. I heard a noise at the door, which was now to my right. There was a knock on the door. I stayed in the same position as the door opened slowly. Tears now rolled down my face.

"You know," a young girl's voice said, "Last time I saw you cry was when you were told Lexi died." I peered up at Paysliynn's face. It was full of hurt.

"Where are we?" I asked her as I wiped away my tears.

"The basement of the building. They put me down here all the time. I heard you screaming a while ago. I thought it was them playing a trick on me in order to hurt me again. But I guess curiosity got the best of me. Good thing too, it made me find you."

"The door was locked. How did you get in?"

"It's only locked from the inside." She gave me a smile.

"Oh." I should have thought of that. I mean, come on I could figure out everything else, but I couldn't think of how Paysilynn opened a door. "Where did they go?"

"Not sure. They usually go out at night." Probably to get more victims. "But it's mid afternoon. I have no idea why they went out now."

"Paysliynn, how long has it been since I saw you last? You said it was mid afternoon but, it was mid afternoon when Mr. Roberts brought me here." I spoke with caution not knowing if we were being listened to or not.

"I haven't seen you since they knocked you out yesterday. I thought they killed you." Paysliynn gasped, I jumped from the surprise of it.

"What are you doing here?" A woman's voice said. "Get back to your room before I whip you again." Her voice was harsh and demanding but, not one I've ever heard before.

"Bye." I heard Paysliynn whisper as she left. She stopped and turned to the woman. "Mela, Alex doesn't know. So give up now." I heard a slapping noise and slight yelp. Then footsteps as Paysliynn walked away. A door slammed shut down the hallway.

The woman, whose name I assumed to be Mela, walked into the room. I could finally see her face. A huge pink scar ran from her left eyebrow to the bottom right of her chin. "Listen up girl, don't get me mad. Pay-Pay is lucky I'm not allowed to kill her. If I was, she'd be dead."

Mela's eyes were like rays. They shot beams of fear through me. Only one question was on my mind. Was Mela allowed to hurt me? I doubt it. I mean, if she was wouldn't she have done it by now? Wait a second; did Mela call Paysliynn 'Pay-Pay'?Mela turned to leave but stopped in her tracks, "Just in case you're wondering, I have permission to hurt you. I can't kill you, not yet anyway." She chuckled. Then spun on her heal and left.

"Great." I whispered. I walked over to the wall across from the door and sat down. So Mela was allowed to hurt me, but she couldn't kill me. At least not yet. My eyelids became heavy. Even after being knocked out for a day, I was still exhausted. I lay on the cold ground and waited for sleep to take me under.

When I woke up, I was in a different room. This one had an air-mattress, which was pumped up. The ground had carpet that was shaggy and needed to be replaced. A baby blue blanket was folded up in the back corner of the room, with a pillow on top of it. Well, at least it was more comfortable.

I walked over to the air-mattress and sat down on it. Immediately I sunk down to the ground. I should have expected that. I turned and lay down, grabbing the pillow and putting it under my head. The pillow was stuffed with feathers so it did little for support. I became so bored that I decided to look for the door. The walls were covered in purple and blue striped wallpaper. How I was going to get through it, I didn't know. How did I even get in the room if the wallpaper covered any possible exits? I slumped back down on the air-mattress and fell asleep soon enough.

Light blasted down on me. I opened my eyes, but was too blinded to see anything. What happened to me? Was I dead? I couldn't be sure.

"Turn it off." I heard a man's voice command, followed by a slight grunt. "I said turn it off you idiot! We're not trying to blind her!" A moan escaped my lips. "Turn it off! Now!"

"Fine," The light shut off and I could still barely see. "Have it your way." As everything came into focus, I saw a woman standing over me. A man was standing next to her. At first I didn't recognize them, but then realized that it was Mela and Roberts.

"W-what's going on?" My voice was weak and dry.

Mela glared at me. "You should know by now." Her words dragged on. "After all you have been here for over a week." As I analyzed what she said, I finally realized what she meant. Somehow, I had been here for a week. By now I had to be added to the list of missing children. My parents were probably freaking out.

"Mela, shut it," Roberts demanded. He smiled at me as if I was his dessert. "Well, Miss Alex you look quite worried. There's no need for that, we won't hurt you."

"You already have." I screamed. "You murdered Lexi. I have no clue what happened to Paysliynn. Who knows what going to happen to me?"

Mela stepped towards where I was strapped down, "Don't worry about that darling." Her voice forced Goosebumps on my arms. She pressed her cold hand against my cheek. I tried to bite it. She slammed her hand over my mouth and slammed my head against the metal table I was laying on. A yelp escaped from me. A laugh came from Mela.

"What do you want with me?" I demanded.

Another laugh came from Mela. Roberts stayed quiet and looked down to stare at the floor. When Mela had finally stopped laughing, she glared at Roberts. "What, why don't you laugh with me? It's not like this girl is worth anything.“ Her finger was darted straight at me. "That girl is the only thing keeping us going. Without her, we are nothing!"

Roberts snapped his head up, grabbed Mela by the throat, and thrust her against the wall behind her. "Would you shut up? Do you want this little brat to know everything! Anything that we say around her, everything, she could remember! Who knows what she'll do! Shut it you incompetent fool!" He released Mela's throat. She dropped to the ground immediately. "Get up." Roberts had turned into the one that worried me the most now. Mela looked so weak and defenseless.

Tears started to run down my face. But, because I was laying down, the tears ran into my ears. My ears became plugged from all of them. I could have sworn that Mela started to scream at Roberts for what he just did. Just as I stopped being able to see, I felt a doctors mask slip over my mouth and I was blacking out, again.

No feeling, no smell, no sight, no sounds, nothing. Laying down, standing, sitting, I couldn't tell what I was doing. Of course after being moved around so much, I once again had no clue where I was. Especially because I couldn't see anything.Tap, tap, and tap. Where was that tapping coming from? Tap, tap, tap. Guessing from the tapping, I think it was high heels on a hard floor. A door opened with a loud creaking sound. It shut again with a bang. A girl’s laugh filled the room. Paysliynn?

"Wow, I'm surprised." Paysliynn's voice said. "Alex, I expected more from you."

"Paysliynn?" I croaked, "What's going on?" Another laugh.

"Here, let me help you." She took off a hat that had been over my entire head down to my shoulders. The light blinded me. "Wow you really took a beating."

"I did?" As I tried to sit up, my vision became blurry. "Ow, my head." Hammers pounded on my head. I flopped back down on to the metal slab. "Paysliynn, where are we?"

"Not far from your school. Just about two or three blocks I think." Her face was covered in hurt and concern. "Alex, I'm really sorry."

"For what? It's not like you did anything wrong. Everyone is entitled to keep their secrets." Paysliynn gaze dropped to the ground. "What?"

A tear rolled down her cheek. "Alex, I- I never meant for this to happen. I'm so sorry! We tried to keep you out of this. We really did. But soon it became too much to handle. We had to drag you into it if we wanted to keep the secret, a secret. It was meant to be kept not spread around to everyone. Everything would change if they knew. You're taking a beating in order to harm me. Torturing you, hurts me more than actually hurting me. They thought killing Lexi would get me to spill everything, but I'm not that weak. Just promise me one thing, Alex."

Tears were streaming down her face now. "Of course, Paysliynn. You can always count on me for anything."

"Okay," Paysliynn sighed deeply and looked at me as though she was preparing to tell me what was really going on and what the secret was. "Alex, promise me that you won't ever think different of me; of Lexi too, even though she's gone. Remember who we really are, not as you see me here. Don't think down about us."

"Paysliynn I could never think differently of you. No matter what happens here or anywhere for that matter. You and Lexi are amazing for keeping your secret, a secret. I have got no clue how you do it. But, you are-" Just then the door behind Paysliynn whisked open to reveal Roberts. He reached out to grab Paysliynn around the mouth. "Pays-" I screamed but, it was too late. They were gone. She was taken from me, again.

I leaped from the metal slab and slammed on the white concert door screaming for Paysliynn to come back. Where and why had Roberts taken her? A high pitched little girl's scream filled the room. Paysliynn had been taken to be tortured. Whatever the secret was, they wanted it badly enough to kill for it. Life was a game to them, and they were in it to win it. No matter the cost. The game of life was simple. Stay alive to win, die and you lose.

Another scream filled the room. Louder and higher this time. It sounded like it was right outside of the door. "Help!" I heard Paysliynn plead. "Alex!" There was nothing I could do except pound on the door screaming for them to stop hurting her.

Wet, my bare feet stomped into the redness. The floor around the door was coated in a layer of blood. I knew it was fresh because it hadn't been there until a few seconds ago. "No!" I screeched as I slammed my body into the door over and over again. "Paysliynn, I'm coming for you!" I shouted at the door hoping she would hear me. Unless she was already dead.

The clicking of the door unlocking alarmed me. The only thing that shocked me more was who was behind it when it swung open. "How's it going', Alex. You look terrible. I thought I was the one who was supposed to be dead." Lexi pronounced. "You look stunned. I know you're surprised that I'm alive after all." She giggled like a little kid. Lexi's face went straight to serious in the blink of an eye. "Don't be fooled, Alex. More has happened here than you think. Poor little Alex hardly knows a thing. Isn't that right, Paysliynn?" Paysliynn stepped out from behind Lexi.

My jaw literally dropped in astonishment. Lexi was alive and Paysliynn was fine. What was going on? Nothing made sense! "You see," Paysliynn began, "Lexi was never hurt, I was never in danger, and you, well you always were."

"W-what's going on?" They began to circle me. I felt as though they were walls caving in on me. "How could this really be happening? You," I pointed at Lexi, "Are supposed to be dead! You," I pointed at Paysliynn, "Are supposed to be almost beaten to death. But instead you both are standing here like you're perfectly fine!" I shouted at them.

They both abruptly stopped circling. Paysliynn on my left, Lexi on my right. "Oh Alex," Lexi giggled, "You have no idea what has happened to anyone. Even if you did, it would be too complicated for you to understand."

"Secrets are meant to be kept." Paysliynn whispered in my ear. "Especially this one." Their laughs filled the room with sound. "The friends you once knew are gone. We're not the same little girls anymore."

"Embrace it, fear it, Alex" Lexi hissed.

They each grabbed one of my shoulders and thrust me to the ground, holding me there, not letting me move. Each grip got tighter until my shoulders went numb. "What happened to you guys?" I screamed. "This is not like either of you to act like this!"

Just then Lexi grabbed a doctor’s mask to put over my mouth. Her eyes switched from looking at me to the mask, as if to tell me something. Looking inside the mask I could see thick black writing. We are trying to help you Alex! How could that be possible? The mask came down over my mouth and nose. I waited to black-out again. It never came. I sat there in awe. What's the point of this then?

Roberts burst through the door. "Why isn't she unconscious?" He demanded.

"I-I don't know sir." Lexi said with a shuddering voice.

"The clora-form isn't having any effects on her." Paysliynn whimpered.

"That's not my fault now is it?" Roberts spat at her. "Now fix it!" He turned on his heel and left the room. I hoped he would not return.

Now was my chance to ask questions. "Okay what is-" Lexi slapped her hand over my mouth before I had time to say any more. Paysliynn gave me the look that said Alex stop talking. We are not safe. Just shut up before you get us hurt. Or at least that's what I got out of it. Lexi was shaking her head as if to tell me to not talk. So now was not question time. It was shut up Alex time.

Lexi started to shake her head. Meaning this was not the time for talking. Why, though? Tears dribbled down Paysliynn's cheeks. We sat there in silence starring at each other. The crying continued. The silence continued. Footsteps came and went. No one stopped at the room. It seemed like forever until the silence was broken.

"I hate myself for this."

"Lexi would you just shut up! None of this is your fault. It's not mine either. Or Alex's. None of us could control this. Especially Alex! She doesn't even know the secret. Yet look at her." Paysliynn cried.

Lexi started to scream. "Would you just shut your mouth! You don't know anything, Paysliynn! I swear if we weren't here-" She stopped herself.

"If we weren't here then what, Lexi?" I dared to ask.

"I don't know."

Footsteps stopped at the door. We sat there for what seemed like an eternity, cringed against the back wall waiting for what might come through the door. The sound of the lock being unlocked. A huff to go along with a push that meant the door beginning to open.

"Alright you little brats," Kenna began, "you are all going to die."

"Well yeah everyone dies eventually." Paysliynn retorted.

"And you just might be the first of the three." Gasps escaped Paysliynn and Lexi. "Death is not far for any of you. Roberts is getting annoyed with having to keep you all alive. As soon as we get the secret, you're all dead."

"I told to you not to say anything to them, Kenna." She spun around to find Mela standing behind her. Mela grabbed Kenna by the hair and dragged her into the hallway. Another hand came from around the corner and took Kenna from Mela.

Mela smiled, "Don't worry girls. You won't be here for very long." She turned and strode out of the room locking the door behind her. I could have sworn I heard her say, "Brats." But I was too scared to be sure of anything anymore.

"I really don't care what that stupid secret is. All I know is it ruined my life!" I declared after a minute of silence.

"Alex! I'm sorry. I never meant for you or even Paysliynn to get mixed up in any of this." Lexi began, "Alex, Payliynn only knows about the secret because they threatened to take her away. That's when I told her everything, the night I was taken. The note that Stephanie gave you was from me, but it was only a cover story so that no one would find out about the secret and what was going on. Stephanie doesn't know anything about this. I had no idea that I was going to be taken that night."

"Alexis?" Paysliynn whispered as tears rolled from her eyes to her cheeks.

"Come here," Paysliynn crawled from the other side of the room to sit next to her sister. Lexi put her arm around Paysliynn's shoulder and pulled her into a hug as she continued to talk to me. "Anyway, I was in the room that was locked. Paysliynn told me that you know about that. I was trying to get rid of some stuff when Meten came in."

"Who's Meten?"

She turned to Paysliynn, "She hasn't seen Meten yet?" Paysliynn shook her head. "Oh. Well he's a buff guy. He scared me so I screamed. Meten put his hand over my mouth and started to pull me out the window. When I started kicking and trying to get away, he took a bottle of pills and shoved one into my mouth. It knocked me out. The next thing I knew, I was here. Lots of different rooms, lots of being knocked out and relocated again, and again."

"Until I showed up a few weeks later."

"Yeah, Paysliynn tell Alex what happened to you."

"Okay, I came into the locked room after Meten knocked Lexi out. I had knocked the bottle out of his hand and the pills went all over the room. I was trying to get Lexi back, but Meten pushed me down. I didn't realize Lexi had been thrown out the window. He forced me to take one of those knock-out pills too. The last thing I remember seeing is Meten climbing out the window. I woke up five hours later. Lexi was gone and there was no trace of her or anything that had happened."

"Why didn't you tell your parents that Lexi had been kidnapped? I mean, why say she committed suicide?"

It was Lexi who spoke. "Because if we had told them about what was going on, they would have wanted to know everything that we were doing at all times. They would have been in danger then too."

"Paysliynn," I turned to look her in the eyes. "When I had come to your house to get the box, what happened? I was in the locked room and when I went to find you, you were gone. I couldn't find you anywhere."

"Oh, that." Her voice cracked. She put her head on Lexi's shoulder. "I was in my room. Roberts came in through my door actually. I was about to scream to you for help, but I couldn't risk letting him know you were there. He grabbed my arms and threw me on the floor. Roberts told me that if I didn't cooperate, Kenna was going to kill me. I obviously didn't want to die, so I did what he said. I had to be as quiet as I could and I wasn't allowed to leave a note or anything. He said that if there was any trace of where I went, Mela would kill me. He handcuffed me and dragged me down the stairs to the backdoor. I was put into the trunk of a van and blind-folded."

"Paysliynn, I am so sorry. If I had known I would have done something to help you."

She chuckled, "I know, but I couldn't let you help me. I didn't want to you have to be with me and Lexi. Which I guess now is kind of pointless." Her smile seemed to lighten the mood.

"Okay there's something I have to ask." They both nodded, meaning for me to continue. "Why did you two push me on the ground trying to knock me out again? Why wasn't it safe for us to talk then, but it is now?" They gave each other a look, but no one spoke. "Well?" I asked hoping for someone to answer me this time.

"Force." The word came out of Lexi so fast I wasn't sure if I had heard her right."Force?" I asked and she nodded in response. "Why can we talk open now, but couldn't like ten minutes ago?"

"They stand there." Paysliynn answered.

"Where? Who?"

"Roberts was standing outside the door. He always does, but the others don't. We wanted him to be away before any of us said anything."

They are always thinking of ways to be protective. Not just of themselves or each other, but me too. "But wait, when you both came in, why were you saying all of that stuff?"

"That was what they had told us to say." Paysliynn shuddered remembered what had happened not long ago.

I started to say something but Lexi started talking. "Mela literally gave us a script and told us exactly what to do. Kenna told us that if we didn't," She bit her lip trying to stop tears that were already streaming down her cheeks.

"Lexi, you don't have to say anymore." Thank you, she mouthed, burying her face in Paysliynn's shoulder. The conversation was done after that. I had a few more questions, but I decided that they had had to answer to many questions already. Silence fell over us, Paysliynn and Lexi fell asleep leaning against each other. I fell asleep not long after.

When I awoke, they were gone. The metal table that had once been there, was now gone. There was no trace of anything that had happened inside the room the day before. I sighed, wishing that they were with me. I stood up and walked around the edge of the room, my hand running along the edge of the wall; skipping over the door.

Circling the room once more, I stopped at the door. My hand wrapped my hand around the handle and pulled. It clicked and popped open. I peered my head out the door and look left and right, but no one was coming. I stepped into the hallway, not knowing where I was going.

Before I knew it I was running. Checking every door to see if it would open. No luck. Every door was locked or didn't go anywhere. The hallway was going to end. There was one more door until dead end.

"Why didn't you tell your parents that Lexi had been kidnapped? I mean, why say she committed suicide?"

It was Lexi who spoke. "Because if we had told them about what was going on, they would have wanted to know everything that we were doing at all times. They would have been in danger then too."

"Paysliynn," I turned to look her in the eyes. "When I had come to your house to get the box, what happened? I was in the locked room and when I went to find you, you were gone. I couldn't find you anywhere."

"Oh, that." Her voice cracked. She put her head on Lexi's shoulder. "I was in my room. Roberts came in through my door actually. I was about to scream to you for help, but I couldn't risk letting him know you were there. He grabbed my arms and threw me on the floor. Roberts told me that if I didn't cooperate, Kenna was going to kill me. I obviously didn't want to die, so I did what he said. I had to be as quiet as I could and I wasn't allowed to leave a note or anything. He said that if there was any trace of where I went, Mela would kill me. He handcuffed me and dragged me down the stairs to the backdoor. I was put into the trunk of a van and blind-folded."

"Paysliynn, I am so sorry. If I had known I would have done something to help you."

She chuckled, "I know, but I couldn't let you help me. I didn't want to you have to be with me and Lexi. Which I guess now is kind of pointless." Her smile seemed to lighten the mood.

"Okay there's something I have to ask." They both nodded, meaning for me to continue. "Why did you two push me on the ground trying to knock me out again? Why wasn't it safe for us to talk then, but it is now?" They gave each other a look, but no one spoke. "Well?" I asked hoping for someone to answer me this time.

"Force." The word came out of Lexi so fast I wasn't sure if I had heard her right."Force?" I asked and she nodded in response. "Why can we talk open now, but couldn't like ten minutes ago?"

"They stand there." Paysliynn answered.

"Where? Who?"

"Roberts was standing outside the door. He always does, but the others don't. We wanted him to be away before any of us said anything."

They are always thinking of ways to be protective. Not just of themselves or each other, but me too. "But wait, when you both came in, why were you saying all of that stuff?"

"That was what they had told us to say." Paysliynn shuddered remembered what had happened not long ago.

I started to say something but Lexi started talking. "Mela literally gave us a script and told us exactly what to do. Kenna told us that if we didn't," She bit her lip trying to stop tears that were already streaming down her cheeks.

"Lexi, you don't have to say anymore." Thank you, she mouthed, burying her face in Paysliynn's shoulder. The conversation was done after that. I had a few more questions, but I decided that they had had to answer to many questions already. Silence fell over us, Paysliynn and Lexi fell asleep leaning against each other. I fell asleep not long after.

When I awoke, they were gone. The metal table that had once been there, was now gone. There was no trace of anything that had happened inside the room the day before. I sighed, wishing that they were with me. I stood up and walked around the edge of the room, my hand running along the edge of the wall; skipping over the door.

Circling the room once more, I stopped at the door. My hand wrapped my hand around the handle and pulled. It clicked and popped open. I peered my head out the door and look left and right, but no one was coming. I stepped into the hallway, not knowing where I was going.

Before I knew it I was running. Checking every door to see if it would open. No luck. Every door was locked or didn't go anywhere. The hallway was going to end. There was one more door until dead end.



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