Shallow | Teen Ink

Shallow

March 30, 2014
By GhostMatrix SILVER, Bradenton, Florida
More by this author
GhostMatrix SILVER, Bradenton, Florida
6 articles 3 photos 82 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live Each Day To The Fullest. -Quote From Somewhere Else-

I'm Whatever You Want Me To Be - My Quote -


Author's note: Movies and Books helped expand my imagination. I'm not finished writing this book yet. But I hope you like it so far.

Alvin and Jennifer Mitchell wanted a child, they tried but with zero results. They adopted a little boy named Ricky. Ricky had light brown hair that curls on the edges, and light green eyes. 20 years later, Ricky grew up to be a selfish, mean, and stuck up person. He was head of a corporation, with some strings attached. One late after noon Jennifer Mitchell had some surprising news…she’s pregnant. Mr. Mitchell and their son Ricky were stunned.
Late one night Mr. Mitchell wanted to have to serious talk with there son Ricky, about how poorly he’s treating his employees, and that he will not be put in the Family Will until he cleans up his act. Ricky was outranged by what his father said. Late one night Ricky sneaked down to his fathers studies, looking for the family Will. Ricky took down the giant family picture hanging on the wall, which behind it was a safe. He knew the combination like the back of his hand. It opened, there was a rolled up piece of document paper, he read it quickly and thoroughly until he came across family names, and just like his father said his name wasn’t in it. He shoved the document back in the safe and closed it, making sure not to make a sound.
The next morning when Mrs. Mitchell when to check on the baby; she screamed in horror. Mr. Mitchell and Ricky came running in and saw Mrs. Mitchell crying. Mr. Mitchell asked what’s wrong. She pointed towards the crib, Mr. Mitchell stood there his eyes wide…the baby was gone. Mr. Mitchell went and called the police, while Ricky was comforting his mother. The police came over and searched the baby’s room, no evidence could be found. The parents put up poster and fliers hoping that someone would find their baby.

Mail was shoved into the mail slot, when the door bell rung, a man came and picked up his mail, when he saw a letter with a red seal on it. The man picked it up and read it- Good work keep the baby hidden and you will be very wealthy, the police are looking, going from house asking have you seen this baby. Don’t slip up, or I’ll make your life a living hell, count on that. The man though, I have alot of money riding on this, I can’t afford to get caught. The man went back into the living room and knelt down next to the baby in the crib, hey you lil pipsqueak; he said in a sutle tone, your going somewhere for a long time, and I’m expecting you to stay gone.
A week later, the man packed up all the baby stuff and drove. After a couple of hours driving; he came to the place, it was getting dark now. He came to a crummy run-down old house with garbage bags around the yard. He ranged the door bell, then quickly rushed to his car and skidded away, leaving in a glimmer of street light.

The House was cold, thin smoke lingered through the air, but not so much that it can choke you. One room was messy, filled with clothes and left over junk food. The bed had stains but it was stable, a boy sleeping under the covers got a sharp pain and yelled out, a hand had smacked him sayin “GET UP”! “TIME FOR SCHOOL”! “WAKE YOUR SISTER UP WHILE YOUR AT IT”. The boy scrawled though a hole in the house to his sisters room. He went to his sisters bed and said sis wake up time for school. No answer. Sis come on I know your not sleep, and he pulled off the covers; she wasn’t there. Just then he heard a noise coming from the roof. The boy went to see if Malcolm and Fran was awake…Nope they went back to bed. He climbed the ladder his sister had in her room, to no surprise she was sittin on a blanket on the roof, just lookin up at the dark blue sky. She was all ready dressed. Morning Zoe the boy said. Good Morning Zayne the girl said. Zoe got up and said Zayne come on lets go, I don’t wanna be late today. Zayne said why not? You usally don’t care if were late or not. Yea, but I don’t feel like getting beat today just wanna chill, you know when we get out. Zayne got on the roof, don’t worry Zoe I promise we’ll be outta here, soon we don’t gotta deal with these two jerks no more.
























“Zoe got up and said yea I know, I know, you told me and threw the blanket at him, come on were gonna be late if we don’t hurry”.

They made their way across the street to the bus stop, and waited for the cross-walk to say GO, so they could cross. “Man I’m hungry said Zayne”. Well maybe if u had gotten up early enough you could have gotten breakfast said Zoe. In that house, sometimes I’d rather starve said Zayne. The bus rounded the corner; Zane said holy s***, theres the bus. Lots of Trucks, and cars were in the way, and they weren’t stopping, not for us…, they had work, they just think were stupid kids going to school, we are; but were not stupid Zoe though. Finally the cross-walk said Go, and the cars and trucks skidded to a stop. We ran to catch up with the bus…but too late it was all ready gone. Zoe said tryin not to look defeated, you know the bus drivers a b**** anyway she wouldn’t have stopped for us. Zayne took Zoe by the arm and said we won’t be late, just trust me. We made our way down to the New Jersey subway station, and caught a ride.” The man driving it said HOLD UP U TWO! We stopped dead in out tracks and looked at him”. Wanna ride, you need to pay.

I just stood there lookin stupid cause I know I didn’t have any money, just the money I have for lunch. Before I could say anything Zayne had his sock in his hand and he pulled out a ten. The driver said with a nasty smile, since theirs two of you its doubled.





Zayne gave the man a long and irritated stare, before pullin out a 20 and handed it to him. The man smiled and said where you wanna go to? We need you to take us to Marbury high Zoe said.

The driver said thats kinda a long way, plus the closest I can get you guys is to the park on Marbury Street. Zayne said ok cool, thanks. When we sat down, I looked at him and said where did u get that money? He gave me a shrug and said I found it. I looked at him and said u took it from Malcolm and Frans savings didn’t you. He turned to me with a smug look, yea so? You know there goin to kill us right? Maybe…maybe not, look there gonna kill us more if were not in school plus I’m sure Malcolm cant even count, I’v been taken some money for a while now. Have they noticed Zoe said? They don’t have a clue, I take money every once in a while so they don’t get specious, cause I know their not that Dumb said Zayne. Zoe looked around at the unfamiliar faces and how close they were looming over her, makin her feel uncomfortable. Zoe was snapped out of her baseless fears, by a loud obnoxious voice, Hello! This is your driver speaking, we’ll be talkin a short detour for a moment. The subway train quickly slowed to a stop when the driver announced we are now at Marbury street station! Zoe and I grabbed our nap-sacks and got off the train. Zoe and I ran up the subway stairs and we finally arrived at the park, we could see the school only a couple blocks away. Zayne looked at his watch, Oh no, we only have ten minutes to get in, theres no way we can get there on foot before they lock the gates. I looked down at the ground completely defeated, when Zoe pulled at my sleeve. I turned to look and her: she said Zayne I think I know what might help us.
























Zayne and I was racing down the street on these skateboards we found…ok took, they were just layin up against a house, We’ll return them, but right now it’s a matter of life and death. “Zayne Ollied over a car, and I skidded across a railing towards the school; Zayne right behind me. The gates were beging to close, Zayne said we need to pick up the paste a lil sis. We made it in, but Zayne nap-sake got caught in the gate; he slammed against the metal hard, f*** he said. Zoe turned and said Zayne what the hell. Its my nap-sack its stuck. Zayne and I pulled and pulled until it broke, there was a gaping hole now, but at least he wasn’t stuck no more”. We raced inside the building; Zayne was havin a hard time since some of his stuff was fallin out, but we made it to class with no time to spare. We made it in time while the bell was ringing the teacher wasn’t there yet, Thank God.

Zayne and I sat down in our seat completely exhausted. When a women in high heels a while lab coat, and straight black hair walked in. Hello class. My name is Mrs. Hobbs I’ll be your substitute teacher for today.


A couple of guys in our class was smiling like idiots, Even Zayne said wow she’s pretty hot for a sub. I ughed at the thought, but when I really look at her, I say ok. Shes beautiful, heck gorgeous even. I look my ear buds out that I got from the school store, and plugged them into my ears; my hair was short but long enough so no one could notice the buds in my ears. Time went and gone, until lunch time came around. Zayne said about time I’m starving.





Zoe said idk if I’m hungry anymore; Zayne looked at me and said come on if you don’t eat here you’ll have to wait a whole day to eat something decent. I’m just gonna pass on lunch today, before he could say another word, I was all ready gone, making my way out to the court-yard, to the pivillan, a few kids were there not to my surprise. I sat down leaning against a tree under the nice cool shade, and got out my ear buds, listening to heavy metal music all ways makes me feel better, and I slowly closed my eyes and slept. It wasn’t long till someone came and woke me up, it was Zayne and he was carrying two lunch trays in his hands. Zayne whats up? “I thought I told u I wasn’t hungry”. Well u may want to eat this. He handed me a tray of food, and a small smile rose to my face. MEATBALL-SUBS. We both ate in silence, until I handed Zayne my tray and said thanks. The bell rang exiting people from the café. I got up and Zayne dumped the two trays in the trash, as we walked to our last class of the day, GYM. Zayne seemed excited, I on the other hand didn’t wanna do s***.





















We arrived at the gym, and the coach was already yellin at us to get ready, Zayne and I went our separate ways when we rounded the corner to the locker rooms. After a few minutes, I sprinted out into the gym while Mr. Veal was takin attendance, when he saw me he said your on thin-ice miss Zoenette, thin-ice, be quicker next time. When he turned away I rolled my eyes and began stretching. Four laps around the track, jumping jacks, sit-ups, push-ups…is he tryin to to make us suffer said Zayne; he has no mercy. He told a guy to keep running even though he was caughting like crazy and collapsed. Mr. Veal finally said go to the nurse, but the kid had a hard time gettin up. Mr. Veal said for crist sake you two over here. Zayne and I walked over. Take him to the nurse Mr. Veal said and jogged off. Zoe shock him and said you alright kid, he opened his eyes slowly and said idk maybe, Zayne and I grabbed both his arms and halted him up and walked him off the track
and into the building into the nurses office. Zoe knocked on the door, we looked through the tiny window the lights were off. I’m thinkin what kind of school is this? I told Zayne to hold him while I get something out her pocket…a paper clip. Old fashion, but still works. The door unlocked and we walked in and flicked on the lights, Zayne went and layed the kid down on one of the beds. After a few minutes we asked, what’s your name kid? The kid slowly opened his eyes and said Marcus Knight. Okay Marcus your breathing is pretty bad, what medz do you take? I…need…I…need…my…inhaler Marcus said. Zoe went to the cabin and looked for an inhaler that read Mr. Knight and grabbed it. Marcus sat up slowly; Zayne helped him up.

Marcus took a deep breath and started to relax. After a while Marcus said thanks.
We both said No problem. Mr. Veal was riding my ass today, Marcus said. Yea he’s a bit of a control freak, we all laughed. Just then we head foot steps and the door swung open. Mrs. Taunt stepped in and asked how ya’ll get in here, she has a country accent but she was real nice. She started directly at me and smiled, oh I see. Tricky tricky Zoenette, but you should be careful. Zayne asked Mrs. Taunt isn’t this your day off. She said yes but I needed to collect a file from here.





















“Mrs. Taunt snapped her attention to Marcus, what’s wrong with this boy she asked”. He needed his in inhaler Zoe said. Mrs. Taunt sighed Elizabeth is always messing around even on duty. We heard footsteps coming towards us, then talking, then the door slowly flung open, in walked Elizabeth. She was shocked and said how you two get in here? Then her attention turned to Mrs. Taunt and she straighter up. I thought this was your day off Elizabeth said. It is, I just came to get my folder Mrs. Taunt said, and it’s a good thing I did, this young man needed his inhaler and you were no where to be found, what if he died just because you weren’t doing your job? Elizabeth said nothing just stared. Alright you two go back to class now Mrs. Taunt said. Zoe and I walked pass Elizabeth and I could tell she wasn’t to thrilled about what happened. We hurried back to the gym and straight into the locker rooms. The bell rang; I grab my bag and met Zayne at the school gates.

Did you get any detentions today Zoe asked?
No, Zayne said, I was careful.
Zoe said your never careful.
I can when I wanna be, and Zayne smiled.

We take a short-cut across the park. As we pass, we see this girl sitting on a bench in front of a building, what caught Zayne’s eye was that she was all alone and she seemed real young to be off on her own. Zayne pointed, I look up and saw her. The girl was black with brown hair with blonde edges at the end. We walked up to her; she was on full alert, but when she looked up at us she relaxed and just stared. Zoe said hey to the girl. The girl just waved. Zayne asked what are you doing out here by yourself? The girl’s gaze dropped and said cause…I ran away from home, It was horrible there. Zayne and I looked at each other with understanding. Zoe sat down next to the girl and said we know how you feel. The girl looked up and said you do? More than you know said Zayne, and we thought about running away as well. The girl asked why haven’t you?

Zayne gave her a look and said were waiting for the right time. Just then we heard music coming from a guy with shades on; his hair pulled back; he wore blue jeans, a black shirt, and black mittens that were cut off at the tips. He was playin the sax. Zayne asked the girl are you hungry? The girl nodded. Zayne disappeared, when he got back he had several hot dogs in his hand, he handed one to the girl, here he said. The girl took it and said thanks.












































After a while, Zoe asked what’s your name? The girl said my name is Hail. Zayne said that’s a nice name. Hail smiled. Zoe got up and walked up to Zayne and whispered you know we can’t just leave her by herself. Zayne thought about it and said yeah your right. Zayne turned to the girl and said wanna stay with us. My jaw dropped and I said Zayne are house is all ready hell as it is, we don’t wanan bring her into this. Zayne said relax she could stay in the basement, Fran and Malcolm won’t even Notice. I sighed, and though why not. I held out a hand to the girl and said come on, lets go. Hail took my hand as we walked down the sidewalk.

When we got home; we went around to the back-yard, and opened the door and told hail to stay in the basement. We ran around to the front door and walked in, Fran and Malcolm was sitting on the couch. Your late Malcolm barked.
We got held up Zayne said, were sorry. Fran said yeah well go get cleaned up, so you can eat and go to bed. Zoe said but it’s the weekend. Malcolm said well tuff, what we say goes and they both laughed. We did what we were told; we washed up, and came down for dinner. After dinner, Zayne got a plate full of food and snuck down to the basement. Hail…Hail where you at? A tiny voice said over here. Zayne followed the voice, and said there you are. Zayne handed Hail the plate. He pointed towards a blue box, full of pillows and blankets. Zoe put them there earlier. There clean so don’t worry. Hail smiled and said thank you. Zayne said remember don’t make a sound and snuck back up stairs.



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This book has 9 comments.


Forever SILVER said...
on Mar. 2 2015 at 4:01 pm
Forever SILVER, Flint, Michigan
7 articles 0 photos 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A failure is not always a mistake, it may simply be the best one can do under the circumstances."
B.F. Skinner

I can see the story you are trying to write... really its a good idea. But you are expressing it in the wrong way. The little grammatical errors are driving me crazy and it maked it hard to read at some points. There is also a lot of he said she said stuff. When you read a published book there isn't he said this... then she said this... then he said this. There were no quotes so i couldnt tell when the characters were about to talk so that through me for a loop too. I love the beginning though so keep writing this and i cant wait to hear the rest!!!!!

on May. 5 2014 at 1:56 pm
Crystallite BRONZE, Santa Elena, Other
2 articles 2 photos 347 comments
THIS LOOKS SO COOL

Thalion SILVER said...
on Apr. 28 2014 at 10:51 am
Thalion SILVER, Peoria, Illinois
9 articles 3 photos 53 comments
Not a bad story, but I was throughly confused by the second chapter. The grammer and spelling errors made it really hard to concentrate on the story itself and the way it changed perspectives really threw me a curve. Your thoughts are precise... prehaps too precise in spots.... I'd like to see how you tie the two chapters together, though! 

on Apr. 20 2014 at 2:23 am
Luniverse.Of.Life, Dear Lodge, Montana
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest. I do not judge the universe.
Dalai Lama

this is really good :) I hope you keep writing :)

TheUniverse said...
on Apr. 14 2014 at 8:06 pm
TheUniverse, Everywhere,, Other
0 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
Exercise to stimulate, not to annihilate. The world wasn't formed in a day, and neither were we. Set small goals and build upon them.

This is a very good beginning to the book...  Love the way you've started in the formation and it seems as if your thoughts are precise... I like that......  Keep up the great writing!!!!!!

on Apr. 14 2014 at 8:04 pm
TheOceansBlackBird SILVER, Richmond, California
9 articles 14 photos 115 comments

Favorite Quote:
One persons craziness is another persons reality
-Tim Burton

and then there's this one
╭∩╮(︶︿︶)╭∩╮

This is really good! I like how the prolouge really sets up the story, and how you can really see how poor the two children are. Yet again, you should reallytry to fix your spelling and grammar mistakes...but otherwise I really liked it!

on Apr. 11 2014 at 5:46 pm
TheNobleSavage, Frisco, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 7 comments
Can't wait to see what happens next, although as it has already been said before, those quotation marks though. Otherwise, great story idea.

on Apr. 6 2014 at 12:53 pm
GhostMatrix SILVER, Bradenton, Florida
6 articles 3 photos 82 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live Each Day To The Fullest. -Quote From Somewhere Else-

I'm Whatever You Want Me To Be - My Quote -

Thx you so much for the feedback and i'll work on my grammer and these   "      ".

on Apr. 6 2014 at 8:01 am
Kestrel135 PLATINUM, Waterford, Connecticut
43 articles 0 photos 256 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Respect existence or expect resistance"

This was a good beginning to a book. I like how the introduction really sets up everything for the future; you don't entirely understand the relation, but you know that there is one, and can assume what that relation may be - a great tactic for enticing the reader. There were some really great phrases in here, such as the ending to the prologue. The first chapter also was pretty good, but there were a few grammatical errors - but they didn't really take away from the piece that much. The story itself could branch out into a lot of possibilities; who is the girl in the basement, really? Will Marcus come back?  The only thing that I though was a bit distracting was the dialogue. Sometimes you didn't use " " around words that were being spoken, which could be a bit confusing. Also, in the first chapter it seems as though it is in third person, but then goes into first from Zoe's perspective. Transitions like that can be a bit confusing to the reader, so I would try to keep it in first person the whole time.  Otherwise, this is a great story. The prologue was intruiging and enticed the reader. The first chapter, though a bit slow at times, was also interesting because it allowed you to look into their lives and get a feel for who the characters are. On a whole, this is a start to a great book! Well done!