Dear Society,

Today society told me I wasn’t good enough, and today wasn’t the first time they have told me to shed my skin, into a prettier, thinner, more beautiful version of myself. They told me I was an object to be sexualixed when my teacher told me to cover up so I don’t distract the boys as I ashamedly put on a hoodie saying “yes sir.” They told me I belonged in the house as I buried my nose deep in a chemistry textbook. They told me I needed to lose weight as I scrolled aimlessly through Instagram trying to find a body that wasn’t stick thin and starving. They told me to stop being me. 

Day after day society tells me I am nothing, but a teenage girl without a voice that is just going to grow up, get married, and have kids. Settle. Society wants me to settle. Settle with the discrimination agaisnt women that is still a prevalent part of society. Settle with the fact that I “can’t be smart because I’m a girl.” Settle for being less than my best because society wants to suppress my potential. 

When did this happen to me? When did I start covering my stomach when I walked into a room full of pretty girls? When did I start skipping meals to fit in? When did I start to notice guys catcalling me in the hallways? When did I start to feel scared walking alone? When did I start to equate my value with the number on the scale? When did I start to wear makeup to cover up what wasn’t “perfect''? Why? Is all of this just in my head or some cruel joke on myself? Why do I stay up all night crying? Why do I run on the treadmill for hours to shrink myself? Why has society done this to me and girls all over the world? 

I’m constantly told I am perfect and beautiful, but the moment my pant size goes up is the moment they look at me and ask, “have you gained weight”? The constant pressure of having to be perfect is starting to take its toll. I can’t look in the mirror without pointing out all of the things wrong with me. I can’t eat a cookie without hating myself later. I can’t be myself or feel emotions because everyone will say “oh it’s hormones” or “it must be that time of the month”. It’s all just exhausting.

Adults think that we are being dramatic, but the constant ache for peer approval and validation is never ending. The constant worry that we will be hated is tiring. I can’t. Be. Perfect.

Society tries to tell me that it’s my fault that I feel the way I do, but I’m done. There needs to be a change. Today is the day that I decide to speak out about the way society treats teenage girls because I can’t just sit around anymore and see the way that society is romanticizing eating disorders and unhealthy “healthy” habits. What we really need to glamorize is self love, mental health, working out because it FEELS good not to shrink your body. 

Girls from a young age are taught everything that they should and shouldn’t be. We have kids in elementary school that are on diets. Not only does it start with society, but it starts with parents. We shouldn’t be raising girls in a way that makes them think they need to skip meals, or wear makeup, or always be on the newest diet. I know I was raised in a household where toxic habits were, and that in no way was my parents intentions, but it ended up being detrimental to me. So as a parent, teaching girls to love themselves is one of the best things a parent can do to equip their girls to make it in a world where they are constantly degraded. Raising girls to be secure in their own bodies and minds is essential to making a change, and altering the way that society sees girls. 

Following the change in households, there also needs to be a change in the media. The hate comments and body shaming are a horrible part of social media, but also the toxic diet culture and trending diets. There needs to be more media where girls are supporting girls, we normalize intuitive eating, normalize mid-sized bodies, and encourage girls to feel secure in their own bodies. 

As a teenager, I would like to see a world where my future kids won't feel the need to change who they are for society. I would like to see the toxicity of diet culture disappear. I want to be the reason there is change. I want to create change. 

So with that, today I decided to tell society to respectfully shut up. Leave me, and every other teenage girl alone. Let us eat cookies and have sugar in our coffee. Let us wear what we want and not feel threatened. Let us be comfortable in a size five (or whatever size), let us be us. 

Sincerely,

Every Teenage Girl Ever