Love is such a messed up concept.  It messes with people in so many ways.  People mess with people.  I feel love and I see love.  I can see it all around me.  I can see the damage it does.  Lack of love can kill too.  I see this happen.  Ive seen a girl refuse to love anything because the mere thought of being left turns her away from someone who cares.   So many people fall for her because of how momentous she is.  Easy on the eyes with a colorful soul.  I’ve seen boy after boy fall for her.  I’ve sat back in jealousy and awe wondering how she does it. 

I envy her for who she is.  She doesn't see it though.  She's scared away from feeling because someone mustn't have been so kind before.  I don’t know if she’ll ever find a guy that she doesn't turn away from.  Wow, I hope she does though, because she deserves it.  Some people just don't see in themselves what everyone else does. 
Cheating breaks people down.  It’s distorted love, broken, damaged love.  I’ve seen it turn people cold.  I even cut myself on someone else's broken pieces after they've been cheated on.  It’s like you're hearts being lied to when you're cheated on.  You don't want to trust anyone again.  The happy ending to the guy I’ve seen f***ed up from cheating is he finally found someone else.  Even though every fiber of my being wishes it was me I am genuinely happy for him.  Cheating messes people up but there are people out there to trust you just have to find them. 

Then there’s me, genuinely infatuated with the world.  Finding comfort in people, in nature, in life.  My parents always tell me how lucky I am.  How I’m unappreciative of what I have.  They tell me I wouldn’t survive bad circumstances like they had to undergo.  Recently I think I proved them wrong.  I got in a car accident just a week ago.  Yes I am undoubtedly lucky to be alive and be in such good shape.  I still broke my femur.  I still got slammed into a tree going 60 MPH by my best friend after I told her to slow down.  I still held my bone back in my leg while blood poured onto my hand waiting for the ambulance to come.  I never cried the whole time.  I stayed positive the whole time.  I’m proud of myself, because I’m stronger than I thought.  I’m stronger than my parents thought.  While I was in the hospital the boy I loved texted me and I stayed strong.  I had the last word, I didn’t get butterflies, I didn’t keep the conversation going.  I moved on from the toxicity he caused me.  I just walk through negative circumstances in my life because I love the world.  I find something positive, and I always thought of myself as a pessimist but now I think I’m a glass half full kind of person.  Love got me through it.  Love from my parents, love from my friends, my love for the world.  So yes love is this big tangled unpredictable mess, but it helps us get through the bad.