I assumed college was going to be easygoing, and I was proved wrong. Challenging my life viewpoint caused me to question more things than one about life. I told my mom bye, and I regretted how much I didn’t appreciate her safety throughout the years. Orientation attempted to make me feel comfortable; yet, I felt like college was throwing me to the wolves. I anxiously walked around orientation alone with students who were supposed to have the same interests as me. The students in my group were nothing short of advanced. I felt out of place as I was in a group with science majors who were probably all top of their class. The ambassadors tried to boost morale with dancing; but, the mood flipped when the time came to schedule our courses. My anxiety reached a new peak, and I regretted wanting high school to move as fast as possible. The thought of college brought a smile to my face until I looked at the reality of academics. I wondered if this was the moment that I had to decide the rest of my life. I must admit that this is pretty scary for a high school senior. I felt trapped in my decision and struggled to attend to the remaining hours of orientation. My childhood memories started replaying in my head as I realized there would be so many “last times” this year. I probably won’t even know I did something for the last time before I miss doing it. Because my life was being planned out before my eyes, I reflected on the path we prepare for and life’s uncontrollable path.

As I reflect, I know my parents have to feel some anxiety since I am the last one to go off to college. They will have to change their outlook on what to do with their lives and how each day plans out. They spent the last eighteen years preparing me for the time where they send me off, but I wonder if it was too much. My parent’s protection and love may have just made me stay home. Everyone will have this moment in life where they are unregulated and free, but one doesn’t know how to run with this freedom. Growing up in schools that set restrictions makes it hard for me to open up to opportunity. I am never going to be in a safety net anymore, and this is my time to be who I was meant to be. The thought of college may get more comfortable, but from the time being, I feel stressed and challenged by something everyone goes through in life. Society assumes college is full of partying, and a year ago I would have agreed. On top of academics, college students have to manage their own money and be responsible. The society that says college is the best time of one’s life is also the society that blames college students for giving up. College students have the pressure to uncover who they are while studying for who they want to be. When I think about getting to the point of college graduation, I struggle to believe that I will feel settled in what I do for the rest of my life. Life’s uncontrollable path tests people's expectations of their future. As a spouse and children grow on to one’s life, the future one studied for may have gone out the window. The change from a diligent college student to a busy parent or spouse holds to the fact that we may always feel unprepared for life even though we prepared through experience and opportunity. The world is an uncontrollable place for people to dream for a life they hope can be achieved.