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flash_drive

May 18, 2023
By Anonymous

I have met child prodigies before.

I have met kids who have skipped grades. Kids who have taken AP exams in middle school. Kids who can play the piano and the violin and the cello and every instrument that a human being can play with two hands and their mouth.

I have met kids who are leaders of clubs and attend volunteer events and take care of elderly people on their weekends. Kids who have led the debate team while being the ace on the science bowl team and still having time for robotics.

And yet.

Isn’t it hilarious how in the gifted and talented program, where everyone is accepted because they are special, I’ve seen the lowest self-esteem I’ve ever seen in such a large group of people?

Devastation at anything less than an A. Terrifying fear when applying to programs. Tears at the realization that you are not the best, while there is only a rapidly growing overwhelming pressure to be the best in a group where it isn’t possible to be the best.

There is no number one when everyone is playing a different game.

Is there a way to transfer memories?

Is there a way to transfer emotions and pain and tears?

Is there a way to reach into someone’s heart and let them understand without the trouble of years of suffering and self-hatred and pressure that being the “best” doesn’t exist?

Is there a way to explain that I’ve gone through it before and that millions of people have gone through it before too? That the long line of lawyers and engineers and scientists standing before them that they look up to so greatly only have one regret from their childhood, and it’s that they did exactly what kids are doing today?

When the world is so cruel and tries to suffocate us every day, why are we so eager to try to assist it?

When the chaos of the universe tries to blind us every day with stars that shine so much brighter than us, why are we so believing that it is safe to hold a gun to our own heads?

Who told all of us that doing all this was okay? That stressing and rushing life and believing you aren’t worthy if you settle for anything less than number one was okay?

Is there a flash drive I can stick into the brains of the children following my footsteps so I can tell them that it’s really, really all okay, even if they don’t do all that?

Is there a way to explain that life has things planned out for them, and even without overworking yourself day and night and night and day, it will be okay?

I hate that I have to admit it, but I don’t believe there is.

I really don’t believe there is.

Perhaps this is very well the only chance I have to reach out to the young hearts out in the world who are in pain and suffering and yet push it to the side as if their own emotions are irrelevant.

Perhaps this is very well the only chance I have to explain that there is love reaching out to every single one of them and that they deserve love - not only from the people surrounding them, but from within themselves.

Perhaps this is very well my only chance to let them know that it will be okay.

And it will be okay.

I promise you.



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