Picture this… You are smack in the middle of quartleys week as an all honors student, collapsing with the stress accompanied by the building that is your homework. Suddenly, The Homework Pill is introduced to you and it’s side effects work instantaneously doubling your stress! How are we so lucky to have access to such a luxury? This is all thanks to the new medication created years ago and perfected by teachers today! With this wonderful pill of homework, they can enjoy a mentally safe year!

The medication’s called; The Homework Pill. The directions are super simple. Teachers, simply send a student home with about two hours of homework per class. Then, the exhausted teen will have to lug home a super heavy backpack. So heavy that they will want to go off to fifth grade where wheelie backpacks were a staple. The student thought maybe once they received outrageously fancy Mac Book Airs, their backpack would be decreased in weight, since everything would be online. What a disappointment that was. In fact, the backpack increased in weight and size due to the fact the laptop just added on more weight on top of the textbooks. Students can’t complain, they are being treated like royalty with all of these books they have to carry around, it’s as if they are a walking library!
When the student gets home, an urge will captivate them, wanting to rip out their insides, all out of anger, due to their school related problems. One of which certainly being, having back issues. Students will then repeat this daily until the last day of school. Sadly, the students cannot do anything about their reoccurring dilemmas. Just wait, it gets better.

After the student procrastinates for a short to long period of time, they will gather all their strength and carry their boulder of a backpack upstairs. What fun! Following the transport, they will then proceed to put their homework on their desk, and get to the dreaded work. Just spending three to four hours on homework should add way more stress right away. The first drag of the pencil will, guaranteed, include a major sigh. One will feel like they are being chained to the chair in order to do the homework. Some may say, “It’s worse than death”.
This medication’s purpose overall is to give students so much homework that they have no life whatsoever. Homework really causes many issues, so this pill will be a huge hit. First, homework is believed to be “pointless” and “stupid” by many students. Secondly, homework is the number one reason for sleep deprivation, which is perfect for growing teens. Throughout the day they are very tired, some even falling asleep in class, but that’s what school is for right? Also, the cycle never stops, so guess it’s time to go back to taking naps again. This is what homework is for though, so cause so much pain and stress that teens don’t know what to do with themselves anymore.

With the purchase of this medication now, included is a fast acting pill, which adds three tests to your workload for the next day. It’s just like magic! The lab reports for homework cause major headaches, and the best part, they take at least three hours. Who needs friends anyways? Additionally, constructing all of those essays and reading all of those chapters, makes it even worse. How much better can this exclusive offer get? All of this homework can lead to drowsiness, but the next day the process repeats so there’s really no time for you to catch up on sleep! At school, it is expected that homework be guaranteed. Teachers seem to follow this motto, “The more the merrier! “. It’s as if the students don’t do enough work in class.  Juggling homework, a social life, and sports/activities, is the perfect combo to a stress free day!

This product is available through schoology, in class, and perhaps it will soon be in schools around the world. Teachers are tirelessly searching for ways to incorporate so much more homework that their students plummet in other classes.  If students think for one second they’re going to be able to see their friends on weekdays after they do their homework, well, there is no such thing as “after homework”.

  One individual, who took the pill on the first day of school, and every weekday since, has felt the side effects. The Homework Pill is certainly bringing down GPA’s, along with giving students the luxury of having increased stress all year round. The stress is just growing, and it’s only October. The Homework Pill is just really abusing teens mentally and physically. Back pains, headaches, migraines, you name it, it’s there. Don’t fail to remember that adolescents are very fragile, emotionally, during these years, so it’s a perfect time to make them way more stressed out then they need to be. Consequently, we will be tracking the progress with this magical pill that has come about. There is a firm belief that students really love how much homework they are getting, but who wouldn’t?

The principal has announced that he is excited to double the dosage of The Homework Pill in the second marking period. However, Indian Hills thinks they can handle more homework than us, but there’s no way our student council would let that happen. So, students, get ready to have no life at all!