Since the history of mankind, women were always self-conscious about looking good and having a good figure. In today’s society beauty is everything. People eat right, go to the gym, and shop at expensive store or stop eating just to feel accepted that they are beautiful; also known as GTL (Gym, Tan, Laundry).

So the mother of all questions is when a girl asks you, “Does this outfit make me look fat?” Beware to answer it carefully; the next few words can determine your future because women are VICIOUS CREATURES. Answering this question is like walking down a mined field, one wrong step and KAABOOOM… you’re dead meat.

One time I was getting ready to go out to dinner with my friends. It was a special occasion; we were all meeting up at restaurant for a very close friend’s birthday. We all meet up, and one of the girls we met up with was arguing with her friends saying that she doesn’t look as good as everyone else, that she needs to stop eating, and about how fat she is-I totally disagreed-So she comes up to us and asks us “Does this dress make me look fat?” we all look at each other thinking this isn’t going to end well.

I say, “I think you look fine.” (Which was true.)

My friend on the other hand, the a****** that he is, says “that BOOTY is what makes you look fat” trying to be funny.

…………………….MAN DOWN!

She storms off like a bull in a china shop (meaning she was pissed). Never ever have I seen her so mad in my life. For a second I was worried about my own safety. The night started off little awkward, but I believe it ended up well. But she didn’t talk to him for weeks. They finally ended up talking again after he apologized and she humiliated him in public by pulling down his pants for everyone to see. Not a pleasant view at all.

Things not to say: Anything that has to do with saying “YOU’RE FAT!”

If a girl ever asks you a question about her weight, don’t try to be funny. Tell- her- she- looks- beautiful, even if she does have the sexual appeal of Shrek, the green ogre. It never ends well if you say the truth. My friend learned it the hard way, glad I didn’t get to make that mistake.

Lesson learned: LIE or else… KAAAABOOOOOOM!