I walk into the roller skating rink and am immediately bombarded from behind by my friend Hannah. With a hug and a huge grin she drags me over to the skates and orders a size seven. A sneaky smile on her face, Hannah practically pushes my feet into the skates and me out to the rink. My protests are fruitless, but when I let myself, I actually have a blast, and don’t fall once! (It's my first time roller skating). The rink becomes a blur of color and sound, pop music blasting, Patriots fans cheering (they’re broadcasting the game live), kids chomping on popcorn or ice cream, their hands sticky and bellies full.

When my feet are too sore to enjoy myself any longer I traipse over to the TV and plop down on a metal folding chair to watch the football game with Hannah's older sister, Autumn. Her face is animated as she tries to explain the game to me, but to no avail. Soccer is my sport; I'm already so pumped for the World Cup! Autumn’s huge smile grows even bigger and her dark brown envy inducing ringlets bounce when the Pats finally score and she jumps up from her seat, fist pumping, joy consuming her stunning features. "Yes!"

During the next commercial break Autumn’s question jolts me out of a trance. I’ve spaced out watching a car dealer convince me why his automobiles are that much more of a deal than all the other cars out there. His dazzlingly white teeth are admittedly quite convincing. Oops. “So what kind of music do you listen to?” What a relief, a topic I can rant about. I blab on and on about the genius of Paul Simon, the beauty of Norah Jones’ vocals, and the kick-ass lyrics of the Grateful Dead. After a while I have to stop myself because Autumn’s too polite to do it herself. If someone doesn't check me I am guaranteed to talk myself hoarse about music. (Now if only I could sing).

I finally ask Autumn about her music, and she mentions a bunch of bands I've never heard of, probably because they’re all Christian rock bands. Hannah and Autumn’s family are 7th Day Adventists, which I’d never thought much of until Autumn says something that catches me by surprise. To be quite honest I don’t quite catch her exact words because something has caught my eye on the TV. Again. I do hear most of what she says, and it’s something along the lines of: “There’s this band I really like, but the lead singer is gay which makes it sort of weird for me to listen to.” I nod mindlessly, now distracted by my phone, then do a bit of a double take. Wait. Did Autumn just imply she has a problem with someone being gay? Did I hear wrong? (I hope so). Did she mean something else? My whole opinion of their family, whom I admittedly haven’t known for more than a few years, is questioned in an instant by one seemingly casual remark made by a friend. Thinking back I know I should have said something, asked Autumn what she meant, but she’s up and running to help her parents with something before I can gather my thoughts, so I let it slide.

The feeling of unease can’t be shaken, so later at home I sit in front of the computer and Google “7th Day Adventist”. Using the ever faithful Wikipedia I read all about the beliefs and practices of the group my new-found friends identify with. It’s actually quite fascinating. I’m somewhat entranced by the belief of the imminent second coming of Jesus Christ, so different from my own self-proclaimed Atheism. I keep scrolling, and eventually hit the jackpot. “Ethics and sexuality”. At long last I find what I’m really looking for, underneath a short section about unwanted pregnancies: “...heterosexual marriages are the only biblically ordained grounds for sexual intimacy. Adventists do not perform same sex marriages, and individuals who are openly homosexual...may be disfellowed from the church.” The words burn beneath my eyelids, I sigh and lean back in my chair. Falling into a state of despair, a glimmer of hope comes to me, barely a whisper but audible nonetheless. Just because 7th Day Adventists are generally against gay marriage doesn't mean their family is, the hope whispers. Remembering what Autumn had said though, the hope is squashed beneath my disheartenment and despair.

To me the question of homosexuality is decidedly simple and at the same time exceedingly complicated. In it’s simplest terms, I think of it this way: Being born into this world innocent and vulnerable, you unknowingly throws your arms wide open and and let all the factors in your life shape who you are and will become. Growing older, you begin to make your own decisions based on beliefs and knowledge you have pulled from the people around you, and the events you have experienced. Later on down the road, when love finds someone and floods them with emotion, the interest of their affections is not decided thanks to a conscious decision. It might be a man or woman, either way is completely natural and not within your control. Human beings are blessed with the incredible ability to love and there is no one out there who can really explain it or decide that someone else’s love is “unnatural”.

When I have at last come to terms with my new-found discovery the next day, something incredible comes to mind. The sheer number of differences we will overlook or accept between ourselves and someone we care about is amazing. Autumn and Hannah are my friends and I’m almost willing to ignore an opinion they carry, one I strongly disagree with, because I enjoy their company immensely, even with our friendship just beginning. That being said, I feel in a sense that being friends with people who have those opinions makes me very hypocritical. I’m not really standing up to my beliefs, so why have them at all?

Flashback to the roller skating party, and dinner at Hannah’s. Meeting them for the first time and instantly wanting to know them better. We first met when I came over one unusually cold and blustery day in October three ago to help their family and friends with cidering. My dad had worked with their dad at one point and invited us over to join in the fun. Bonding over hot cocoa and a common goal- to fill as many gallons of cider as we could in as little time possible-we worked like well oiled machines. When the last cap had been put on the last gallon and everyone was finished cheering and finishing off the snacks, I looked at Autumn and Hannah and smiled to myself, joyous I had connected with these awesome people. From then on I would jump at the chance to eat dinner with their family, go roller skating with them, and be a part of cider production year after year. Now those blissful moments feels like a lie, in a sense I was enjoying myself with people I didn't truly know. Our friendship will unfold, and hopefully it will become apparent whether or not I’ll be willing to relinquish a moral I've held myself to for as long as I've been old enough to form my own opinions. It’s crazy how one string of words caused what I thought I knew about someone to do a 180. A few perfectly innocent words standing alone, but when strung together can implant tension and unease, and cause the seemingly crystal clear future to be clouded over with worries and doubts surrounding one of the humans race’s touchiest topics, love.