Who I Really Am | Teen Ink

Who I Really Am

May 1, 2009
By pinksage33 BRONZE, Woodstock, New York
pinksage33 BRONZE, Woodstock, New York
4 articles 1 photo 211 comments

Thoughts of you
Keep running through
My weary head

Like a river
Do you see me
Sanding near you

The answer is no
Your arms are wrapped
Around her neck
In a sickening way
With love and tenderness
In your deep dangerous eyes

I wish you would see
What you mean to me
But that is just a fantasy

Unravel your arms
From round her neck
And see who I really am


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This article has 21 comments.


Lexie96 GOLD said...
on Nov. 9 2011 at 9:08 pm
Lexie96 GOLD, Havana, Illinois
11 articles 0 photos 378 comments

Favorite Quote:
Now Cinderella don't you go to sleep, it's such a bitter form of refuge, oh don't you know the kingdom's under siege, and everbody needs you. - The Killers

I really like this and I think it's so relatable and true. Great work and really well written, I was a bit weary of it at first, but then I started reading it and it was just great!

Think you could check out my work sometime? My poem Broken Barbie Doll is kinda similar to this.


NatalieB. GOLD said...
on Jan. 2 2010 at 10:21 am
NatalieB. GOLD, Loudon, Virginia
12 articles 0 photos 61 comments

Favorite Quote:
Make your own lines, and color outside of them.

This is the first of your work I have read. I love it!!! Your writing style is wonderfull and I hope you continue to post more articles!!!

on Dec. 31 2009 at 10:00 am
bookworm75 SILVER, Monticello, New York
5 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Teachers open the door, you enter yourself"

I loved it, so great, Thanks for the comment on one of the articles i wrote. The dad I never knew. Your a greatg writer. btw

on Sep. 3 2009 at 6:23 pm
kiwi12 PLATINUM, Austin, Texas
28 articles 10 photos 365 comments
I've wanted to say that last stanza to a few people...

Great work!!

on Aug. 10 2009 at 9:19 pm
Katie_Potatie PLATINUM, Leavenworth, Kansas
36 articles 1 photo 30 comments

Favorite Quote:
There are no regrets in my life; because there is no time for mistakes. -(ME) Katie quote

Omg!! This is amazing. It's fantastic. Your fantastic. I love it so much. and thanks for commenting on mine. im glad u liked it.

on Aug. 4 2009 at 9:40 pm
jennee21_ann GOLD, Helper, Utah
17 articles 0 photos 568 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't gain the world and lose your soul....wisdom is better than silver or gold."

"You can always close a book, but you can never close the mind of a writer."

hey this is really really good! i love how you wrote this short, sweet but with HEART!! would you mind checking out my work and commenting?

great job!

on Jun. 30 2009 at 4:33 pm
pinksage33 BRONZE, Woodstock, New York
4 articles 1 photo 211 comments

Joanna said...
on Jun. 28 2009 at 8:51 pm
Joanna, St. Catharines, Other
0 articles 0 photos 165 comments
I love the way you used short lines to write your poem. I think it would work well if you seperated the line, "The answer is no" from the rest of the verse (it helps to sort out the events). My, it is wonderful. You certainly have talent Pinksage33. Nicely done!

on Jun. 26 2009 at 2:55 pm
Genevieve BRONZE, Chicago, Illinois
4 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Being born is like being kidnapped. And then sold into slavery."

I really liked this poem. You commented on my essay so I thought I'd check out your work, and this poem is really really good. Keep up your writing!

amyxu said...
on Jun. 25 2009 at 11:46 pm
Hey, nice poem. I like the flow of it a lot, the words flow so naturally. One suggestion, in the last stanza the word "round" seemed a little bit out of place compared to the formal tone of the rest of the poem. So maybe it cold be changed to "around." This is of course your decision entirely. Good job and keep writing!

on Jun. 24 2009 at 10:28 pm
GinaThompson01 SILVER, Miami, Florida
8 articles 2 photos 7 comments
this is really good!!

thanks for reading my essay .

:)

on Jun. 23 2009 at 10:38 pm
pinksage33 BRONZE, Woodstock, New York
4 articles 1 photo 211 comments

on Jun. 23 2009 at 7:56 pm
JamminJos23 GOLD, Sandy, Oregon
11 articles 2 photos 25 comments

Favorite Quote:
Stand up for what is right, even if you are standing alone.

this poem is really good and i cant wait to read more of ur work...

on Jun. 23 2009 at 6:27 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

totally worth clicking on! ITS AWESOME!

Lonleydandy said...
on Jun. 21 2009 at 4:37 pm
It was REALLY good. I can totally relate!!!!

PK4evr ELITE said...
on Jun. 17 2009 at 6:16 pm
PK4evr ELITE, Allen, Texas
105 articles 5 photos 107 comments

Favorite Quote:
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch everyone wonder how you did it!

Awwww, it's beautiful. Thanks for your comments on... well, almost every poem i've ever written... haha... :)

on Jun. 16 2009 at 2:18 pm
pinksage33 BRONZE, Woodstock, New York
4 articles 1 photo 211 comments
i submitted 2 more articals and i will b wrighting more. so keep your eyes open. thanks for the comments ppl.

rokie101 said...
on Jun. 16 2009 at 2:13 am
wow i love it!!!! its really deep!!!

on Jun. 15 2009 at 11:51 pm
Dandelion PLATINUM, Franklin, Massachusetts
20 articles 8 photos 173 comments
I love this poem. I love the similes and the descriptions. I'd love to see more of your work on TeenInk; you only have one article up!

on Jun. 14 2009 at 4:01 am
SmileyRiley PLATINUM, Tremont, Illinois
30 articles 0 photos 37 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You can be a victor without having victims and you can stand tall without standing on someone"

i love it. you commented on my article called Knock off Jeans and boots with the faux (thanks btw) and so i thought i would check out your poem. this is wonderful!