My inner nerd has taken many lands,
leaving nothing behind but bodies and blood in the sands,
in a time of need he is there to take a stance,
and sadly, he is no stranger to final stands.

My inner nerd has slain dragons,
navigated taverns; spilling flagons,
followed Tolkien's tale of Frodo Baggins,
traversed a frontier in a covered wagon.

My inner nerd stopped the reign of Hyperion's Handsome Jack,
making psycho, marauder, and bandit corpses stack,
was killed by the mysterious Collectors; but came back,
and made Frank Fontaine cry; "would you kindly take that gun out from my butt crack?"

My inner nerd is the Hero of Fereldan,
a furious button mashing Zeldan,
a fan of Big Bang's Sheldon,
and had escaped a blazing Fort called Helgen.

My inner nerd is everything I wish I could be,
a fearless hero who would believe without needing to see,
a paragon that holds your heart's key,
a Spartan like 117 that would never take a knee.

My inner nerd was stuck on the field,
left all alone with no Hylian Shield,
couldn't save the day like the Man of Steel,
unable to stop them from discarding you like a banana peel.

My inner nerd misses you still,
can’t believe you acted like Dr. Mario and took that pill,
losing you feels like a hit from a Big Daddy's drill,
it left a hole that nothing else could fill.

Escape all the pain with a brand new game.