when your heart hurts | Teen Ink

when your heart hurts

May 11, 2016
By Edeanwolf BRONZE, New York, New York
Edeanwolf BRONZE, New York, New York
3 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We yearned for the future. How did we learn it, that talent for insatiability?"


PART ONE:
He was loved by many although
His lovers seemed to leave in the blink
Of an eye once things were desirable
Suddenly leaving him in the vast
Pit of despair cutting the strings
That tied their hearts together in
A loving bond unknown to many
And he would give and give and give
Not asking for return from those
He poured his whole heart into

When he was nine years old he
Told his dad that he was eternally
Grateful for being born to a great
Man who taught him to dance a
Slow waltz and to read and to express
How much he cares to another being
They tied two pieces of their hearts together
On a Sunday afternoon for no one
Loved like they did before and maybe
They thought no one ever would

His father left one day and never
Came back for reasons unknown
And that pulled on his heart string
That was attached to his old man’s and
When he woke the next morning to
Birds chirping and the warm breeze
Of an early august day to a pain in his
Chest and the broken untied knot
Of his little heart string that once connected
Him to the greatest man he once knew


PART TWO:
When he was thirteen he fell for
A girl that he loved unconditionally
They were in every class together
And they sat close together sharing secret
Stories about their hopes and dreams
She taught him to love and to care
With delicacy and how to ease the hurt
He felt from the missing parts that
His Father had taken away from him
How to replace his broken heart’s parts

They laughed and danced and created
New worlds together in a bubble of
Pure joy they lived in this alteration
Where there was nothing more important
Than the other person and they were
Unstoppable together so they made a vow
To always stay together and connected
Pieces of themselves so they were attached
At the heart and would carry parts of the
Other for what seemed like forever

She cut at the knot on Friday night
When she realized that they were
Never going to be enough for the
Other and that she could never do
The right thing to make him eternally
Happy or at least that’s what she had
Thought not knowing that she was more
Than he could ask for and that was
The end of their happy little world
As they knew it as they made it

?
PART THREE:
When he turned seventeen he thought
That he had found the one for him
He found a girl who fluttered around
In a care-free manor whose hair fell
Effortlessly down her shoulder blades
And rested at the small of her back
Whose eyes could reflect the entirety of
The universe if the sun hit them the right
Way which always seemed to happen
Every time he looked at her with admiration

They drew with words they painted
Whole novels of beautiful phrases
That captured their beings into a
Tangible piece after they decided to make
Their love eternal tying sections of their
Hearts together like you would tie
Your shoelaces in the morning carefully
Looping a bow into place thinking
They would never be this happy
That no one had ever felt this way

She took her bags and fled for
A new place thinking that her problems
Couldn’t follow and she carefully undid
The little bow that had given her so much
Joy and so much pain at the same time
She ripped to shreds the idea of a normal
Home life with kids or jobs or laughs
She couldn’t withstand the thought
Of someone leaving her so she was
Always the one to leave them first

 

PART FOUR:
By thirty he was happy and married
Thinking he finally found the partner
That would be there forever and she
Was they were happy together they
Vowed their love to each other in front
Of everyone they knew showing that
They could never be ashamed of how
They felt how they loved how they never
Wanted to wake to the other not being
Right next to them all sleepy and beautiful

They had a steady marriage filled with
Passion and creativity they had jobs and
Travelled and supported one another
Without needing to be right there the
Whole way even though they ended up
Catching each other’s best moments
They lived together and decided that
They wanted pieces of themselves
Mixed with pieces of the other in a
New life that they could raise

It’s a girl he cheered when they saw
The tiny image of their child on the
Screen with a heart that could beat
She rushed to the hospital when the
Baby wanted to be born and she
Laid in a bed full of exhaustion
Her life had left her and now it
Was just the baby and him so he
Cursed at the world while holding
What was left of his wife and their kid

?
PART FIVE:
When his daughter reached three they
Had already created a bond that was
Unbreakable that was solid to the core
He finally found relief in being with
Another person who was half of himself
Who was half his wife who he had loved
More than he had loved himself
Their hearts were tied this time triple
Knotted to ensure that they would
Never be broken or left behind

She grew up and had the grace
Of her mother and the heart
Of her father and the love they both
Put in and there she was a creation
Of divinity and there she stayed
Until the man became old and
Wrinkly and she loved him enough
When he forgot how to and so she
Loved him with joy and loved with anger
She loved him this way for the rest of forever

He told her of how you could tie your
Hearts together how his old man once
Showed him what that could mean
How he felt like everyone had left him
At one point or another how she was
The one true love forever and after
That night he slipped away in his sleep
He could go and be happy because he
Finally found out what the beauty
Of family could be of love could be

 

PART SIX:
He passed into his next life with no
Resentments left heated and found a new
Way to bring on his knowledge of love
And the beauty of being with another
So when he found what looked like a true
Pairing he tied their hearts together hoping
That what would come from it was the
Happy he felt of being with his daughter
He wanted to pass on the joy and love
And glory forever for others

When he saw two people loving together
He decided to put them into a new journey
Together his purpose was to show others
What real love could feel like and maybe
They would end up happy together
It was his destiny he came to believe
For no one but his daughter knew that
You could bond yourself to another
He wanted everyone to feel how he felt
Even the hardship that came before it

So when you’ve lost someone and
Some part of your heart hurts know
That the man and his wisdom thought
That your love would last that he
Was acting in your life as a matchmaker
That no matter how bad your heart
Hurts now that a piece of you will
Forever be a piece of them and that
One day you will be able to experience
The love of someone who will stay for you


The author's comments:

a modern epic poem


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