Not a Cat with Nine Lives | Teen Ink

Not a Cat with Nine Lives

June 21, 2013
By Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 444 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” –David Letterman


Call the mortician,
He’s run a year late;
I was dead long ago,
I had accepted my fate.

My emaciated skeletal system can’t be repaired,
The residues of my wasted brain can’t get any older.
P.S. You can’t heal a broken spirit
With a butterfly kiss to the shoulder.

Who do you think you are, a surgeon?
Well, be my guest: give your magical soul-stitches a try.
Just don’t go around blaming me
When you hopelessly cry.

I can’t reincarnate; I’m not Buddhist.
Show me nirvana and I’ll break out in hives.
Don’t try electric-shocking my corpse, either.
I won’t reawaken; I’m not a cat with nine lives.


The author's comments:
I was feeling extra sarcastic and extremely bored when writing this piece.

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This article has 7 comments.


Beila BRONZE said...
on Feb. 25 2015 at 1:17 pm
Beila BRONZE, Palo Alto, California
3 articles 0 photos 516 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco." -Mark Twain

Your voice is incredible. From the first line, your sarcasm is tangible, and it's consistent throughout. Your style is so original, and I'm captivated by it when I'm reading. Love it!

on Jul. 30 2013 at 8:30 pm
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 444 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” –David Letterman

Yeah, I tend to do that a lot. :D Sarcasm's my husband, duh! Thank you so much for commenting, it means a lot to me.

on Jul. 30 2013 at 8:17 pm
Jade.I.Am ELITE, Fishers, Indiana
214 articles 14 photos 1159 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If you're losing your soul and you know it, then you've still got a soul left to lose”
― Charles Bukowski

This is so witty I can feel the sarcasm through the computer screen AND I approve XD. I think we both have the same style of answering our own questions within a poem..if you know what I mean. I liked the first stanza the best but the whole thing was incredible. Dnt really know how to express what I thought of it, but just know that I LOVED it :p

on Jul. 20 2013 at 6:55 pm
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 444 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” –David Letterman

Thanks! I wrote this when I had dislocated a rib, and I was told under no uncertain terms that I could not participate in any activity that required lifting (which, if you hard think about it, lifting things is a major part of everyone's daily routine). So I pictured my skeletal system wasting away, which was the starting idea for this poem. Thank you for commenting! Have a great day! :P

on Jul. 19 2013 at 10:33 pm
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

Hey! This is SO good. I am highly impressed and highly amused with this poem. I had no idea what it would be about, but I really liked the title and I thought it might be interesting to read. But you took this to a whole new level and I love this. I love the slight rhymes and I love the attitude here, how sassy and completely sarcastic. GREAT, GREAT, GREAT job!

on Jul. 13 2013 at 7:38 pm
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 444 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” –David Letterman

Thank you! :D

on Jul. 12 2013 at 11:45 pm
CarlieWriter BRONZE, Prairie Village, Kansas
2 articles 3 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Beauty is in the heart of the beholder.
- H. G. Wells

I absolutely love this. Great work. Keep it up!